They were beautiful words.
Cookie Dough Oreos.
Marshmallow Crispy Oreos.
I had to try them.
Some people found them in grocery stores and would post about it on Facebook.
I became jealous.
Why couldn't I find the cookies?
The reviews on the cookies weren't always the greatest. Some people said the cookie dough flavor tasted like sweet mush. The marshmallow crisp tasted nothing like marshmallow crisp. But I didn't care. I had to try them for myself.
I was tempted to write to Nabisco:
"Please send me the cookies! I will write a review on my blog!"
I was in the beautiful land of Target and I wandered into the cookie aisle. There were two women about my age standing in front of the Oreo display.
"These are the marshmallow crispy ones I keep hearing about," one of them said to her friend. She grabbed two.
There was only 1 package left.
"Mine!" I said, tugging the last package of cookies to my chest. "I need this more than you."
Okay, so I didn't do that. I wanted to. I sort of stood awkwardly to the side, hoping the other lady wouldn't take the last package.
"You getting one, Claire?" the woman said, setting the two packages in her cart.
Claire, please no. No, Claire. I tried telepathy.
Claire wrinkled her nose and went, "No. I shouldn't." She patted her flat stomach. "I don't need that junk."
Junk! Junk! They weren't JUNK. They were beautiful cookies!
I grabbed the last package before she could change her mind. Sorry, Claire. Mine.
Okay, so I found marshmallow crispy. Now I needed the cookie dough. My friend texted me saying she found it at WalMart. But..WalMart frightens me.
It was okay though.
A few days later I was BACK at Target, because I have a Target problem (Hi, I'm Amber, and I'm a Target-holic. (Hi Amber)) and the cookie dough Oreos were THERE! Yes! I grabbed that package and held them up in the air like they were Simba. I swallowed back the urge to shout, "BEHOLD!"
Back at home, it was time for the taste test. I waited to try the marshmallow crisp because in my mind, I believed I had to try them together. I mean, not at the same TIME, but next to each other. It just felt right. So I carefully peeled back the marshmallow crispy, picked up a cookie in a dainty manner, and took a tiny bite as if I were some important food critic.
(It occurs to me now that a vlog would have been smart. But I've never done a vlog. My face is pretty pale and I worry I'll scare people.)
The marshmallow crisp tasted like a Rice Krispy treat. And yes, there are flakes of marshmallow crisp in the cream:
I was impressed. I ate three more and then remembered I still had to try the Cookie Dough Oreos.
It almost pains me to type this.
The cream sort of tasted like coffee to me. I don't like coffee. So it was like a chocolate/coffee flavor and I just...I wasn't impressed.
Listen, I consume TONS of cookie dough. I've bought the tube of cookie dough before simply to eat it. My husband makes chocolate chip cookies and I stuff my face with the dough. So I KNOW cookie dough. I mean, salmonella be damned.
The cookie dough in the Oreos was NOT proper cookie dough.
My final verdict?
Marshmallow crispy? Yum!
Cookie dough? Blagh!