Monday, April 11, 2016

This Is Tommy (A Story Of A Boy With Autism)







This is Tommy.



When he was small, he'd make piles of shoes around the house.



This is Tommy.



He used to have a string that he named Bing. Bing went everywhere with him for a while.


This is Tommy.


He loved to stack his Mega Bloks as well as staking the shoes. If they fell over, he'd flip out.



This is Tommy.



I knew from the very beginning that he was going to be incredible. I could see it in his expression. I used to think, "Why would I be given a child with special needs when I was only a child myself?" (I had him at nineteen.) But I was given Tommy for a reason. I know I was.



This is Tommy.




When he started Kindergarten, he was overwhelmed and had many meltdowns. I received phone calls almost daily about them.


This is Tommy.


An IEP is what helped him calm down in school. When teachers knew how to help him, things went better. He still has issues, but not as many as before.



This is Tommy.



Now that he's in middle school, he's pretty quiet in school, and doesn't have a lot of friends.



This is Tommy.



He might be quiet at school, but he will communicate when playing video games. He even has his own Youtube channel.


This is Tommy.



And he's happy he's not a girl.



This is Tommy.



When he's not playing video games, he'll sometimes draw. He's better at it than I ever was.


This is Tommy.



He's a good big brother even though he says his sister is too loud for him. But he does say he loves her "a little bit."



This is Tommy.


And for a while, one of his obsessions was learning about the weather. He could tell you anything about the clouds.


This is Tommy.



He probably will never go to any of his school dances, but it's okay, because I'll dance with him.




This is Tommy.


He's amazing. And smart. And fabulous.

And if you let him.


He could be the best friend you ever had.




126 comments:

  1. I love this Amber...so so much. Drew is a few years younger and one thing that really helps me is moms like you with older kids who have Asperger's. It helps so much to see what they are doing and what they are like at an older age. That is so cool he has a You Tube channel :)

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  2. This is amazing!! I think anyone who's not his friend is totally missing out. Xxoo

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  3. Such a wonderful tribute! My son will be 5 next month, and he has asperger's too. I worry so much about him, it's so nice to read about kids like him. Brayden also thinks his sister is too loud for him 😃

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  4. what a great post! I have a son who has a 504 form, which is the next step down from an IEP. I have been so grateful for it, and kicked myself for not exploring it sooner. but its hard isn't it. Figuring it all out. My son is going to check out Tommy's youtube..and will probably instantly want to be his friend, LOL!

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    1. Awesome, I hope he enjoys Tommy's channel. He loves to post on it.

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  5. He's a very wonderful boy. You can just tell all the time. And Bing! I love that!

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  6. He is an awesome guy!! :) I love this post.

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  7. he sounds like one awesome kid!! a privilege to know, i'm sure of that.

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  8. Tommy is awesome! And he has an awesome mom and family. I like learning more about autism through posts like yours. I think every kid has challenges and we should be kind and informed about them if we can.

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  9. Aww! So sweet! Tommy sounds like such a neat kid!

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  10. Tommy sure is something wonderful and special! I have a great-nephew who has Aspergers, and I love him dearly. He has a gentleness especially towards younger kids and animals that brings tears to my eyes every time I see it. Kids with autism might have some mannerisms that other kids and many adults don't understand, but they also have some amazing qualities, if you just take the time to get to know them.

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  11. What a wonderful tribute to your son. And, I was wondering, since I googled IEP, and that tells me that he is on record with autism, if you could qualify for the same type of housing as you have now, based on the exceptional family member program? It would be such a small concession for the military to make.

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  12. Oh Amber your Tommy is sweet! That dancing picture is so cute and yes my son is grateful as well that he is also not a girl for the very same reason.

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  13. I have a daughter who has high functioning autism spectrum disorder. She is smart, funny, loving and kind. I think Tommy is amazing, all asd are amazing and brave!

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  14. I always appreciate the posts about Tommy, I think you are doing a good job in raising awareness and educating.

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  15. This is a wonderful tribute to him. It's awesome that you talk about him and his autism and are working to foster an understanding of autism.

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  16. I'm with all the other ladies, what a special tribute. Had me almost in happy/proud tears. I'm such a freaking sap!
    LOL at his look of horror at the period pamphlet!!

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  17. Happy he isn't a girl. LOL! That face is so precious! This made my day ;)

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  18. Fantastic post! Your son is amazing.

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  19. Beautiful post. Tommy seems like an awesome young man, and you're the perfect mom for him :)!

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  20. This really touched me, what an amazingly beautiful post, Amber... He's definitely an amazing guy!!

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  21. You need to send this to The Mighty. I consistently love your autism posts because they aren't really about autism at all, they're about an awesome kid who also happens to have autism.

