Monday, November 16, 2009

Paranormal Activity

“I’m scared,” I admitted to my husband Tom before I left. I slung my purse over my shoulder and grabbed the car keys off the counter.

“It’s just pretend,” Tom reminded me.

I took a deep breath before I left. “Right. It’s just pretend.”

I was on my way to pick up a friend. Then we were headed to see Paranormal Activity. See, I love ghost movies. But they always freak me out. I suppose it would be best for me to avoid films with ghosts but I can’t help it. I’m intrigued.

And as for the friend? Well, I met her online. Tom says this is typical of me since I’m such a hermit. I don’t consider myself a hermit. I’m just shy. It’s not easy for me to approach someone and start a conversation. I envy those who can easily do it but I am not one of those people.

The friend and I met at the park a few days prior to the movie. Tom was nervous about this.

“Suppose she kidnaps you?” he said. He thinks everyone on the Internet has evil intentions. He watches too many cop shows.

“She won’t kidnap me, Tom,” I assured him.

“Suppose she kidnaps Natalie?”

“We’re on a military base, Tom. We’ll be okay,” I said.

“Maybe you should bring a weapon. Just in case,” Tom said. He tried to stick his pocket knife into my purse but I moved it away.

“Tom! I’ll be fine!” I shrieked, lifting my purse over my head.

And I was fine. She was perfectly normal. Her name is Amanda and she has two kids of her own.

Of course it was my daughter who threw a colossal fit when it was time to leave the park. It’s like, “Hi, nice to meet you. Don’t mind my daughter’s lungs.”

Then it came time to see the movie. I was thrilled to get out minus children. When I backed out of our driveway I was tempted to shout, “I’m free! I’m free!” But I didn’t. I just thought it.

Amanda and I had a lot of talk about. I kept reminding myself not to act like a complete dork. Sometimes I can say the strangest things. Like one time I went, “It’s too bad you can’t put muzzles on children,” and I was TOTALLY joking but the chick I was talking to looked absolutely horrified that I would even say something like that. Some people just don’t get my humor. Or my sarcasm. So I really do try to tone it down until a person gets to know me.

Then the movie started and I was instantly nervous. I kept reminding myself that the movie was not real. At first I was all, “And if it’s a nice ghost then it’s okay…”

But of course it wasn’t a nice ghost. It was a demon ghost.

I nearly choked on my diet coke when I found this out. A DEMON ghost?

I didn’t understand why the couple slept with the lights off. I’m sorry, but if I were being haunted by a DEMON GHOST I’d keep all the lights on. But they kept flicking off the lights.

I closed my eyes a few times. I did not want to see the demon ghost.

Then the main male character yelled something like, “Show yourself!” I was all, “For the love of chocolate, DON’T show yourself! I don’t wanna see a demon ghost!”

The movie sort of abruptly ended. From the corner of my eye I noticed some teenaged theater workers sauntering in, ready to clean up. I was thinking, “How rude! The movie isn’t over yet…” but then I realized that it was.

It’s just, the movie didn’t have credits rolling and such. It just…ended.

And yes, I was creeped out on how it ended.

When I got home Tom asked me how it was.

“I’m freaked out,” I admitted.

I swore a demon ghost was breathing on me. It just turned out to be the vent. But still.

I swore there were ghost eyes in the corner, watching me.

It was just the cat.

“What’s THAT?” I shrieked as I climbed into bed.

“The toilet,” Tom said tiredly.

Well, in my defense, in the dark it looked quite sinister.

“Oh no, attack of the commode,” Tom said, his eyes closed.

I heard weird thumps. In the movie, the ghost made a lot of noise.

It was a long night.

I think my next movie is going to be a happy one.

That way I don’t start to think that the dresser is a gigantic ghost who wants to eat me.

49 comments:

  1. oh man! i am the SAME exact way... after i watch a brilliantly scary movie i say that i refuse to watch any more... but i always do.. i always go back!!

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  2. I don't really get scared with movies, but I've heard that this one is really freaky. I will have to check it out.

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  3. I have a daughter that has actually had paranormal activity - in the house we just moved her from, but she still sleeps will lights blazing! I PRAY she sill not see that movie!

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  4. You're hilarious! The funny thing is that I swear you were describing me!

