Friday, July 11, 2014

Why Having A Girl Is Fun (And Frustrating)

I have a daughter named Natalie.

She knows what she likes. She's known it since I gave birth to her. She'd cry and cry and cry after I fed her, after I changed her, after I sang to her (maybe that was the problem. I'm not the best singer.)

Having a daughter can be an adventure. And here are the reasons why:





--Natalie will suddenly tell me that she will no longer respond to her name. "Call me Princess." "Call me Elsa." "My name is not Natalie anymore. It's Greta."




--"My waffles are touching the syrup. My WAFFLES ARE TOUCHING THE SYRUP." All will be going well--seconds before, Natalie (or Greta. Or Princess) will have been laughing. Suddenly, drama. Over something incredibly mundane. She started crying the other day because she remembered "that her teacher was strict." I mean??



--She'll beg you to play Barbies with her--and then dictate HOW you need to play them. "No! That's Stacy. She doesn't like Ken. Stop! She DOESN'T LIKE KEN! They can't be NEAR each other. Ken is MEAN to Stacy ALL THE TIME!" Yes, she'll actually speak in caps. Girls are loud, yo.





--Girls might like expressing themselves in CAPS, but they also can be sweet. You'll receive nice drawings and letters. Most of the time "just because" but sometimes because they do want something. ("There's a new American Girl doll out! Can I get it?" "No. Unless you give up eating for a month, because that's the only way we can afford one right now.") (Don't be surprised if you're met with, "I just won't eat then," followed by a flippant shrug.)




--She'll have to look in the toy aisle of every store you go into, even if you just need to get a lightbulb. "I have to see my toys! They miss me!" she'll insist, even though you explain that you only wanted to spend 5 minutes in the store, because all you need is a lightbulb. "But my toys MISS me! I promised that I'd stop by the next time I was here! I promised them, Mommy!"





--Let It Go will be sung many times a day. Off key, most likely, unless you gave birth to the next Mariah Carey. (I did not.) Sometimes you'll be on a call, trying to make a doctor appointment, and she'll be screaming, "The cold never bothered me anyway." Followed by a door slam "because that's what Elsa does!" Or you'll be trying to pee, and suddenly there will be a knock on the door, and then, "Do you wanna build a snowman?" I don't, actually, so please stop asking.





--"Can my friends come inside to see my room?" This will be asked several times a day. Even if you've explained that no one is allowed inside because it's No Bra Sunday and you don't want to traumatize another child. You'll suggest playing outside and will be met with a sigh. "Outside is BORING. There's NOTHING TO DO OUTSIDE!" One hour later? "Can my friends come inside to see my room?"



--She'll refuse to leave the house unless she's in costume. "I can't possibly wear pants..." I'll agree, because I have things to do, and I don't feel like arguing. It's okay though, many people are amused to see a princess clomping through the grocery store or twirling around Target.



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Having a girl will keep you alert.

But it's okay, because you can dress them up in things like this when they are tiny:




And they won't complain. (Much.)

64 comments:

  1. Are girls not the weirdest creatures ever?

    I love my 16 year old to the core, but sometimes I swear she is out of her mind with the crap that spews from her mouth.

    Then I remember how I was just like that 1t 16.

    But I love the days she's sweet and considerate and affectionate. I could live on days like that forever.

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  2. Gosh she is just what Penny is going to be in the future. Penny must be wearing a dress at all times, preferably a princess one.

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  3. As the mom of 2 girls, I greatly relate to this entire thing! So funny and so true!-Ashley

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  4. My daughter is 7 as well and I can totally relate. Especially about the dictating how to play. And the living life in caps. It's exhausting. But mostly fun. Except when the attitude comes out. Then not so much.

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  5. I would love a little girl to dress up but I'm also terrified for reasons like these!

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  6. I think you explained it perfectly for just about any daughter. OR at least yours is a replica of my niece!

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  7. kayla does that all the time - she asks to play with X and then bosses me around on how to play it so i legit say: listen here: when you ask someone to play, you can't tell them what to do. you play how you want to play and let me play how i want to play otherwise i won't play and neither will anyone else. you have to play together otherwise you're just bossing them around and no one likes that!

