So I mentioned that I went to a marriage retreat with Tom.
I liked it.
We got to go to classes and there was childcare PLUS there was a date night on Saturday.
We did learn some beneficial things.
Here is basically a sum up:
We had to guess what the other’s love language was at one point.
“You like gift giving,” Tom said without hesitation.
“No! It’s not all about gifts!” I argued.
“But you like getting gifts,” he prodded.
Well, duh. Who doesn’t?
“But I prefer quality time or physical touch,” I insisted.
“Yeah you do,” Tom responded, wiggling his eyebrows up and down.
It’s hard for us to take that kind of thing seriously. I remember when the book Love Dare came out and everyone around us seemed to be doing it. We couldn’t take the questions seriously. For instance, if I were asked to name a good quality about him, I’d say, “He doesn’t fart in bed that often.”
Somehow I don’t think that’s what the book is looking for…
When we had to answer the questions, we had to sit knee to knee and look into one another’s eyes.
This gave us the giggles.
Who talks like that?
The woman hosting the class even suggested that we sit knee to knee and eye to eye when we returned home.
Uh. No thanks.
We talk like normal human beings. I can see her point though. If you sit like that, the odds that someone will shout will go down because, well, it’s hard to scream at someone who is against your knee and staring you right in the face.
Not for us.
We also don’t speak to one another like the paper suggests. I don’t go, “When you play your video games for hours on end, I feel pissed off because you ought to pay attention to human beings rather than make believe things.”
Instead I go, “If you don’t stop playing that game, I’m going to chuck it out the window.”
Probably not healthy.
But the class did teach me to say things in a better manner. Tom did admit that he doesn’t much like it when I threaten to break parts of his body or his belongings.
So I’m working on it.
He’s working on communicating better with me.
I highly recommend a marriage retreat if your area offers one. I swear, you’ll do fine if you’re like me, who can’t take much seriously. It still helps.