    Lynnette Labelle
    http://lynnettelabelle.blogspot.com

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  5. Oh my. Did you not see my blog where I totally warned you that the movie was dumb. The premise was good and scary but I didn't think they developed it well. And the guy was a moron. Seriously, who taunts a demon?? Guys who are way sorry later that's who.

    So if my book gets published and they make it into a way scary movie will you still go see it? Even if it makes you tell your children to stop talking to things you can't see?? Please?

    I'm totally laughing with you not at you!
    ♥Spot

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  6. Oh scary... meeting someone you met on-line at the park... That should of been good "training" for seeing a movie like this one!

    I think I last jumped at a movie when I saw Pet Cemetery when the character played by Hermann Munster steps out of the raining gloom with something bundled in his arms...

    Booooooooooo!!!

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  7. I love your description of this! I'm a huge wimp about scary movies, they inevitably give me terrible nightmares and I try to avoid them at all costs. That hasn't stopped my boyfriend from trying to get me to go see this one, though!

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  8. The lights bothered me, too. And they left their door open. I don't know, if a ghost was in my house I'd close the door and turn on the light. And then I'd move. But that's just me and it wouldn't make that interesting of a story.

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  9. I don't watch scary movies for that very reason. I hate being scared- I can't turn my mind off.

    And if you said you wish they made muzzles for kids the first time we met IRL, I'd laugh hysterically and brainstorm with you on how we can patent the idea and get it on the market ASAP.

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  10. I used to like scary movies and now the freak the frak out of me.

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  11. I was really looking forward to this movie then ended up being sooo freaking disappointed! I mean, there were parts that were scary, but I just didn't think it lived up to the hype. I did jump at the end though.....

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  12. My daughter saw it and didn't care for it, but my son saw it online with the original ending and said it was much better that way.

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  13. Oh I hate scary movies, takes me weeks to settle myself down so I can sleep again!

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  14. i heard that movie was so good!! i LOVE scary movies! maybe i can talk the hubs into watching it with me... hmmmm

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  15. Ok, I guess I'm a wimp because I saw this and it scared the pants off of me even though you didn't "see" anything. I also had to close my eyes at the very end...she tossed his body into the bedroom and then once she started walking that way with the blood everywhere, I had to cower in fear. I couldn't watch.

    I love scary movies, but I'm wimpy like that. And I, too, was very jumpy after I got home that night. Every little noise!!

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  16. I love that Tom was afraid for you to meet a perfectly lovely real live lady in the park but not afraid of the threat of demon commodes at all. That husband of yours has some weird priorities.

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  17. I want to see that movie but I am much to scared. I give you props girl.

    And I agree with you, toilets are very scary things!

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  18. I can't watch scary movies or they freak me out too. I refuse to even watch them, the only ones I've been made to see was when I wasn't in charge of movies and then I flipped out

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  19. I am one of those people who can talk to anyone, but I am a homebody too. Wish we were neighbors - I love your sense of humor!
    I love horror movies too and then freak out for the next day or two, yet I always go back for more. We must have some sort of sickness, huh? Masochism maybe? LOL

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  20. Egad!! This is why I don't watch scary movies. Ever. I'm afraid of Scooby doo.

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  21. I watched Paranormal Activity over the weekend also. I did not like the way it ended. The whole time I was sitting with my knees up to my chin so I could quickly tuck my head down if it got too scary but it was like it wasn't the scariest until the very end and then WHAM! And I didn't have time to hide my eyes. How did you like the attic scene? I yelled, "Don't go in there!" I embarrassed my family. =)

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  22. I'd totally put my kid in a muzzle. . . congrats on a new friend!

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  23. "I didn’t understand why the couple slept with the lights off. I’m sorry, but if I were being haunted by a DEMON GHOST I’d keep all the lights on." --- I bet they opened up all the closet doors, too.

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  24. Well... I wanted to see that movie... but now, maybe not... :S

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  25. Im that way too...like a kid that wants to cover their eyes with a blanket but just cant help but peek out...yeah that is so me!

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  26. Nope don't like scary movies and won't be seeing it.

    I do however relate to the internet friends. A girl i met on line flew to Boston to meet me then I flew to her place in the midwest. co workers are like, your "online friend" Yeah so? they don't get it. Her sister made her call so she knew I hadn't chopped her up.. lol.

