Wednesday, September 7, 2011

Thongs and Lederhosen

It bothered me.

I couldn’t seem to get totally comfortable.

“How can people wear these all the time?” I grumbled.

I was talking about a thong, people.

Why did I have a thong on?

Because I was going on a date with my husband. I finally found a babysitter through and I wanted to look nice. It’s not every day we get to go out without the kids.

Thongs suck though.

Still, I was able to focus on Tom. We decided on an authentic German restaurant. People walked around in Lederhosen. LEDERHOSEN! I loved it.

I even had wine. I’m not a wine person but I do enjoy German sweet wines.

I ended up getting this:

It was veal strips. Amazing. And I was able to enjoy it as soon as it arrived at the table. I didn’t have to worry about cutting up the children’s food. Or getting them ketchup. Or napkins. Or taking them to the bathroom. (Natalie thinks it’s funny to announce she has to pee right when our food arrives.)

I even concentrated on eating neatly. I have a bad habit of getting some sort of food item on my lap every time I eat. This time I cut my veal neatly, popped a tiny piece in my mouth and chewed in what I hoped was a demure manner.

We had the waitress take a picture of us:

I look silly because of the thong. I was like, “This thong is awful…oh, the camera is pointed at me.”

We even ordered dessert even though we were stuffed. But they were fried apples. Who can turn down fried apples?

I can’t.

Tom even fed me a bite—only his bite is like five times the size of mine so I nearly choked on it.

That wouldn’t have been attractive if he had to perform the Heimlich maneuver on our date.

And then the people in Lederhosen would have to help.

And what if my dress accidentally flipped up and everyone saw my uncomfortable thong?

Oh, the horror.

It was a fantastic night though.

I doubt I’ll ever wear a thong again.

People will just have to deal with my panty lines.


  1. The veal looks delish!

    And I'm glad you and Tom are together again!

  2. Sounds like a wonderful date, regardless of what underwear you had on :)

  3. You guys are so cute! And German food ... mmmmmmm ... that's one thing I really miss about living there. The food. *drool*

    Also, I hate thongs. So I just go commando. ;)

  4. I hate thongs with a passion! I just make people deal with my panty lines, or I go commando...way more comfortable under dresses! Glad you guys had a good date night though, and no choking on apples happened. :-)

  5. Thongs do suck. I found that nude colored underwear will usually eliminate the panty lines so I stocked up on those babies!

  6. There is a better way to eliminate panty lines than thongs. At least the celebrity columns discuss it all the time.
    Glad you had a quiet night out.

  7. My daughter thinks it's hilarious when I call my flip-flops thongs. That's what we used to call them darn it! What did you think of your sittercity sitter?? Did you go with the first one they found for you? :)

  8. Actually, the Hiemlich would have been appropriate in a German restaurant.

    The Cleveland Steamer would NOT.

  9. haha, thongs did take a while to get use to but it's pretty much all I wear now.

    You food looks delish!!! I am craving a fried apple, you're right, you can't pass that up!

    I'm glad you two were able to get a night out! :)

  10. Glad you two had a date. Thongs definitely take some getting used to though!

  11. What a lovely couple you are! Give yourself a pat on the back for taking advantage of your alone time. Now do it more often.


  12. victoria secret has wonderful microfiber underwear that has no visible panty lines through dress pants, so I imagine they would work well under dresses too!

    Glad you got a date night out with your hubby. :)

  13. Thongs were created by a evil evil man!!

    and the veal looks delish!!!

  14. Thongs are the devil! I used to wear them.. but I gave them up-- I'm married, I don't need to be sexy anymore ;) (Ha! My poor husband!!)

  15. I don't think a friend pie would even make me wear a thong!

    You look great, btw!

  16. I think you must have to wear them with a lot of regularity to get used to that feeling. I don't enjoy that sensation either.

  17. Glad you got time together. But you'll never catch me with a thong. Most uncomfortable thing...other than pantyhose or a bad bra.

  18. Love the picture of your date night and happy you are in the same country now...thongs not for me either....ouch just thinking about it.

  19. I hate thongs too. I never wear them very long ;)

  20. Oh no! I hate thongs! I'm not sure who decided it would be a good idea to have a permanent wedgie, but it was definitely a man! You look great though :)

  21. Lol. Too funny!! Thongs just take some getting used to. Lol. Yey for date night. My hubby & I are going out alone for the first time in over a year on Saturday, which so happens to be our anniversary. We're going to the Melting Pot :-)

  22. If I don't wear a thong, the underwear are usual up my butt anyways. So, it just wear one. At least it's supposed to be there.

    Glad to hear you and Tom got to enjoy some alone time. Were the kids perfect angels for the babysitter?

  23. The last time I was in New York City, we stopped at a restaurant near the village called Lederhosen. I had weinersnitzel(sp?) and it was delicious. My first experience with Bavarian food and I thought it was wonderful.
    As for the underwear, I tried a thong on once for about 5 seconds- no thanks! No idea how anyone could possibly find those things wearable.

  24. Who you have thong-hater followers. Fried apples with caramel?


  25. German wine is yummy! It's the one good thing about my husband getting sent to Germany all the time... He brings back wine:)

  26. So glad to know I'm not the only woman in the world who hates thongs.

    Those fried apples look amazing!

  27. See, you wear them long enough and then bikini underwear are just too much to deal with! Lol!

    German wine... I've only had it once, retired military neighbor brought some over... but oh my delish!


  28. I love me some thongs...I started wearing them in high school and have continued ever since - except while preggo because it felt like the babes were flossing with them! You get used to it...but it does kind of look like you're uncomfortable in the picture.


  29. Aw, you look totally beautiful. I see no wedgie face at all. Also: why is no one commenting on Tom's flamin' shirt/sunglasses at night hot date apparel? Dude's looking suave.

  30. I used to be an avid thong-wearer when I was about 1000 lbs lighter...I complained back, those things would just get lost in my physical abundance. LOL!!


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