Friday, September 19, 2014

I Look Scary In My Military ID Card





We had to get ID cards last week.

For those who don't know, you need an ID card to get on a military base.

It looks like this: (Well, mine does. Tom has a white one since he's the Active Duty member.)


If you don't have one, you don't get on base.

You'll be asked to leave.


Source


Tom made an appointment for us at 8. You want an appointment. Otherwise you could be waiting a long time. 

When you get new ID cards, you have to take new photos. You all know I'm not a morning person, so I looked frightening. 

Tom always looks like he's about to kill someone in his photos.


He's like, "In military photos, you can't SMILE." 

I know. But don't look like you're a follower of Jeffrey Dahmer. I mean, geez. 

I probably should have put on makeup for my photo, but I was like, "Too tired. Cannot lift hand to put on eyeliner."

The ID lady was nice though. She was like, "Um. Your hair is sticking up." And she waved a hand over the entire general area on top of her head.

Meaning my hair probably looked like this:


I flattened it down and smiled. 

So how did my picture come out?

Oh, let me show you:


Next time?

I should put on makeup. 

28 comments:

  1. This is great!! I always try to sneak a smile in, but it causes me to look crazy. I did make up and hair last time, but it didn't help since it's a shitty black and white photo.

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  2. I hate the way I look on photos and have to make a conscious effort to smile. Usually I am not in the mood to smile for official photographs. And I entered military base once with my passport as my mother-in-laws +1. They usually do all the grocery shopping there.

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  3. HA HA HA HA!! Cracking up at the final picture reveal! ;)-The Dose Girls

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  4. HaHa - did the ID lady really do the hair thing?!
    It is so much easier to get our IDs at the base here (Guard is much more relaxed!!!).

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  5. I despise getting a new ID! I always think I'm smiling, but I inevitably look like I'm smirking & sniffling at the same time. Plus, the camera always adds at least 20 pounds on me. Needless to say, not photogenic. No wonder the gate guards always do a double take; I think they think I must've stolen someone else's ID.

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  6. haha! You tease. I thought you'd really show us. This is hilarious. I looked like a criminal in my driver's license for years.
    Finally I just smiled.

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  7. Hahaha! Great pic! I hate getting my ID pic taken. And now they have this new rule in my state that you can't smile with teeth- so ridiculous!

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  8. Hahaha! I hear you on this!I just took my drivers license photo and it looks more like a mug shot than an id.

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  10. HAHAHA when I had mine done my husband had been gone for about a month to BMT. This was my first experience on a base and it was just too much! I saw a young man in uniform that looked like him and just started bawling.. then the man took my picture. And, I looked like a puffer fish. All in a day's work!

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  11. Hee hee - sounds like my driver's license photo. My husband always looks scary in his pictures too - and he's not in the military! Have a great weekend!

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  12. hahhaaa! I am definitely enjoying the portrayal of how you looked in your new photo. Then if it's a photo that looks good there is some reason a new one needs to replace it.... which ends up being not so hot.

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  13. HAHAHAHA oh my gosh I laughed so hard. This is awesome. Thank you for stopping by my blog. So glad to find yours! Look forward to reading more. - Heather, Life of a Traveling Navy Wife

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  14. Haha! For some reason all my "serious" papers have extremely unserious pictures. I either smile too much and lean my head like i am seeing a baby kitten or look like i am part of a terrorist cell! In my id i am 14! Really!

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  15. HAHAHAH HATE ID card picture time. My active duty pictures looked like yes, I was about to slay someone. And then when I became a dependent and left AD, my dependent IDs looked like I had no business being on a military post. Ever.

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  16. This is too funny! I have one ID picture in particular that looks like a mugshot.

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  17. I hate how I look in 90% of ALL photos... but IDs are definitely the worst - what's up with that?!

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  18. I love this so much!! I have one ID where I look like a Russian bodybuilder, and my most current is zoomed in so close to my face it's a freaking joke.

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  19. Oh my goodness, my Id is terrible. Every one I have ever had was just wrong... One I was laughing and it looked like my face was deformed!

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  20. I always look absolutely horrendous in my id card picture. I'm okay with that. I take pride in my horrible photo :)

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  21. This is hilarious!! I'm sure you don't look as bad as you think you do! They need to start investing some money on photoshopping on these ID's : )

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  22. I hate not being able to smile in pictures! I am almost always smiling in real life, so why can't I look happy in a photo!?

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  23. Haha! That's like your drivers license photos too. You get one chance to take a picture that you're stuck with for 8 years. One year I had a decent picture and I was so bummed when it expired and I had to get another one. The next one looked terrible.

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  24. No one ever manages to look good in those ID cards. I can't even recognize myself in the ones I had.

    except the one I had for my college dorm. I was totally and miserably hung over and stood in line forever - and I swear it's the best picture I've ever taken. I kept it.

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  25. I went to get my driver's license renewed this month for the first time in years. Here, we have to prove citizenship now (don't know if everybody does?) So I couldn't renew online and had to show utility bills and stuff like that to prove that I am allowed to be here. It took forever but I was so glad to be done. Then I got a letter saying that my hair is overy eye in my picture and I have to retake it! Ugh. I'll go back next week but I don't waaaaannnna!

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    Replies
    1. That would be nuts! I've never had a prove citizenship--I guess that's new.

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  26. Oh man!!! Just got mine renewed.......I look SO different they actually look at it, look at me, look at it again......one time I said “Listen SGT if I was going to try and use someone’s card to get on base- I think I would’ve chosen someone else”

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