Thursday, July 6, 2006

About Some Cars

My husband can behave like a child when he wants to.

See, he used to collect Matchbox cars. You know, those tiny things? He collected the police ones because, well, he's a military policeman. He started collecting them when we were married and used to display them on our entertainment center. When we moved here he put them back on the entertainment center and kept them there for a few months.

Until we had a fight and I told him he was childish for displaying a children's toy.

He immediately took offense and shouted, "You don't like the cars!?" Then he stomped dramatically into the kitchen, yanked out a plastic bag from underneath the sink, stomped back out and started throwing the cars in the bag.

"Fine. You'll never have to see them again!" he yelled, throwing one car in after another.

I probably shouted out, "GOOD!" or something silly like that.

When we cooled off I said he could put them back if he liked. He just shrugged and said that he was finished with them for now.

They've sat in our closet ever since.

Tommy has become really interested in cars so I asked if he could play with Tom's cars, as they're only collecting dust.

Tom looked pained. "Um. Those are mine," he told me with wide eyes.

"I know but can Tommy just play with some of them at least?" I asked.

"Um. What if he breaks one? Or puts it in his," Tom gulped hard, "mouth?"

I rolled my eyes. "Tom, Tommy rarely puts things in his mouth anymore. You know that. Just let him pick out a few."

Tom looked panicked. "NO!" he boomed. Then he lowered his voice. "I'll pick out a few. Okay? The rest don't get touched."

He picked out two cars. TWO out of twenty. Even that looked painful to him. He showed them to Tommy, who brightened and grew excited.

"Hey police cars!" Tommy said with a big grin. He reached out to take them but Tom recoiled his hand back.

"Wait. Rules first," Tom announced.

Tom blinked at him in surprise.

"Rule one, play with them nicely. Don't throw them. Don't bang them against other cars. Okay?" Tom began.

Tommy still looked a little shocked to be getting a lecture on playing with toy cars. Still, he went, "Okay.."

"Rule two: do not, under any circumstances put the cars in your mouth. Down your pants. Or anyplace else they shouldn't be. If I find one in the toilet your butt is mine," Tom continued.

Tommy started to smile when Tom used the word "toilet" but he immediately wiped it off his face when Tom looked at him sternly.

Tom stood there for a few seconds, as though trying to come up with more rules. Then he shrugged and handed the cars over to Tommy, who eagerly took them.

"Eee-ohhh eee-ohh!" Tommy said, making a siren sound as he pushed them along the floor.

Tom still looked a little pained. I gave him a hug and said as though I were addressing a child, "You did a good thing.."

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