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    1. Hah! Does that actually work in your house? It sure doesn't work in mine. :(

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  8. I love this.

    My younger daughter is the same age as Natalie and she's very much a girlie-girl too. When I got home from work the other day, she was in a Grecian-style dress. My husband informed me she'd insisted on wearing it all day because it was the only dress in the house that was even close to being like Elsa's.

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  9. Haha, this makes me want to have a little girl even more.

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  10. Girls sound exhausting! I love my boy. Jeans, t-shirt and sneakers. Done.

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  11. Sounds like I have a lot to look forward to... ;)

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  12. Yep! I have two girls and that's how it goes down!

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  13. This was fun - I can't relate to a lot of these things since I only have boys:)

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  14. I agree with all of the above....and mine is just now turning 5....

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  15. My girl is 4 and is everything that you listed. Glad to know some things don't change! I gave up fighting the costumes when going out. Who cares, right? As long as the dress fits decently, and nothing is showing, girl grab your shoes, lets go!

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  16. Girls are so different, LOL! My little girl is so nurturing, yet has this mean streak in her that could scare a she-devil. Hahaha, they definitely are fun to shop for though!

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  17. HAHAHA the Elsa songs. My husband had a phone interview the other day and my youngest was SCREAMING Let it Go at the TOP of her lungs. Needless to say, he didn't get the job. Thanks, Elsa.

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  18. Today Scarlet told me I couldn't look at her, or at anything near her, and I also couldn't laugh.
    So uncool.
    It's all so interesting, isn't it? I always wanted a daughter and I'm sure glad I got one.

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  19. I have a five year old girl :-) I get the letters and sweet notes all the time. Then, she asks me where "such-and-such" card is that she made me three weeks ago. I always get in trouble!

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  20. As you know, I have no girls ... but all these things reminded me of myself as a kid ... and also to call my mom and apologize. Ha! :)

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  21. You hit it right on the nose. And it seems to continue through the teenage years....just with different stuff.

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  22. Aw... this was so sweet! I'm slightly horrified to have a girl (because a lot of the reasons you listed), but I also look at the close relationship with my mom and what that some day. Now let's see how many times I catch myself singing "let it go" today :)

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  23. Your daughter is as cute as it gets and I'm not surprised she is such a girly girl. Her doll antics remind me of my niece, the complete opposite of me as a child. Her syrup/waffles condition unfortunately reminds me of my husband, who uses a separate bowl for his syrup and also requests that no meat (bacon, sausage) touch anything else on his plate...so he gets a second one. At least Natalie is adorable, my husband, eh. lol

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  24. See it's my boys who are the weirdos! Benjamin likes to be different (fictional) animals, like a Prairie cheetah or a mountain whale. Then I have to treat him as that animal. He also doesn't understand English, so I have to speak Cheetah to him. Most of the time it's cute, but after a while it gets annoying and instead of quitting, he double downs!

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  25. HEHEHE...great article. Made me grin.

    Not going to go into detail here, just 4 words:

    I Have Eight Daughters

    ...completely relate and I'll be praying for you...in between laughs of my own....

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  26. "My toys miss me!" LOL!!!
    Oh, the things I get to look forward to. I was telling my husband we have about 10 years until PMS strikes, even though it feels like our almost 4 year-old has PMS all the time.
    It's the times they're being really cute and sweet that just get me to forget all that. :)

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  27. Love this, even though I have a tomboy so no dresses, no matching clothes. you must look homeless at all times. *sigh! This post was really funny, thanks!

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  28. Okay, your GIFs are hilarious!
    Always love a Natalie fix. :)

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  29. I love this post! My daughter was the same. Now she is a tween and very frustrating. lol

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  30. Soo true. My daughter now is 24. She was the same way and I can say for most girls growing up I think they all have one way of thinking sometimes. :)

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  31. This is so funny! I know it is the truth because of friends of ours who have three daughters under the age of 10. I have a 16 month old boy, so I guess I can laugh at this from a distance.

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  32. I giggled this entire time because I felt your emotions here. I have two boys and some of this rings true for them but I feel like I've got it easy now!

