Friday, March 6, 2015

7 Facebook Rules For My Teenager

Tommy turned 13 on Monday.

Of course it was exciting.

But his main goal was to get a Facebook account. He had to wait until he was 13 as per Facebook rules. He'd go on rants on how kids under 13 were on Facebook. "But they're LYING!" he'd say over and over. "They lied about their birthday!" Since he has autism, he is really big on rules.

Finally, he was 13.


And yes, he got a Facebook account. With rules.





1. Do not accept friend requests from strangers. The profile picture might be of a kid, but it could really be a fat old man.


2. NEVER agree to meet someone. You'll get kidnapped.


3. Use proper grammar at all times. It's YOU'RE welcome. Never YOUR welcome or UR welcome. UR is not a word. U is not a word either. It's always Y-O-U.


4. If proper grammar isn't used, your Mommy will correct you. It's important that you look like you passed elementary school. This will be good training for when you start a job.


5. Do not post multiple photos of yourself per day. Some people do this, and it frightens me. No one cares to see someone else 5+ times in the same position in the car. Twice is the limit and even then I'm like, "Oh look, there's her pores again."


6. Do not use Facebook as a way to complain about your parents. Don't say, "I've just been grounded! My Mom is acting like Kanye West! I hate her." First of all, calling someone Kanye West is a huge insult. Don't do it. Second of all, if you get grounded, it's for good reasons. Hate is a mean word, and you'll make me cry. Don't make Mommy cry.


7. I know it's exciting to have a Facebook account, but no one needs to know every detail of your day. Don't be like SOME people who are like, "Just woke up!" followed by, "Going on a walk!" followed by, "Taking a dump!" followed by, "Making quinoa for lunch!" Quinoa is nasty, son.




I hope my teenager enjoys his Facebook account. But if he abuses the privilege in any way, it's gone. I don't think I'll have an issue: as I mentioned, he's big on following the rules and is appalled as I am when he sees someone write 'your welcome.'

When my daughter is old enough for a Facebook account, I'll be worried. She's...well, she tries to get away with things more often. But I still have a few years left until she's old enough for one.


Do you have rules for your teenager if they go on Facebook?

75 comments:

  1. i have no idea what i'll do when that time comes. kayla has been starting to show interest for the computer and she uses my old one as "hers". i do stress that trust is a big thing for me and once that is gone, so are all of her freedoms. she doesn't know what social media is yet so right now, her big thing is watching shows on youtube.

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  2. Hahaha, these rules are great. I love them. All of my 8th graders had Facebook accounts last year, and they could all do whatever they wanted -their parents didn't even know they had them! So I think it's especially great that you set up some ground rules for him. :)

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  3. Haha yes to all of these rules!!! :)

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  4. My parents wouldn't let me have a Facebook until I was 16. And then, my Dad monitored it with his own Facebook. My Dad was a preacher. My life was strict.

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  5. Sheesh, I'm still stuck on the headline. Can't believe he is 13! I think you've done a great job with these rules!

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  6. When does he get an instagram, snapchat and vine? Oh and a youtube? He will need all these things. Hahahaha

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  7. I love these rules. #6 is my favorite.

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  8. Best Facebook rules ever! Hahaha, the Kanye West thing made me choke on my coffee!

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  9. lol! I will be letting Jaina have a facebook account at her 13th birthday in May. However, I let her go ahead and sign up for Instagram. I told her that her selfies were limited to ONE a day :P (And whoops... I forgot you hate that word!)

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  10. Best rule ever: be careful who you call Kanye - you can't take that shit back. Happy Birthday to Tommy!

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  11. These are great rules for anyone, not just 13 year old boys!!

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  13. Haha! Kayne is a swear word!! Quinoa is nasty! Good call on the rules!

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  14. I took daughters away and she ended up getting one under a different name. aggravating

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  15. HAHAHA Kanye West hahahahahahahahaha. I needed that laugh this morning. My daughter is 9 and already talking about cell phones and shit. Wtf? I didn't get a cell phone until I was like 20. Do you remember growing up without Facebook? I do. It was glorious. I think I'm officially the old man in the lawn chair.

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  16. I just had a discussion with my daughter on proper grammar/spelling this morning. She doesn't have Facebook, the talk was regarding her texting but I will be borrowing your #3 and #4, thanks!!

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  17. This was funny yet so true.

    Love the grammar one. Your, you're, UR - LOL.

    Thanks for sharing!

    Wishing you a lovely weekend.
    xoxo

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  18. Rules are so needed. I have a lot of teenage siblings and cousins and in-laws and my rule is to not friend any of them--it's too frightening to see perfectly nice kids making fools of themselves online. My husband has really been trying to discourage a a selfie and emo-posts habit in his teenage brother...

