I’ll be traveling to Hawaii on Monday.
That’s an eight hour flight. (Tom is like "eight hours? That's nothing. Try flying to and from Korea. That's 16 hours.") (Whatever. Eight hours is still long to me.)
I am not a fan of flying. But I always try to be considerate about it. It seems whenever I fly I get that one person around me that does the following:
--Announces that they hope we don’t die when we go through turbulence
My response: Stop it! Don’t SAY that because I already THINK it. I immediately believe the plane is going to split apart and we’re going to go plummeting towards Earth. This is why I play Lost, based on the TV show. I scan the passengers and decide which Lost character they’d be if we crashed. It helps relax me.
--Constantly have to get up to use the bathroom.
My response: if you have a weak bladder and can help it, DON’T SIT IN THE WINDOW SEATS. Get an aisle seat so you won’t keep irritating the people around you. I once had to sit in the middle seat and the chick beside me kept wanting to use the bathroom. I was fast asleep once, which is blissful for me when I’m on a airplane because then I FORGET I’M THOUSANDS OF MILES ABOVE GROUND and then she had to tap my shoulder and go, “I need to use the restroom.”
--Ignore screaming children
My response: My kids aren’t perfect. They’ve wailed a bit on airplanes. But I have stuff to quiet them. I ALWAYS buy new toys to distract them with. Or I bring the DVD player. I’ve noticed some parents just ignore their kid and will continue to play on their phone or read. I get that some experts say to ignore your child if they are throwing a fit. THIS DOES NOT APPLY TO AIRPLANES!
--Practically make out with their partner
My response: You might want to join the mile high club. If so, just do it but NOT in your seats. I don’t want to see a full makeout session. I witnessed this one time when I was flying with my kids. Do you know how embarrassing it is when your kid shouts, “Mommy! I saw his tongue go into her mouth. That can’t be healthy.”
--Keep talking to you even though it’s obvious that you want to read
My response: Look, if someone has a book out and keeps looking down at it, shut up. I’ll chat for a few minutes and then I’m done. If I can, I’d rather read. When I fly to Hawaii, the kids won’t be with me so that’s eight hours of reading time! If I get a chatty person beside me (husband will be on one side, the other is anyone’s guess..) I might have to go, “Shh. It’s reading time now.”
So yeah. Let’s all hope that I get a polite passenger beside me.
Have YOU experienced a rude passenger before?