Monday, February 21, 2011

I Love You. Most Ardently.

“I love you,” I said to Tom as we talked on Skype. “Most ardently.”

I thought he’d be moved. Instead he went, “What did you call me?”

I sighed. This is why it’s hard to be married to a man who doesn’t like to read. “I said ‘I love you. Most ardently.’”

“Did you make that up?” Tom stuffed M&Ms into his mouth. He’s obsessed with the candies.

“No, I didn’t make it up,” I replied. “It’s from Pride and Prejudice.”

I expected Tom to nod. I mean, hasn’t everyone heard of Pride and Prejudice? Instead he just chewed on his M&Ms and waited.

Pride and Prejudice,” I repeated.

“Sounds awful,” Tom finally answered.

If things aren’t blowing up, he’s not interested.

“Mr. Darcy says it to Elizabeth and I think—” I begin.

“What kind of name is Mr. Darcy?” Tom interrupted.

“I don’t know. Ask Jane Austen. Only you can’t, because she’s, you know, dead. Anyway,” I pressed on. “I’ve always wanted someone to say that they loved me. Most ardently.”

Tom shook his head. “I’m not doing it.”

“Why not?” I demanded. Honestly, it’s not like I ask a lot from him. I only request simple things: such as dressing up as Henry VIII on Halloween (he won’t, he says there is no way in hell he’s wearing tights), taking ballroom dancing lessons (he’d rather kiss a toilet), and saying romantic things. Like I love you. Most ardently.

“I won’t say it because first of all, I already forgot the word,” Tom admitted. “Absently, was it?”

He’s lucky he’s in Korea. Otherwise I’d have conked him over the head. I find it amusing that he can remember all of Megan Fox’s films but he can’t recall a simple word.

“Ardently,” I corrected.

“Whatever,” Tom said. “Second, I won’t say it because if I did, I’d have to beat myself up.”

“It’s okay to show emotions,” I snapped.

“True. But not that way,” Tom insisted.

“Well, fine. I love you. Most ardently.”

“Great. And I just love you.”

36 comments:

  1. My hubby and Tom sound like twins

    I have begged for any kind of dancing lessons.

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  2. Aww I love Pride and Prejudice. Mr Darcy is my ultimate fantasy man. Even if he is a bit stuffy and proud! Oh and movie wise I love Colin Firth Darcy! hehe

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  3. Nope theres no way my hubby would say that either. LOL!

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  4. I could probably get my boyfriend to say something like that. But he's the one into saying weird mushy things and I'm the one like "um, I just love you, okay?"

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  5. I have been waiting for years for my husband to say to me "you complete me".

    Years.

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  6. Lol - I couldn't imagine those words coming out of my husbands mouth - EVER. Ok, maybe I could get him to say them within those precious 5 minutes after you push a baby out - when they are just in awe. Then maybe he would love me, most ardently.

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  7. I don't think in all my life I've ever met a man who would say that... Or knows what it means. *sigh*

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  8. haha so cute -- my husband would roll his eyes at me for that too haha =)

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  9. LOL At least you got an I love you out of it!

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  10. Hahaha, great one! How it happens that we marry men who are our opposite?

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  11. i almost watched pride and prejudice today. the one with kiera. i still might. i'm in a romantic mood. then my lame ass husband will come home and ruin it.

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  12. My husband hates my obsession with P&P. He often makes fun of Mr. Darcy - to which I tease him that he knows who Mr. Darcy is.

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  13. At least you got an I love you... My kids get them all the time, but me? Only in times of crisis. I spend all my time making up crises so that I can get a bit of love around here.

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  14. He loves you ardently and absently, Amber. Chill.

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  15. Men! If I told my husband that he'd laugh at me. :)

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  16. My husband once told me he loved me more than the feeling he got when he farted after eating Mexican food.. isn't that lovely? ;)

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  17. This is such a silly exchange! And I think "I love you, most absently." pretty much would hit the nail on the head, neh?

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  18. This is such a silly exchange! And I think "I love you, most absently." pretty much would hit the nail on the head, neh?

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  19. Guys don't talk that way in real life.

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  20. I'm laughing so hard. I do love Ms. Austen, but I have to say "ardently" sounds kind of like work. Absently? Still laughing.

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  21. Maybe a more fitting response from him would have been, I love you more than M&Ms?

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  22. LOL, I doubt there are many men in this world willing to talk like Mr. Darcy!

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  23. Mr. Darcy is such a gem - his character sure did set the bar high.

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  24. Gah I wish to tap into your skype...Hee that sounded dirty and so not classy like Jane Austin

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  25. If you ever get him to say it make sure you record it for posterity.

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  26. You gotta love him! He's not going to change, either!

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  27. LOL I am most amused. That made me AND my hubby laugh.

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  28. wow... Pride and Prejudice is one of my favorite movie, its been almost a year since tha last time I watched it.. now hearing those words again, definitely will watch it tonight! :)

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  29. Well, at least he loves you, right??

    Now to make my husband say it....

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  30. My hubs would say it but he'd be laughing the whole time. He also might say he loves something else about me "most ardently"... TMI?

    Men.

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  31. I love little tidbits of stuff from you and Tom, it's like I'm there...

    but I'm not, that would be creepy~

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  32. Bahaha I love that he said he'd have to beat himself up. P&P is one of my favorite movies ever, and the book ranks high up there as well. Love love love!

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  33. The whole if I said that I'd have to beat myself up thing TOTALLY sounds like my husband. Whatever, how hard would it be to just play along once in a while right!

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