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  22. This is a fantastic post! Tommy sounds like an amazing kid and he will do great things.

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  23. Aw I have tears! What an amazing gift, he is! You are a wonderful mom obviously!

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  24. Tommy reminds me so much of my brother! I've been reading your blogs/open diary since he was itty bitty and just watching him grow is amazing. I want to give you props as a mom, just as my mom did you let your son be who he is. My brother is now married and has a son of his own. It's amazing what can happen!

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  25. this is so sweet, it made me tear up a little bit. He's incredible, and you are such a good Mommy and friend to him!!!!

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  26. Amber, you have me crying! That picture of the two you in front of the tree and your sweet words.
    You're such a sweet and caring mama with an awesome young man.
    XOXO

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  27. Amber this is an AWESOME post about an AWESOME boy!

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  28. I LOVE this post! Tommy is such an individual and it's so fun to get to now more about him.

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  29. This is such a great post! Tommy is so lucky to have you as a mom and you are lucky to have him as a son.

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  30. Oh, wow. You hit me with all the feelings today. He is very lucky to have you as a mom!!

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  31. I love this! thank you for sharing your family with us.

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  32. Of course I don't know Tommy personally, but I think he's a pretty cool guy :) I think he'd get along well with Jayce, too. Jayce used to be obsessed over the weather when he was in Kindergarten. His teacher was convinced that he was going to be a meteorologist. Now, in 5th grade, he wants to be a computer programmer.

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  33. Thanks for introducing me to Tommy! Would you be interested in writing a guest post for my site? Maybe we could reciprocate? www.gobeyondautism.com

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    1. Sure, just let me know more details! Do you have a specific post idea in mind? Thank you!

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  34. Well Tommy sounds awesome and you seem to be an amazing parent! I really enjoyed reading this story. Parenting is not easy at all but oh so wonderful!

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  35. It's incredibly heart-warming to see Tommy grow and turning into a sensible boy :) Loved his childhood pics with innocence written all over his face.

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  36. Such a great piece! I cried when I read the last line. I have a son with special needs in 4th grade. He craves social interactions but can't seem to make connections with the typical kids because of his differences. For now, I am also his dancing partner and his best friend. Its heartbreaking for me to see him on the outside all the time. Tommy looks like an incredible kid and is lucky to have such a great mother!

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  37. Aw. Sweet Tommy! I love these pics so much. And you're such a great Mom.

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  38. I love your post! My son is autistic and does a lot of things like your son, Tommy. This is very heartwarming to see and read about your son. He is lucky to have a great mom like you!

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  39. OMG I cracked up when I saw his face looking at that period pamphlet. LOL! What a gorgeous kid, and what a loving mom! He's lucky to have you!

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  40. I do hope from all my heart that Tommy will go to a school dance and that his colleagues will be kind to him. I do hope that he will go to uni and that he will make friends who will love him exactly for who he is, for his special character and kindness.

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  41. What a touching post. Made me laugh out loud too! I feel like I know Tommy already.

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  42. Tommy is awesome and I love the story that you shared it is really Heartwarming! Autism awareness is Important. Many of the stories you shared remind me of my sweet little sister

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  43. Aww, I love this post and how positive you are about what his challenges bring to your life. He seems like such a sweet kid.

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  44. Tommy sounds like a fun kid. What a great post that tells me cool things about him.

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  45. I love this post and Tommy! Thank you for bringing awareness to his challenges. My son doesn't have autism but we do struggle with ADHD and this post reminds me to celebrate his uniqueness instead of looking at the challenges.

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  46. I love this. I feel like there are so many misconceptions about autism and so many are lumped into one idea when it is really an entire spectrum. I think it is important to make ourselves aware of this . Tommy seems like an awesome kid!

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  47. Such a beautiful tribute to a beautiful child - thank you for sharing!!! He seems like a great kid, thanks in large part to having a great mother, of course!!

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  48. This is so cool. Tommy's all grown-up and is still adorable. You must be very proud. AMER

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  49. What a wonderful post about your sweet Tommy! I love each photo and learning about his life. Tommmy seems like a wonderful young man and I can feel how very proud you are of him. Keep doing a great job Mama!

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  50. Very touching article! I like the dance picture. He's lucky to have a wonderful and caring mom :)

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  51. This melted my heart! Very touching. Tommy seems like an incredible young man!

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  52. He is such a cute young man.This post is really inspiring for all moms and kids.Keep going!You both mom and kid are doing a great job to face the life challenges!

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  53. Tommy was the most adorable baby and he has grown into a handsome young man. I hope he finds a few close friends and go and enjoy the dances with them. Go Tommy!

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  54. This is so beautiful. Tommy sounds like a well rounded middle schooler, and the son of one very awesome mama!

