Friday, February 21, 2014

Please Don't Let My Daughter To Turn Out Like This

I have a little girl.

A loud one.

A feisty one.

Sometimes when I watch TV, and let's be honest, I watch a lot of TV, I worry about what she's going to be like when she's older.

I worry that she might be overly peppy, like Sue Heck in The Middle:


I wouldn't be able to take it! I'm all for someone being happy, but Sue takes it too far. And if Natalie did that first thing in the morning? I'd want to toss the cereal box at her head.

I also get paranoid that she'll turn into Jenelle Evans from Teen Mom.


Jenelle has all sorts of problems. She popped out a baby and her mom raises it. Natalie better not think she's going to hand over her infant to me. I'd hand it right back. Okay, that's a lie. If it were my grandkid, I'd have to keep it. Jenelle also does drugs and winds up in jail a lot. Her priorities are all messed up. Oh, and she's having ANOTHER kid even though she doesn't properly care for her first one.

But then, what if she's a Haley Dunphy from Modern Family?



Haley isn't that bright. Some of the things that fly from her mouth make me go ?? What if Natalie makes me go ?? as she gets older. Sometimes she says startling things NOW such as, "Why do we have ears?" or, "Sometimes life was easier when I had diapers," or, I asked her if she brushed her teeth the other day and she said, "I just ate a Thin Mint, my breath won't be stinky."


Occasionally at night my eyes will suddenly go wide and I'll wonder in a panic, "What if Natalie follows a serial killer like Emma in The Following?"


Source


Seriously, this girl thinks a serial killer is like a King. A SERIAL KILLER who has murdered multiple women. Isn't she worried he'll, I don't know, murder HER someday? I guess not because she does whatever he says. However, Emma came from a bad family. Natalie doesn't have a bad family. She has a loud family, but not a bad one.

So phew. No Emma. But...but...suppose...just suppose she loses her mind entirely and becomes like this:


I couldn't take it. I'd wonder where I'd gone wrong. Yes, I can have a temper, but I never flipped a table! I never paid for furniture with a wad of cash. I don't walk around in bedazzled clothing!


Please, for my sanity, let Natalie turn out okay.

Don't let her be peppy, lazy, ignorant, frightening, or insane.

(I'd love her either way though.)

(I'd be slightly AFRAID. But I'd love her either way.)




38 comments:

  1. This might be my favorite post I've read all week! haha....please don't let our Stella turn out like any of these characters either!!
    Eva Marie

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  2. Natalie is going to turn out AWESOME (because she already is! The Thin Mint comment is awesome!!)If I had to pick one of these characters for Lucy, I'd totally pick with Sue Heck! She is truly happy and nothing gets her down! (But I ADORE that show and love every single character...so I am totally biased!) --Lisa

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  3. The good thing is the most human beings turn out far better than sitcom characters or reality tv people.... haha!

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  4. i have the same thoughts and worries about my daughter...never had those type of worries with my son, but my daughter, oh my!

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  5. I worry about this with my girls too. I tell my teenager all the time, if you came home with a babym you get to raise it. I'd help but dont tell her that

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  6. Natalie is going to be her own sweet person - she already has such a great personality. And, personally, I think the Thin Mint comment is more brilliant than anything!!!

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  7. I'm giggling at the last video with the lady trying to upturn the table. I can read lips really good and the fact she is yelling "You Bitch!!!" just tickles me. I love it when I can read bad words :) I think she was saying "Because you're fucking sick, you bitch!" or something like that. The little things make me giggle.

    As for Natalie... I have a strong feeling she is going to amaze you. Yes she will irritate you no matter what she does because well, its just the way it is supposed to work, but she is not going to turn out a wacky in a way you cannot handle.

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  8. hahaha thats funny... oh lord I have boys think of the possibilities

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  9. I keep thinking things similar to this about when my son grows up, ha ha. I hope he grows up to be normal :D Ha ha!

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  10. Well now you've made me glad I only have boys.

    Seriously though, this was hilarious! Thanks for making my morning.

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  11. No guarantees! My daughter is almost 20 and she still changing....I'll take peppy over shoulder shrug and no expression....but Sue Heck takes it too far!

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  12. This is way too funny. I think my kid will end up like sue heck. Over the top cheerful and geeky that makes you want to body slam them into a wall. Oh, geez. At least it's better than turning out like Janelle. Anything over Janelle.