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  27. I meet another mom friend oline too, through a moms group and when I was going to meet her for a Saturday morning run my husband FREAKED because he thought her and her husband were going to kidnap me for some strange sex trade or something, it was so ridcolous we still laugh about it!

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  28. You were supposed to wait and go see that with me!!

    Hmph!

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  29. I stopped watching scary movies a long time ago. My imagination oftentimes run wild.

    Nice post! :)

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  30. You post made me laugh....and cry. I like to see scary movies, too, even though they scare the bejesus out of me. I would always go with my best friend. She would laugh so hard at me when I'd yelp out loud in the theater, or grab her hand. Sadly, she passed away suddenly this past summer at the young age of 52.

    Anyway, I remember seeing the movie Halloween at the theater when it first came out. Now that was a classic. But, a man sat behind us WITH A HOOK for an arm. What are the odds of that happening? I swear to God, if he would have tapped me on the shoulder, even if it were innocent, to say something like, "Be quiet!" I would have peed myself!

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  31. i hate scary movies too!!!!! oh man.. IT ENDS LIKE THAT?? brilliant. lol

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  32. You post made me laugh....and cry. I like to see scary movies, too, even though they scare the bejesus out of me. I would always go with my best friend. She would laugh so hard at me when I'd yelp out loud in the theater, or grab her hand. Sadly, she passed away suddenly this past summer at the young age of 52.

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  33. I can NOT watch ghost movies. I watched a Japanese ghost movie in high school and had nightmares for two years. When those finally stopped...they made an American remake of it (which apparently sucked, but I didn't see it) The commercials were enough to make me really jumpy, even though I changed the channel every time they came on. Good for you for being brave enough to watch it.

    Oh, and I think muzzles for kids is a brilliant idea.

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  34. You are so the person I would like to go and see a scary movie with! I like watching scary movies with my husband, he jumps!

    And I swear you were talking about me in this post! I'm a shy hermit too...and don't let it all out until I get to really know someone also. Then you never know what I'm gonna say!

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  35. i loved the movie, even though it left me terrified of baby powder for like a week. and guess what? I've nominated you for a blogger award! come see it here: http://heatherchannel.blogspot.com/2009/11/blogger-awards-are-best.html

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  36. Oh...just thinking about that movie freaks me out. I'm a total wimp when it comes to scary movies.

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  37. I freak myself out after watching anything remotely scary. There is no way I could go see that one.

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  38. I want to see this movie, but I haven't yet convinced my husband to go along. A coworker said "Just go by yourself!" and I assured him that he was not equipped to give such a suggestion since he clearly wasn't all in on my paranoia. But I may have to. Then I'm not going to sleep for days.

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  39. Anthony and I went to see this movie on Halloween. I think he's still sleeping with the lights on!

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  40. I can't watch anything scary! I don't know how you did that. And I've met some kids that could use a muzzle....just kidding of course!

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  41. I don't do scary, so I've avoided that movie, but my daughter went and saw it. She didn't think it was all that scary. But, she's odd that way.

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  42. I NEVER see scary movies because I know that's exactly how I'd act. I am freaked out enough as it is :) I have an award for you. Please come by.

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  43. I love scary movies so much but am always so scared to go to the bathroom later...one time I saw my cat lying on the living room floor on my way to the bathroom and thought it was a naked man laying on my floor....I know that sounds crazy. That's what my hubby thought too when I ran upstairs screaming at the top of my lungs!

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  44. This is why I stick with romantic comedies. I can't handle scary movies AT. ALL. Kudos to you for being brave! :)

    ~Keri

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  45. I can't watch horror movies. I'm such a ninny and get terrible nightmares.

    However I have experience some "visitors" in my house and now believe.

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  46. I love horror movies - it's just a struggle finding a decent one.

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  47. Don't you hate it when the person you're talking to just doesn't GET your sense of humor? Children TOTALLY should come with muzzles!

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  48. Oh no! that is aweful. I don't watch movies like that because they scare me for days. I was in bubble for three weeks after watching Kingdom of the Spiders back in elementary school.

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  49. I really want to see that movie but I was afraid it would be like Blair Witch and not scary at all. Good to know it's scary!!

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