Monday, September 28, 2009


“So who died? What happened? Why is everyone crying?” Tom asked me on Thursday night as I watched Grey’s Anatomy. This wouldn’t bother me if he had asked these questions during a commercial. But no. He has a bad habit of asking questions during the actual show. And yes, I suppose I could have paused it but sometimes I’m just not in the mood to converse.

“No talking,” I said to Tom and pressed a finger to my lips. I had just got the kids down and was relishing in the fact that I could stretch out on the couch and watch a show in peace.

“Who died? Who is George?” Tom continued, not getting the hint. Apparently he doesn’t comprehend the words “no talking.”

“It’s quiet time!” I tried again.

He continued to yak again when I started to watch FlashForward on my DVR.

“What’s this? What’s going on?”


He thankfully lapsed into a silence for a few minutes and then practically fell off the couch when he shouted, “Seth MacFarlane! That’s Seth MacFarlane, creator of Family Guy! I knew he sounded familiar. I kept going, ‘Why am I hearing Brian the Dog?’ and now I know why. Because it’s SETH MACFARLANE!”

Oh my dear God.

You have to understand that Seth MacFarlane is sort of like a God to Tom. He loves Family Guy and loves to quote the show.

So basically, since Tom kept asking me questions during MY show, I decided I’d do the same to him when he was watching his beloved Family Guy.

“Wow, is that a dog? Why is a dog talking? It’s not a Disney movie after all,” I said as I plopped on the couch. (For those who have never seen the show, it depicts this dog named Brian who behaves like a human.)

Tom pulled his eyes from the screen and stared at me as though I had a bra wrapped around my forehead.

“So does the entire family understand what Stewie is saying? Or it is really just his thoughts like they did in Look Who’s Talking? ” I continued sweetly. (Stewie is the one year old in the show.)

Of course I knew the answers to these questions but I just wanted Tom to feel the frustration that I experienced.

“Amber,” Tom said, speaking to me as though I were a complete idiot. “You’ve seen this show a lot. Why are you asking me dumb questions?”

Dumb questions?

Excuse me!

“I’m surprised that other people don’t question that a dog is walking around behaving like a human. If a dog was walking on two legs around me and talking in English, I’d be scared shitless!” I said, completely ignoring Tom’s statement.

Tom frowned as he tried to concentrate on the show. “Amber, please. I’m trying to watch.”


“Just like I try to watch my shows in peace,” I said.

A commercial came on the screen so Tom stared at me again. “What?”

“It’s annoying when people speak during your shows, right?” I pressed.

Tom was clearly bewildered. “Right…” he replied slowly.

“Well, you seem to love asking me questions during my programs so I decided to do the same during yours to teach you a lesson,” I explained.

Tom made a face. “I never ask questions during your shows!” he argued. Then he seemed to remember jabbering on while the show was running and he looked slightly guilty. “I mean…well, sometimes I just need to know what’s going on.”

“And I’ll be happy to answer your questions. During the commercial break,” I said. I stuck my hand out. “So do we have a deal? No talking during shows?”

Tom gave me a limp shake. “I guess…”

He’s going to totally forget. I can almost bet when I watch Grey’s Anatomy this week he’s going to be all, “Wow, so there are LESBIANS on this show?”


  1. I love Greys Anatomy and I love George... :-( My hubs does the same thing ... on and on about the questions when im watching my shows... But no questions allowed when he is watching his.

    Thankfully, I also love Family Guy so thats kindasorta our common ground.

  2. I have never watched Gray's. It seems like it's gotten ridiculous lately.

  3. I didn't like Grey's. When the chief got hit by a car, I wanted to jump off my balcony. TOO MUCH!

  4. This is why I refuse to watch any of my shows while my husband is home. I DVR everything and wait until he is not home to watch them. The best is when we are watching something we're both seeing for the first time and he's asking me questions like "who is that"..."what are they doing?", etc. I always say "let's watch and see shall we.". Sheesh!

  5. My kids and boyfriend know better than to bother me during Survivor or Grey's. It's Mommy's quiet time!

  6. I think this is universal. Although it does confuse them when we engage in commentary during our shows. I realized this while watching the finale episode of S&TC with my husband. I was laughing and gasping and defintely having some one sided conversations with the TV. At some point, Chris made a joke and I looked at him like he had just teleported in from the other room (who is this guy and where did he come from?). I stared at him for a second, then said, "I'm sorry - I guess I never explained the rules to you. I can talk during my shows, but you can't." It's not fair - but that's life.

  7. So, what did you think of Grey's? I loved it but I felt like way too much stuff was crammed in to those two hours... I found myself trying to keep up.

  8. I have the bad habit of doing this to Ben...

  9. I haven't seen Grey's in a while. Are Hawkeye and Trapper John still on the show?

  10. Oh I think I am guilty of talking over my husband's football games. I'm all, wait, is that the guy that fought the dogs? I'm bad.

