Wednesday, November 3, 2010

What Are You Wearing?

“Is that what you’re wearing?” Tommy said, his lip pulling upward in disgust.

I glanced down at the shirt I had on. It had an orange on the front with a glass of orange juice and the orange is looking at it going, “Mom?” I find it hilarious.

“Er...yes?” I answered. I was tempted to say something sarcastic like, “No, I just put it on for decoration,” but Tommy has Aspergers which means he takes everything literally. So had I said that, he’d have been all, “Decorations? Like Christmas?”

“Oh.” Tommy frowned.

“Is there a problem?” I asked impatiently. We were about ready to leave for his parent/teacher conference.

Tommy shuffled his feet. “It’s just, none of the other mothers wear shirts with fruit on it.”

That’s because they aren’t cool. I once saw one mother wear a collared shirt with a CARDIGAN tied around their neck. I thought only rich people did that on TV.

“It doesn’t really matter what I wear,” I insisted. I mean, my shirt could be worse. I have one that says “Save the trees, wipe your ass with an owl.” I’m smart enough to know that it’s not appropriate to wear in a school.

“It’s just, the oranges aren’t cool,” Tommy said primly. “The shirt isn’t cool. The glass of juice isn’t cool. The—”

I wasn’t about to stand there and be insulted so I cut in. “Hey, Randy Quaid, I get it. I’ll change.”

As I thundered up the stairs Tommy shouted, “Who is Randy Quaid?”

Parent/teacher conferences always make me a little nervous. I never know what the teacher is going to say about Tommy. In preschool it was mainly, “He won’t talk and he won’t sit during circle time. He prefers to do a dance.”

Well, sometimes I prefer to do a dance instead of sit.

Tommy and I waited outside of his classroom until the teacher called us back.

“Anything I should know?” I asked him.

“About what?”

“About...what the teacher might be telling me?”

Tommy opened his mouth to say something right as the teacher called us. Crap. What was he going to say? Was there a problem? When the teacher presented me with his report card and it had horrible grades on it, should I slam my fist down and screech, “I disagree!” Or should I sit there with a plastic smile on my face and mutter, “His grades are like this because he was dropped as a baby. My apologies.”

But it turns out I didn’t have anything to worry about. Tommy is doing great. His grades are mostly 3s (out of 4s), which means proficient. And his teacher raved how responsible he was. She did say that he got frustrated with his work sometimes and she’d notice tears in his eyes—so they are working on getting Tommy to raise his hand more and ask questions.

I relaxed a bit after I saw his report card.

“Great job, Tommy,” I said, as we walked back to the car.

“Your welcome.”

I bent down and kissed his cheek.

“Mom!” Tommy wiped it off while his eyes darted around the parking lot.

“Oh, come on, I can’t wear oranges on my shirt and I can’t kiss you? What’s with all these rules?” I griped as I unlocked the car.

Tommy slid into his seat. “I’m getting big now,” he said matter-of-factly. “Soon I’ll be nine. And then ten.”

“So I guess you’re getting too old for me to massage your head,” I said.

“Well. You can still do that,” Tommy responded grandly. “And if you really want, in private, you can call me your baby.”

My heart melted a bit. “Thank you, baby.”

52 comments:

  1. Personally I like shirts with oranges. And that was really sweet, he seems like a really good kid!

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  2. I just got teary when I read about you can call him "your baby"! SO sweet!

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  3. Awwwwwwwwwww so sweet, your baby! My "baby" is 14 and still gladly accepts massages and back scratches in exchange for allowing me to call him that. In private of course.

    Congrats on a great school report to Tommy!

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  4. I think that shirt sounds hilarious.

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  5. AWWWW - so sweet. I'm glad Tommy is doing so well in school! :) It sounds like he has a wonderful teacher too!

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  6. That last part was so sweet.

    My 9 year old just asked me yesterday if I would please not wear a faux hawk and my nose ring to her parent conference on Friday.

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  7. Aw! He really is growing up isn't he? But now it's got me concerned about my nephew. He is 11 yrs old and he still likes to sit on his mom's lap sometimes. *scratching my head*

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  8. That shirt sounds awesome. I would totally wear that!

    Yay for Tommy!

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  9. That IS a sweet story, but it left me wanting more. Like where to buy a t-shirt about wiping your ass with an owl. Come on, tell!

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  10. I think you should show up in crotchless leggings next time.

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  11. Aw, this really touched my heart! And, you know what? He will ALWAYS be your baby! My baby is 31 and my other baby is 29! How can that be when I'm only 40! Heh, heh!

    What a sweet, AND FUNNY post!

    Love, love, LOVE your T-shirts!

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  12. I think you ROCK as a mom. And he is a little sweetheart. I'd massage his head and call him baby as much as possible!!! And I love your Save the Trees T-shirt and the Oranges!