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  19. Fabulous rules! Welcome to the world of teenagers :)

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  20. Awesome awesome awesome advice. I never thought that I would have an account, and yet because of the oldest teen in the house had to get one to monitor her!!! I had that thing more than she did that year!!! Funny after about a year and a half neither of us are interested in it, as we once were. Now I have another coming up to the age of 13~~~ Yikes, here we go again! Love your rules :) Good luck!!!!

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  21. ha! These rules shouldn't just be for Tommy - they should be universal.

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  22. HAHAH I think EVERYONE needs to follow these rules on FB.

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  23. Excellent rules! My daughter begged for FB, and now she never goes on it. Evidently it is no longer cool among the high school kids; it's just for old people like me, she says.

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  24. These are really great rules. It must be so scary having a kid of "internet" age.

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  25. These rules are perfect. I did something similar with my boys, and so far they haven't been kidnapped or made me cry, so I guess they listened!

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  26. These are all rules my kids had too. They also had to give me the password and I would randomly check if. They also had to keep me as a friend and not hide posts from me. If they do they immediately have fecebook taken away

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  27. Good rules! None of my kids are on it yet (since the oldest is only 11) but some of their friends have had them for years. I'm confused by this.

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  28. The least of my worries was Facebook. If they have a phone, or a computer, it can be so much worse. I love these rules though, and they matched mine when my teenager started on Facebook, but yours are worded so much more eloquently. :)

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  29. What a refreshing take on this; I have seen so many parents get upset with their kids on Facebook and they are the ones that gave the account before 13 years of age... This had me rolling though; great jokes riddled throughout. All seriousness though, thank you, I have been wondering much about getting my twins accounts when they get of age. I like how you brought it down to their level. They have e-mail accounts (strongly monitored by me) so they could be "pen pals" and write to their dad on his deployments.

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  30. It's difficult to manage teenagers on Facebook. But it is good that you have your own rules so that at least their usage is regulated.

    Abby of Life in the Fash Lane

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  31. I couldn't help but smile while reading of these rules because I never encountered these in my life. Well, I do have a facebook but I signed-up and learned my way responsibly. Glad your young man is doing well!

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  32. (He doesn't have Facebook yet.) I do have a rule with social media for him. NEVER his exact location. If he's on snapchat and we're out and about, I want him to put his phone on airplane-mode, create his stories and add them once we leave the location.

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  33. Great rules! Had the same growing up in the days of dail up (NetZero) and AIM lol.

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  34. I love rule #5. This should be in FB terms of service.

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  35. This hit home for me because my oldest will turn 13 this month and is desperate to get a start on social media. I don't let her use most social platforms, and it makes her crazy - but it's because based on her history, I'm pretty sure she'll be like most other teen girls - in a huge hurry to break the rules I set out for her. But in honor of her birthday, I'm bending my "no kids on social media" rule - I've agreed to allow her to have a fashion "blog" on Instagram, which we will use together to share her mom-approved fashion-oriented photos. Makes me glad I've said no for so long - saying yes to this made her so happy that she hasn't actually bothered to have me set it up yet!

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  36. Wow - number 2 is SO important! It reminds me of those videos that parents had set up. They would "allow" their kids to be "kidnapped" from meeting up with people they met on Facebook. I think kids (once the parent feels comfortable) should all watch those videos. They are scary yet teach their kids a lesson not to meet up with strangers!

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  37. I have two teenagers, and one has a FB account (mostly because her clubs at school communicate through FB groups) and the other isn't interested. I think having rules is REALLY important! And, it's so good to have the rules understood up front, versus trying to make them up as you go. Well done! ps - I love quinoa ;)

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  38. Haha, you made me laugh with this post! Quinoa is not nasty! I can't believe you. Substitute it for rice in your favorite recipe. I will take on flavor way better than rice will! Plus, it is a seed and had more nutrition! If you want any recipes come see me. I have some awesome ones for quinoa/rice!

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  39. I am glad you have rules and monitor his FB. It annoys me when kids at church want me to be there friend.

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  40. Great advice. Some adults could use this advice also.

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  41. This made me laugh! I loved this post! My teenager is 30, and taught me the rules of Facebook. However, it is so important to have rules and to be invested in what our kids are doing, no matter their age. Blessings to you!

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  42. Why the quinoa hate. I love quinoa. But good job mom, I also told my kids no mom bashing and they had to accept my friendship request when they were younger. I realized my son wasn't very active which was weird, and I found out he had a second account. But once their grandma got fb, they all but quit. lol

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  43. LOVE your rules!! Glad to see I'm not the only mom out there like this!

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  44. Love this. Cool mom award definitely goes to you! Is it a requirement that he be your friend on Facebook?! :) I have my mom as my friend, but she's on my "Limited profile." Which means she doesn't get access to all my pictures. Not because I don't love her and want to tell her my inner-most secrets. But because she'll ask me why I drink wine ALL THE TIME.