  11. I love Grey's too, and I tape it and watch it on Friday while the kids at school and the hubbie is at work. Peace at last!

    My husband bugs me when I'm on the phone. He can make comments or ask questions while I'm trying to have a conversation, but God forbid I interrupt HIM while he's on the phone. UGH!

  12. Why is it that when they are watching a show, we can't speak, but when we are watching a show, they can make all the noise they want?

  13. So wait. . . you have SHOWS??? Your t.v. isn't perpetually tuned to the Golf Channel???

    Mine is. . .

  14. Drives me nuts when people do that.

    Some new character enters a film scene.

    "Who’s that?"


  15. That is the most aggravating thing! I hate when they do that!

  16. TiVo needs to make a mute button for noisy husbands! :) So funny!

  17. In my family, my son is the commentator. Drives me crazy. Must be a man thing.

  18. Sadly, I think Grey's Anatomy may have "jumped the shark."
    I just found you through Aunt of 14, award thingy.
    I enjoyed reading your blog, (first two pages so far.)
    Always enjoy a good writer!

    Now I must go think of ten things I haven't posted about myself before.

  19. My hubby does this to my too but when I am reading blogs. I will laugh and he will be like, what? what is so funny?

  20. Oooooh, I'd get a little miffed about that, too. I love Grey's Anatomy and watch it regularly. Lucky for me, Jim usually goes to bed early when he has to get up at 2 or 3 AM for work.

  21. Um, I'd be that guilty party in my family. I pretty much make Tom look innocent. I am terrible. Wanna watch a movie together?

  22. My husband does what Dan. said. So very annoying.

  23. He'll totally forget by this weekend. My hubs does the EXACT same thing. A week of memory would be a win, in fact.

  24. My Husband does the same thing...and I want to choke him with my bare hands!

  25. I have watched LOST since day one. I have a reasonable idea of what's going on, and yet, for four years, my husband would walk through the room, watch six seconds, then insist he knew everything. EVERYTHING! It made me crazy. Don't go saying you know what's going on on tha crazy mixed up show when you've only watched a collective 12 minutes and I have put in the blood and sweat! Finally, last season, I got him to put up or shut up, and he started watching with me!

    Of course, now I have to explain to him what's going on and who is who!

    (I still haven't watched last week's Grey's Anatomy!)

  26. How funny!! I hate when someone does that to me... although admittedly, I do it to my husband more often than not- without even realizing it!

  27. i've never watched grey's anatomy.... for some reason its never drawn my attention...but i SO know what you mean about the kids ask less questions than the hubs!!

  28. The TV, now that is a reason I'm happy to be single! You take the good, you take the bad.....And oh my gosh, Flash Forward! What on earth is that about and I had to turn the lights on after I watched it to be sure that man in black was lurking about!

  29. This is funny - although at my house it's usually the kids that are more guilty. I'm at the point where I don't watch anything around them anymore so I don't have to give a running commentary on what's happening. Maybe you should have a code word ("Brian the dog!") and then when he hears you say that he knows to zip it. :)


  30. My wife always interrupts and wants to talk to me when I'm blogging.

    Like now.

    You're a girl - YOU tell her. Do her jeans and shoes go?

  31. Thge only times I find Family Guy amusing are when Stewie acts like a real baby and/or Brian acts like a real dog.

    Tom and I are both pretty quiet watching shows. but when one of the kids asks a question he always pauses the show. Technology is grand.

  32. The joys of trying to watch TV in the house with a spouse.

  33. My hubby does the same thing. He gets real loud while he's playing with my daughter & I keep cranking the volume. Not sure why guys do that stuff.

  34. LOL too funny! My husband does the same thing - except that he and the kids are all talking in OUR room and that drives me NUTS - so I ALWAYS have to pause it - UGH! Glad to see I'm not alone! LOL Way to teach him a lesson! :o)

  35. Is that Journey?

    Oh! It is Journey!

    Family Guy is AWESOME!

  36. hey tom - I LOVE FAMILY GUY TOO! and my husband does the EXACT same thing and i just put it on pause, give him THE LOOK or rewind while i heave a great sigh of irritation

  37. Mr. Peach Tart talks all the time during my shows too. I've taken to giving him the nasty stink eye.

  38. Bwahahahahaha! I think that I might be in love with you.

  39. i know right?!?!.... so annoying!! i'll tell him to shut up and he's all "your so mean.. why won't you talk to me.. blah.. blah.. blah".... BUT if i were to talk in his shows.... OH MAN!!

  40. Oh...I'm pretty sure I'm the one annoying the husband during his shows.

    I better work on that (even if football games are so freaking long).

  41. OMG! I think we're living in alternate universes of each others (does that even make sense?)! I'm watching my show . . . Shut the eff up. LOL!

  42. So... “So does the entire family understand what Stewie is saying? Or it is really just his thoughts like they did in Look Who’s Talking?”

    Pleeeeeeeeeeeeeease tell me... do they???? I've never been able to figure that out.


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