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  13. Awww... how sweet! Next time you should wear the owl shirt to see what kind of reaction you get.

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  14. Okay that warmed my heart for the day!! And if I was a parent, I wouldn't want to see people always dressing up for me. Just make sure to shower and brush your teeth, otherwise, show me a little style and fun! Well, maybe not the owl tee. lol

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  15. awww!
    in private huh??
    still so sweet!!
    glad tommys doing so well!!

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  16. AW! Glad he is doing well in school. I love how opinionated he is. Too funny!

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  17. Good to hear that Tommy's doing well in school. I didn't realize how relieving a good report is until my son didn't get one! Eek!

    I dread the "I'm too big for that" days. :(

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  18. At least he didn't project forward to his driver's license (they don't get to drive there at 10, do thay?)

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  19. Glad the conference went so well. And thank you for small favors and allowing "baby" in private. :)

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  20. That melted my heart! I think I would have laughed (in a good way) at your shirt if I was the teacher. That is funny!

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  21. Aww, that is heartwarming!

    What is it with boys and head massages? My husband loves it, and that seems to be the trick to get my fussy baby to sleep.

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  22. The t-shirt sounds fab and I would definitely wear it.

    My 7 y.o. isn't yet thinking he is too grown up for kisses and cuddles in front of his friends, but I suspect that by 8, it might be a different story. I better go cuddle him right now.

    Sweet story. Thanks!

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  23. Oh, wow. The "owl" t-shirt is hilarious!

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  24. Awwww. As long as you can still call him that in private, life is good!

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  25. totally got teary eyed when he said you could still call him baby. too cute! Good job with your grades, Tommy!

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  26. oh melt my heart.....

    Congrats to him on his grades.

    At least he still walks beside you on the way back to the car :O)

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  27. It's always a relief when the teacher raves about your kids. But it is sad when the kids start caring about how you dress and talk.

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  28. Soooo sweet! I like the shirt too!

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  29. First of all, I love the way you tell the story.

    That said...that was so sweet, "call him baby." I love that. 'Cause I'm really NOT looking forward to my babies growing up and not wanting me around. Boo!

    Glad he's doing well in school too.

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  30. Hee hee I have to know where you got your owl shirt, I so want one! Glad to hear Tommy is doing well in school!! :-) He is such a sweetie!

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  31. Okay, that is a SWEET story! And I'm glad he's doing well in school... sounds like he's getting good support there as well as from you.

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  32. Way to go Tommy!!!!

    Don't you love it when you have Parent/Teacher conferences like that?

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  33. Your son just made my heart melt.

    Well, first, he made me laugh, cuz I remember laying down clothing rules with my mom.

    But his last comment made my heart melt.

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  34. Awww this is sooo sweet...one of those proud Momma moments.

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  35. That is so sweet. And where can I find these super cool shirts you're sporting? lol

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  36. that is just about the sweetest thing i have read all week.

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  37. That is sweet! My kids aren't embarrassed of me yet but I'm sure it will come. What a sweet kid!

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  38. I have to know, what did you end up wearing? And aon't worry, when he's a teenager, it'll be your turn to say "are you going out dressed like that?"
    Good going at school, Tommy. Sounds like he's shaping up to be quite a genius.

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  39. He sounds so much like my oldest. I'm a little choked up. :)

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  40. I dread the day my girls tell me something I do isnt cool...its bound to happen!

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  41. oh and the owl shirt? Hilarious!

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  42. What a sweet post! Tommy is a lucky son and you're a lucky mom.

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  43. Fully expecting the day will soon come when my kid realizes that I'm not cool. So far I have her sussed. But that day's coming fast, because... oh... I'm not cool. At least by Tommyboy's standards because I'd proudly sport either one of those shirts. Great news on his report card and conference.

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  44. It's so damn hard when they grow up.

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  45. AWWWWW! You can call him 'baby!" AWWWWW!!! Funny, one won't wear what you tell her, and the other won't let YOU wear what you want to! Kids! I think it's great that you changed for no other reason than to make him happy. I think that's just about the sweetest thing ever...

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  46. AW.. That melts my heart. My 13, almost 14, year old son still likes to sit next to me on the couch & snuggle. I'm sure one day he will disown me if I admit it, but I'll take all the hugs he wants to give me.

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  47. Well, that was very generous of him to allow you the head massages and the "baby." I'm pretty sure my brother disowned all of us when he was 5.

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  48. awwwww... what a precious thing to say. Your writing captures the moment perfectly.

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  49. And that last bit...oh that's the good stuff.
    But I can't believe he didn't think that orange shirt was cool. I have seen (and coveted) that shirt and I think it is awesome.

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