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  55. Time flies so fast, Tommy is now in Middle school! I love that he is into weathers and enjoys it. Who would have thought he will grow that fast, he's such a handsome man now. - ANOSA

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  56. This is such a cute post. It's so incredible how happy he is in his pictures. Truly beautiful.

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  57. Oh this was lovely to read. What a handsome young man. My step brother has autism and has a lot of similarities.

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  58. What a brilliant tribute to your son. You are doing an amazing job with him, he looks incredible happy!

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  59. I'm pretty sure Tommy is a better artist than I am! Thanks for sharing, it does so much for other moms going through the same thing.

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  60. This is such a sweet and heartfelt post. I can only imagine how difficult it must be at times, but you do an amazing job of conveying how amazing he truly is.

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  61. Such an amazing and inspiring post. You both are blessed to have each other. He is an adorable kid :)

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  62. I love the little boy! When I see the pictures and hes smile id like to hug him... I know thats a bit dificult. Very well done post, I liked to read it...

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  63. That's so sweet. I commend him for being so brave and enthusiastic. And I love "he's glad he's not a girl" hahaha

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  64. So cute - I love hat he has his own YouTube channel! He sounds like a sweet kid!

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  65. sounds like a super cute kid. keep doing what you're doing with him.

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  66. He seems like a wonderful person! I love seeing the support he has and that you let him be exactly who he is. We all have our own journey and struggles but having someone there with you always makes it easier.

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  67. Tommy is AMAZING and, as you know, quite similar to my boy. My boy is never quiet though, hahaha! He is constantly making some kind of noise or sound.

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  68. This is so touching Amber Tommy is really great & I love reading about him on your blog & I just subscribed to his YouTube Channel!! All the best Tommy!!

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  69. I have a Tommy in my home, but his name is Henry. I can relate to just about everything you talked about in this post. We had such a hard time in school, we ended up pulling him our in 4th grade. I homeschool him now.

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  70. Awww such a beautiful article! Tommy is a pretty COOL Dude! An awesome way to share some insight about his life.

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  71. What a beautiful little boy and so lucky to have you as a mom!

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  72. I've enjoyed reading about Tommy. He definitely seems like a great friend that anyone would love to have. You're also an amazing mother.

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  73. Wow this was beatiful. Thanks for sharing Tommy with us all. He is amazing. I love the reason he is glad he is not a girl. lol Thanks again for your Tommy with us.

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  74. I think it's awesome that you shared this with us. He's amazing and I'm sure he'll do amazing things as he goes on in life too.

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  75. It's always nice to read about other bloggers' kids and get to know them more. Tommy is really special, anyone would be lucky to be his friend!

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  76. I couldn't love this more!! Tommy is a huge inspiration and someone for kids to look up to.

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  77. Tommy seems a lot like my oldest son Calvin & I thought he wouldn't go to any school dances by he did and was quite the charmer since we always danced he was one of the few boys who really knew how to slow dance :) so I have no doubt that Tommy will be quite the charmer

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  78. Your son is an amazing young man. He will grow up to be a wonderful caring adult man. God bless him.

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  79. Such a beautiful post, Amber. And Tommy is a young handsome man. He will be an inspiration to many others. 🙂

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  80. Awww this is such a beautiful post! I would never have been able to tell that Tommy has autism, he looks and I am sure is smart in every which way. Such an inspiration!!

    xx, Kusum | www.sveeteskapes.com

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  81. This is adorable. Tommy has a lucky mom!!

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  82. What a beautiful post. They grow up so fast and you just made such a beautiful photo album for him. I will try to do one for my girls as well.

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  83. He is an awesome kid!
    This is so touching and he is really great & I love reading about him on your blog.

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  84. Tommy knows he is loved that is why he feels AU-SOME, his shirt with Matthew really says that he is brave to face the world. "Alright, alright, alright!" ;)
    BTW, I love the very candid photos you took of him. Thank you for sharing. :)

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  85. Tommy seems like a pretty amazing boy and I think he has a pretty amazing mom! What a great story and I love the photos you shared of him growing up.

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  86. We have watched Tommy grow up into a fine young man. There may be things he feels like he doesn't want to experience but aren't we all like that in ways. Keep encouraging what he does enjoy.

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  87. Aww, I do understand as my daughter has autism and is 6 1/2 yrs old. Tommy is creative and it shows in his drawing.

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  88. You have an absolutely beautiful son! Autism can be so frustrating and hard to figure out. It looks like you have learned how to help him in ways that works for him. My sister-in-law and brother have an autistic little girl and there are definitely things she is still learning even though she is now in her 20s.

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  89. I absolutely loved learning about Tommy. What a cutie! One of my kids is extremely quiet and doesn't have many friends, but just like you said, when people give her a chance she is the best friend and so sweet.