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  33. This was very fun to read about, it's so true :P

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  34. This actually sounds a lot like my son. One day he was Flash Detector Superman (or something like that), and another day he was Julius.
    He likes to dictate exactly how we play to the point that it ends up with gun whining because I didn't do something right.
    Of course, there are the meltdowns because he wanted the cantaloupe cut like rainbows intead of chunks. LOL!

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  35. I have 2 girls and I totally agree with you! They are more fun when they are younger but once they become teenagers is nothing but frustration LOL.

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  36. This is absolutely on point! I have two daughters....and a son right in the middle. My girls are so thoughtful, but also emotional LOL

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  37. I'm not a mom but I can imagine my own mother saying these things herself. She has all these stories about me when I was a little girl - must have been fun for her. Guess this is something that I can look forward to when I have my own little me.

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  38. I love this post all around! I laughed so hard! Mother of two girls!

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  39. Your girl actually sounds an awful lot like my little boy. When you play with him, everything has to be HIS way and if you can't envision exactly what is going on inside his head, a major meltdown occurs. As much as I would love to be a mind-reader, I wasn't born with that gift. But the part about your little girl knocking on the door asking you to build a snowman made me LOL! So funny!

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  40. The life of a young girl can me fun, exhausting and eye rolling, but boy is it worth it when they grown to be young adults. I love hanging out with my daughter and yearn for those princess costume days :)

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  41. haha! I have a 2 years old girl. Now i dont want her to get old. lol!

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  42. This sounds so true. I never had a daughter but I raised my niece from the time she was 14 to 18. It can actually get worse as they get older with their mood swings and you just have to go with the flow. Thanks for sharing your experiences and good luck the next few years. lol

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  43. I think that having a daughter would be total joy! The frilly clothes, ballet recitals, all kinds of girly things!

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  44. I found this very entertaining. Great post!

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  45. LOL! I agree because I have one as well. My Summer Babe is ten and is a pain in the arse especially when I tell her to clean her room.

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  46. I have twin girls and I get double the things that you go through on this list. I honestly thought my girls were just a little too expressive, I didn't know other moms go through the same thing that I do!

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  47. This is so true lol! I personally don't have children but I have a little sister who is 11 years younger than me. We are currently going through her teenage years and lets just say it hasn't been pleasant. The mood swings are awful! But there's no denying that when shes good, she's amazing! Great post :-)

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  48. A great piece on the ups and downs of having a daughter :) I don't have kids yet, but it is the plan next year :) your piece was so insightful!

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  49. LOL! Sounds like you are talking about my daughter! That "how to play" dictating is so common in our householde too!

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  50. I 100% agree and I have two of them!! It is so frustrating sometimes some of the emotional stuff but it's a great ride of a roller coaster.

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  51. I babysit several little girls and goodness, I can relate to the Elsa one. Let it go, so many times...I can't even begin to explain. The Do you want to build a snowman happens way too often as well. Sigh. Children. Got to love them.

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  52. If I had my way, I'd birth three little boys and I'd be a happy camper. However, I wish my mom had let me roam around in princess gowns! I think that's why I publicly wear tutus now. Making up for lost time! lol

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  53. As a mom of a girl i can totally relate. There are some bumpy roads but, I wouldn't trade it for anything.

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  54. Hahahaha omg so relate to this!!! I have a daughter and as fun as it can be doing all the girly stuff... omg!!!! It can be pretty draining too lol

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  55. The pictures loaded before the post and I was already cracking up. Very funny.

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  56. Ha! These are all great points. I'm the only girl and can relate on so many levels.

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  57. I have been super lucky with my son. I can however say my nieces fit pretty much everything you listed and OUCH so much admiration! Keep on keeping on building strong, amazing women can be such a hard task.

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  58. bwahahahahahahahhaa this is hilarious. and so true. my sisters and i were just like this.

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  59. This post was hilarious also made me glad I had a boy first lol. My mom always said boys are easier girls are so dramatic and high maintenance. Then again I am a only girl so spoiled rotten even now that I have my own child.

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  60. What a fun post! I gave birth to boys only, but my sister had a girl and I could so seeing all this happen:)

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  61. This is such a funny article because it is SO TRUE! It makes me think of what my father must have thought when he was raising me and my younger sister on his own. And my sister was ALL. ABOUT. the princess dresses and wigs that had be to worn at all times, no matter what, especially in public.

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