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  13. That Thin Mint comment is epic. I'm sure Natalie won't turn out like any of these nutty girls--she's got YOU raising her after all, and it sounds like you're doing a pretty kick-butt job

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  14. I have two stepdaughters, and I worry a lot how they will be when they get older. I want them to be smart, funny, independent, loyal, and focused on doing what is right, no matter what anyone else is telling them to do. Now that I think of it, I wish the same things for my stepsons. It does seem like kids growing up right now have some horrible media characters and so-called role models to overcome.

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  15. I don't think you'll have to worry about Natalie being an airhead. She seems to have a very acute attention to detail and even if her questions are a little weird she's at least analyzing the world around her.

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  16. I worry about such things too. especially as my daughters were bouncy all over the place clamoring for my attention while I was trying to watch the Canada vs USA hockey game. (um, sorry.) I mean really...how unpatriotic!
    Quite honestly, Emma scares me much more than Joe. Hell hath no fury like a woman scorned, and Emma is gonna cut that new blonde chick something fierce when she finds out!

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  17. Omg DYING over the Jenelle pic. I remember watching this episode and wondering if she could hear herself speak. I don't know how her lawyer didn't punch her directly in the face.

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  18. Oh dear.
    Please not Jenelle. That girl, I just have no words!

    I think about this all the time as I watch my little girl grow and change. It's mysterious and terrifying!

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  19. Yep, we love them "no matter what" -- and I for one am thankful that there a few people loving me "no matter what" too!!!

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  20. Oh my gosh, this is hilarious!! Sadly, I can relate. I have a very "peppy" 10 year old boy. I just have to keep reminding myself that he'll probably (hopefully!) grow up to be a successful adult!!

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  21. Aww..she WILL be ok. She will!
    And Haley from Modern Family is getting better. She found out she's amazing at photography! I like her lately. It's Alex I worry about..

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  22. I had a brief time of fear for my oldest daughter. I can't STAND my kids' stepmother and I was so afraid she'd rub off on them; she's one of these who's fake-super-nice to your face and stabs you in the back as soon as your back is turned.
    Thank GOD, my girls are nothing like her. They are the opposite of fake and they are quick to tell you how the REALLY feel. Like their Mama!!
    I can't stand Jennelle, ugh, her poor kid(s).

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  23. Gosh I hear you. My crazy kid could end up, well, crazy.

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  24. Janelle is a hot hot mess!!! omg!

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  25. Such a funny post! I have two teenage daughters and they are just awesome despite my parenting skills. lol! Coming over from #sitssharefest

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  26. I totally hear you! I don't have girls, but I worry about how my son could turn out. Hopefully, he will not end up on reality television, ever, for any reason:) My post this week is actually kind of similar to yours. It's called How To Raise a Man. I'd love it if you would come check it out:) http://www.mommyhooddom.com/2014/02/how-to-raise-a-man/

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  27. I imagine that every momma goes through a similar thought process. Lord knows there were times when my parents worried about me A LOT. I was young and stupid and thankfully they allowed me to realize that every action has a reaction and I *think* it's the reason I'm relatively level-headed now.

    You are a great mom and your daughter will be just fine. Even if she flips a table every now and then :)

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  28. LOLOLOL!!!! I am terrified also, but, here's the thing, our babies, feisty and opinionated do know right from wrong and know how far they can push before Momma goes bonkers, I think you and I will both be fine, my friend! XO! ~A~

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  29. If we aren't screwing up or kids in some way then we are doing something wrong. lol

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  30. She will turn out awesome! :) Loved this post!

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  31. Even Sue Heck's parents don't know what to think of her. Although I think she is the best of the choices you posted.

    I am sure Natale will be fine, and the best dressed at the same time

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  32. My daughters are 15, 19, 20, and 23. I think they are pretty much how they are going to stay and it's awesome! My son is 17. He's awesome, too. But my fear is what kind of girl he will choose. I will have to love her, but I hope it's not too hard. What if she's one of those scary girls you mentioned? Eeek!

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  33. I am right there with ya! And sometimes I hope that my daughter will turn out just like me. Then again, sometimes I worry that she will turn out just like me!!

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  34. I'm not worried about my son ending up on a reality show, but I AM a little worried about him ending up like Sheldon Cooper from Big Bang Theory. He has both a cousin and a friend who are like that, so it isn't that far-fetched. However, I think they all end up to be their own unique and somewhat wonderful people. #SITSSharefest

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  35. parents worry about everything. BUT I don't think you will have to worry about Natalie. She's doing just fine so far! Good job, mom!

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  36. "Sometimes life was easier when I had diapers" hahaha....that's hilarious. Natalie...so entertaining =)

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  37. Ha Ha this is just too funny but I can see what you mean. I don't think I could manage if Cat turned out like any of them either.

    But, I don't think you or me have anything to worry about (yet) :)

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