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  90. This is great and he sure is a great son. No problem with being quiet so long as he is a happy child.

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  91. Tommy sounds like a huge blessing in yiur life

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  92. The period picture had me giggling. Tommy sounds like an amazing kid! My 6 year old loved his drawing of the lion. He said "That looks REAL!" :)

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  93. I love this ode to Tommy. My little boy has Aspergers and has a lot of issues like that. He is in 1st grade and we have also been contacted by the teacher for melt downs many times this year. Your son is growing up into a lovely boy. You should be very proud!

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  94. Tommy's amazing! I think this is such a sweet post for him. I love that he does his own thing and he doesn't care about what others think.

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  95. This is a wonderful post! Bless your heart and Tommy's too!! I have a friend who has an autistic child. I do think they are a gift to parents as they are very special.

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  96. What a touching tribute to your son. I remember countless IEP meetings with my son's therapists and teachers wondering how my son would fare through all of this. Funny thing, that amazing baby has grown into an amazing teenager and I am so proud of him.

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  97. Awww what a very sweet post. Our youngest has autism as well. Thanks for sharing your beautiful post.

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  98. He is such a sweetheart! Thank you for sharing his story. I have friends with kids who have autism. I would definitely share this to them. Very heart warming post!

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  99. Aw this is really great! Thank you for introducing us to Tommy. He sounds like a great kid and he has a great mother too!

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  100. There's not doubt that Tommy is amazing! I love his attitude on life! I want to have that kind of confidence to just simply do what I want and what I feel like.

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  101. Tammy is really special. We learn a great lesson from him -- it is your mind that matters. An autistic child may be physically disturbed, but he can think and do the way anyone can. Thanking you for introducing him to us. Godbless you both.

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  102. I love this post and the way you have wrote this. No doubt Tommy is amazing and I really hope he still has the feel good attitude and positive vibes in the future. :) God bless.

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  103. Tommy sounds like a very special kiddo, you are raising him well. God knows he would be in his best to have a MOm that is caring as you.

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  104. What a wonderful post! Tommy is not only special but a brilliant boy. Autism is not a hindrance on his talents. Tommy is very lucky to have a wonderful mom like you. I will check out his youtube channel!

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  105. Very touching. Tommy is so lucky to have a mom like you!
    xo, Sondra
    Cuisineandtravel.com

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  106. I think we can all agree that Tommy is nothing short of amazing. He has such a contagious smile.

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  107. I loved the way you have written this post. In just a few words & photos we got to know so much about Tommy! I had seen a TV show once focusing on autism. But, I guess there are different types here as well. I'm glad to have read this today! :)

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  108. Your words in this post are almost poetic! I love seeing the photos, and all the special
    nuances that make this soul tick. Tommy has a dynamite smile - sweet, and heart-melting. 💕 Xo, Evelyn, PathofPresence.com 🦋

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  109. I love this so so much. My oldest has Aspergers and when he was young I would imagine what life would be like for him...this young man who fit in better with adults than kids his own ages, he too thought his siblings were loud, was always in a book but so smart and loving like your Tommy too. He is almost 19 and he is an EMT and a FireFighter, his Aspergers may shine through at times but he certainly doesn't let that define him. Reading your story about Tommy I remember doing those things as well, and at the end of the day that smile even if it was a slight grin would always warm my heart.

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  110. Heartwarming post! One of my friends has Aspergers. When I first met him, I had the typical image of what someone with ASD would be like, but he has taught me so much throughout our friendship. I can tell Tommy is a great kid!

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  111. I am loving this story! It is so amazing and I bet will be a real help with parents who are experiencing a new diagnosis!

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  112. What a special boy you have there. Autism can be rough but when there's parents like you, kids have it easier.

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  113. This is all Tommy, and Tommy sounds awesome! Love that Tommy has his own youtube channel! Such a lovely post highlighting Tommy's uniqueness :)

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  114. Aww, I liked reading about Tommy. He sounds like an interesting character, I have to check out his YouTube. Thanks for sharing!

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  115. The love you have for your son is just so beautiful. What a remarkable bond you two share. And what a remarkable boy your Tommy is!

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  116. He is a sweet boy and incredibly smart! I like the photo of him and his sister, saying he loves her a little bit is funny.

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  117. What a wonderful post about a wonderful young man. Tommy is lucky to have you in his life and you are lucky to have Tommy in your life.

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  118. Angela Ricardo BetheaApril 9, 2018 at 8:22 PM

    Great post!! Tommy is such an awesome young boy and smart. He is so lucky to have you mom.

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  119. This is such a sweet post. Tommy is such a sweet and smart boy. Thanks for sharing.

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Thanks for the comment!

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