Monday, February 13, 2012

Farro and Miso

“So, since you already have Valentine’s Day off, are you going to cook dinner?” I asked Tom. I love when I don’t have to cook. I hate cooking. If we were rich, we’d buy a cook. Well, you know, pay him or her to cook FOR us. Not actually BUY them.

“I already ordered you a present. Why do I have to cook?” Tom responded, furrowing his brow.

(I am incredibly impatient so I’m dying to know what my gift is. He won’t give me any sort of hint.)

“Well, in Redbook, some guy is making his wife Farro and Orange salad, Miso-rubbed rack of lamb with collard greens, and whiskey fudge,” I said matter-of-factly. I left out the fact that the guy was also a celebrity chef. And that I had no idea what farro was. It sounded like fart.

“A lot of that doesn’t even sound English,” Tom said, frowning. “What’s farro?”

Oh, crap.

“Farro is,” I began, behaving like I knew exactly what it was, “Farro is…a seed…that tastes like…um…a seed. A good seed.”

(I later learned that farro is some sort of grain. I hope Tom is never in a situation where farro comes up and he's like, "Oh, right, the seed!" and everyone looks at him like he's just admitted to having a crush on Margaret Thatcher.)

“I’ve never even heard of Miso before,” Tom mused, wrinkling his nose.

“It’s a popular spice,” I lied. (I think?)

“And I prefer chocolate fudge. Not whiskey fudge,” Tom pointed out.

Well. Actually, me too. Whiskey fudge did sound a little odd. Plus, I don’t even like whiskey. I tried it once and announced that it tasted like sick.

“I bet that guy making the food is some hot shot chef,” Tom said.

Crap. Busted.

“No. He’s just a regular guy wanting to impress his wife,” I fibbed.

“I’m taking you out to lunch. How about we just order a heart shaped pizza for dinner?” Tom suggested.

Most people might have balked at this. But…I do love pizza. I prefer real food as opposed to fancy foods with farro. I’ve never understood rich people food. It usually comes served on a plate—a circular tower of mashed up fish or meat and it’s surrounded by a green syrup to make it look pretty. Only it doesn’t, because the green syrup makes me think of snot.

Yeah. We’d never fit in with the rich crowd. Or those Real Housewives, who are forever throwing dinner parties and serving things like that. I’d be like, “Um. Can I have a burger? Without the green snot syrup around my plate?”

“A heart shaped pizza sounds good,” I agreed.

I mean, who needs Miso-rubbed rack of lamb anyway?


  1. Ha ha. I'm certainly not rich, but miso-rubbed lamb sounds delicious! A farro (think brown rice) and orange salad wouldn't be so bad either...

    BTW- miso usually comes in paste form. It's fermented soy I think? It sounds gross, but it is tasty (have you ever had miso soup at a sushi restaurant?).

  2. still sounds gross KT lol

    I like to get my teeth into my food and chew...and I like more than 2 mourhfils,so bo shmancy restraunts for me lol

  3. I prefer unfancy food as well. About 12 years ago we went fancy and spent over $100 on dinner out. Never again, that's just ridiculous. It was great but I am just as happy paying $30 for Thai food.

  4. Oh darling, I ADORE fancy food. But only if it's comp'd. If I have to pay for it, I am way too critical and the flavors just slip away.

    A dinner shouldn't cost more than $15 IMHO. Unless it's shellfish. YUM.

  5. I'd definitely say yes to a heart shaped pizza for dinner!

  6. The fanciest I get is a chicken dish at Red Lobster, because I don't eat lobster. A pizza sounds good.

  7. I am not a fancy food girl, I am way too picky of an eater for that.

  8. I haven't pizza in forever. so a heart shaped pizza would be awesome. :o)

  9. Oh I'm all about the heart-shaped pizza..even though, my husband is likely to try the Miso-reubbed rack of lamb o_O

  10. Ha! You make me laugh because I LOVE fancy food. :)

  11. Ha! We're also talking about doing a heart shaped pizza that night.
    (BUT Anthony is cooking lasagna for us the following Saturday. We're having guests come in and he's being sweet enough to cook so I can chill with them :-)

  12. Green snot.
    Ya, I agree.

    You are going WAY out. I'm not even doing the heart shaped pizza thing. I'm too stinkin' lazy.

  13. Fancy food makes me uncomfortable, like an imposter. Usually because I can't identify what's on my plate.

    I'll take pizza any day!

  14. Yep, I'd deal for a pizza any day of the week over the green snot stuff!!

    God bless and enjoy your evenin' with Hubs and his heart shaped pizza!!!

    Happy Valentine's Day sweetie!!! :o)

  15. Amen, sister! I wouldn't do well with the rich crowd either. Burgers and fries all the way (or pizza, of course . . . that goes without saying).

  16. hahaha too funny! enjoy your heart shaped pizza!!

  17. A heart-shaped pizza sounds lovely to me. And any guy who cooked me faro on Valentine's Day would NOT be getting any that night.

  18. Good call on the pizza. I'm the same. Heck, Corey asked what I wanted, and I told him I'd whack him if he wasted money on roses. I'd rather have it go toward a new outfit.

  19. I told my husband I would make him whatever he wanted for Valentine's Day for dinner. He asked for bacon sandwiches. Seriously.

  20. I would totally go for some heart shaped pizza. YUM!


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