Wednesday, July 25, 2012

An Important Lesson

“Now kids, while I have you both here, we need to discuss something important. The difference between your and you’re.” I paused, waiting for my offspring to look interested.

Instead they kept digging in the sand.

We were at the beach and their main goal was to make a sandcastle—not listen to me ramble.

“Anyway,” I continued, undeterred. “It makes Mommy cringe when someone writes ‘your welcome.’ Spelled Y-O-U-R. Can someone explain what is wrong with that?” I waited. Natalie filled her bucket with sand while Tommy used a shovel.

Hello? Spreaken ze English?

“Kids,” I tried again. “Never, ever write Y-O-U-R welcome. It’s Y-O-U-APOSTROPHE-R-E. When it comes time for you to have Facebook or whatever is in at that time, do not, I repeat, do NOT do the Y-O-U-R welcome thing. You promise?”

“Can I just build this?” Tommy snapped.

“I like saying you’re welcome. It’s manners,” Natalie piped up sweetly.

I’d just have to keep drilling it in their heads. Along with a bedtime story I’d come up with a chant—a song, maybe, on the difference between your and you’re. I’d—wait. What in the world?

A van pulled up behind us. I stared as a bunch of women climbed out of it. Many were wearing large hats.

The van said this on the sides AND the back. I guess the women really wanted to get their point across.

(This picture was taken the next day. Naturally it was parked right beside our truck...)


Were the women hoping to find Christian Grey in the condos we were staying at? I hope they didn’t find him. That would be some very loud sex and I was not in the mood to listen to—

“Ha, ha, let’s go make some cocktails!” one of the women shouted.

Oh no. A rowdy bunch. Looking for Christian Grey.

I never did find out if they discovered him on the beach.

I hope not.

I feel like I might be the only women who doesn't get his allure. I'd have been gone right after I was handed a contract.

But that's just me.


  1. You are NOT the only woman who doesn't get it! I find the whole idea of him to be super, super creepy. Since when did an emotionally disturbed man who enjoys abusing women become our Prince Charming (contract or no contract!)? No thank you!!

  2. I liked the book but do not understand the cult following of it. its just another love/sex story.

  3. I'd leave after the contract came out too.

  4. You had me startled for a long minute there in the beginning, Amber! I don't know where my mind is, but I thought you were about to give them the BIG talk about the difference between a boy and a girl. And I was thinking, what the heck, in a public place like on the beach?!

    I haven't read the books, but I know enough to know who Christian Grey is, and I don't think I'd be one iota interested in him. NOT my scene...

  5. I had to google search Christian Grey for a photo. Just so I could see who the heck they were searching for. Guess he is not on my radar!

  6. I can't even read past the first chapter of the book. I think if I saw that van, I'd have just laughed.
    My own husband is famous for the your welcome, which hurts my fingers to type.It drives me bonkers!

  7. Grammatical and spelling errors make me crazy! Also, this whole 50 Shades thing is just silly.

  8. I don't even understand that van! 50 Shades was difficult to read... I stopped 1/3 of the way into the book. If she can get published, why can't I?

  9. Being a Latin teacher makes me somewhat of a grammar nazi. And apparently I am raising one, too. She doesn't just inwardly cringe like I do, she gets loud and belligerent :-)

    And then on the opposite end of the spectrum, I enjoy reading smut. And even badly written smut. Including 50 Shades. But I would certainly not want to look for him while on vacation. Or any other time. :-)

  10. Haven't read Shades of Grey, don't particularly have an interest either :) But dang, all over the van? That's about as bad as gangs of Twilight fans roving around.

    I love that you're starting early on the grammar issues. I should start this with my child, as she's only a few years away from Facebook age!

  11. I have a coworker who uses thankyou, just like that, one big word. It makes me crazy. Just as does the whole your/you're thing, and the use of the pronoun I when me is grammatically correct. Ohh, just don't get me started.

    And that van? Hysterical in a sad, sad sort of way. Christian Grey is not my type either. Not. At. All.

  12. This may not be a grammar thing - but I cringe when someone responds to "thank you" with "no problem" The correct response is "you'RE welcome"

    Emphases on the 'RE. (ha)

  13. I'm so glad to hear that I'm not the only girl who is not in awe of Christian Grey and yes I admit it I have absolutely no desire to read the book either. wew that felt good to let out. :) I hope you're having a wonderful day!

  14. There's a lovely discussion on my Facebook page about how bad the 50 Shades of Grey book is. What is wrong with people? But if you look up the book on Amazon, the one star reviews are very entertaining and since there are almost as many of them as 5 star reviews, at least we aren't alone in our bewilderment. I'd have made very rude remarks that the van ladies would probably have overheard. That's just how I roll.

    And, as an editor, I'm somewhat OCD about grammar, or the lack thereof. I sometimes comment on my daughter's FB statuses when she spells incorrectly or uses poor grammar. It really pisses her off.


  15. Oh I'm all in a panic over how I most often write "you're welcome." I feel like I do it correctly, but what if I don't always? Yikes!

  16. I laughed at all of this, and I am sure I mess up you're and your when I am in a if you see it in any of my post I am so sorry!

  17. you are definitely not the only woman that isn't feeling it. This girl right here has no interest, what so ever!


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