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  45. That would be a general rule for everyone. As for the strangers, meet-ups, selfies, detailed things-to-do. I know Tommy will be a good rule abiding teen.

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  46. Good post! When I have kids they're going to follow guidelines similar to this- You make really good points! Thank you for sharing :)

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  47. I made sure not to let kids enjoy FB until they were 15. But I agree with all these rules and can see one can make use of these.

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  48. Nice post and fun to read too. When my son reaches that age, one rule I would add is that I will be one of his friends on there and will be checking all he does. Everything said, I think it all comes down to having a strong relationship and stellar communication with your child. It's almost like being the 'cop' will only make him sneak around even more.

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  49. I don't have children but I think you have good rules for your son. These should be followed by all parents and children in my opinion.

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  50. I remember when my friend's teenage son wanted a FB profile and the debate and negotiations that went into it. What I will do in the future is to share your post with anyone in this situation.

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  51. Happy Birthday! How exciting for him. He will spend all day exploring it now and maybe tomorrow he will be tired of it.

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  52. What a great post. I am a 5th grade teacher and although kids should not have one at this age, from time to time I do get asked about it. I will share your post with them

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  53. This is still a way off for my kids but I love your rules. I think I would definitely have one in place where they can not friend people they do not know.

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  54. Do not call anyone Kanye West. I just laughed so hard that I spit my coffee out. This is absolutely amazing. I think everyone should have these rules! Share with everyone!

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  55. I cringe with the kids on Facebook. Makes me nervous. I have to remember with all my friends kids on my page I have to watch what a I say sometimes.

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  56. My kids are all grown up now and they did not have Facebook accounts until they were about 15 or 16. One of my rules was that they had to accept my friend request. Harsh. Haha. I think your rules are very reasonable. Better for the kids to know why there are rules than to be sorry later.

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  57. I'm not a parent just yet, but one of the kids I babysit is 13 and recently got social media. His favorite is snapchat which I think is most dangerous since images and messages "disappear" and what not. He definitely keeps me worried.

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  58. These seem very reasonable rules. And best of all they are written in a way that shows that mommy is still 'cool' although an adult ;) Hopefully your kid will see this the same way :) X

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  59. I'm not a fan of Facebook. Yes, I have it but only because I need it for work. I feel that it doesn't have that much of a value, lol. So kudos to you for setting these rules - if I had a kid, I'd do the same. Plus I'll ask them to make sure to strike a balance between Facebook and face-to-face interaction with friends and family.

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  60. We have very similar FB rules in our house. Mostly, we are very much against accusing anyone of being Kanye-like.

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  61. I didn't realize that there was an age minimum for Facebook but it definitely makes sense. My youngest is 10 so I haven't even thought about it yet. I love how you have rules and how they are set up to basically to protect your child. Kudos to you!

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  62. this are some cool tips, my daughter is not yet on the facebook page of life yet, but youtube and playing roblox is big thing for her, she talks to many players everyday and love to know that she knows her limits. Not looking forward to her joining facebook hhaha

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  63. My kids have always had internet and screen time rules. Facebook use included.

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  64. How brilliant is this, I love how you guys set him rules including grammar.

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  65. I think it is a fabulous idea to have facebook rules for kids. It was so much easier being a kid back in the day! I personally think kids shouldn't be on social media, but I realise how difficult it would be to keep them off!

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  66. This is a fantastic list! I love your #3 LOL I feel like this needs to be told to some adults on Facebook sometime LOL

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  67. I think these these rules should be for everyone not just your son. I h8 it wen peeps chat usin bad gramma ;) ! One of my biggest bugbears and there's no need for it!

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  68. I used to get the password when my daughter was younger. If our rules for it were violated (causing mischief online or in the chats, 'date' talk, public displays of privacy (no pictures of our house, car, etc.) the account would be zapped. She's almost 18 now, so I don't monitor it anymore. I trust that she's doing fine, and it's her responsibility to maintain that...so far, so good. :)

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  69. These are great rules! I allowed my son to get a FB profile when he was 16 and my other 2 will wait until then as well.

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  70. These are awesome rules for teenager. My son still not ready for social media but YouTube. Though he's still have limit on it.

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  71. Love these Facebook rules which you've made for your son. I hope few adults also learn how to behave on the social media!

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  72. I have the same rules in place as have a 13,14 and 17 year old who all have their own Facebook accounts its monitored

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  73. All kids are different. One of our kids posts every now and then and could take it or leave it. Two others spend alot of time using it as an online diary with every emotion known to man and not always appropriate language. However, they are older (young adults now) and no longer live at home. Not much I can do about it. The youngest two who are still at home have Facebook accounts but except for checking in every couple months they never do anything with it which is perfectly fine by me.

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