Especially when you have two messy kids.
I lose count of the messes that I clean up in a day.
So I decided to take pictures of everything I had to scrub up today. Here is what I've cleaned up so far:
This morning I found moon sand in my bathroom sink. I rue the day that I decided to purchase it because I've been finding the sand all over my house. I asked my son why there was moon sand in the sink and he said he was "watering" it. This confused me.
I'm working on potty training Natalie. I'll sometimes let her run around naked because I read that it's easier for kids to be that way when they're potty training. Needless to say, I don't think Natalie will get the chance to be naked for a long time. She peed all over the carpet and then calmly told me, "I pottied!" Then there was the time that I found her crouching over my shoe and it took me a few seconds to realize that she was totally PEEING in it. My poor Sketchers!
Do I have a daughter or a puppy?
I wish I could blame this spill on the kids. But it was me. I'm a total klutz and I knock things over on a daily basis. I may be the only adult who still bumps her drinking glass over on the table.
Natalie somehow managed to find some candy powder and took it upon herself to spread it around on the kitchen floor. "It's pretty!" she told me grandly when I caught her. Do you notice what her shirt says? It says Little Monster and I'm sorry, sometimes she truly is one.
Ack! Look what Tommy did. Okay, I'm kidding. I did that. Again, I'm a total klutz and I went to take a sip and managed to knock my juice onto the floor. What adult still does this????
Um. Can someone explain to me what in the world this is? I found it about an hour ago and at first I thought it was a bug. Then I peered closer and I was all, "The crap???" Is it pudding? Ew, what if it IS a smushed bug? But my husband isn't here so I doubt it--he has a bad habit of killing bugs and leaving the carcasses behind for ME to clean up. Whatever it is I'm still wary of cleaning it up. I'm slightly paranoid that it's...feces...though how it got on the wall like that is beyond me. But I have talented kids who have figured out all sorts of ways to leave behind messes.
Yuck.
I still spill. Often.
ReplyDeleteAnd carcass is one of my favorite words.
This was all today? I think that today I have decided to not have kids.
ReplyDeleteI will check back and see what your next post is about, and decide from there.
I was in the midst of cleaning my messy house when I decided to stop and check blogs instead. I may never get mine clean!
ReplyDeleteI had LOL about your shoes. Kids are so weird. And messy.
ReplyDeleteI spill stuff occasionally. Have you seen Twilight? You know how Bella is always falling over herself? I'm the male version. LOL
ReplyDeleteYeah - the peeing in the shoe had me laughing so hard! You definitely have to tell us what the brown stuff was - ick!
ReplyDeleteNow my girls and I together make quite a mess with all our products... make-up, shampoo, lotions. And what was I thinking wearing a white skirt yesterday, in the rain - with the dog? I had to turn it around when I got out of the car at Petsmart. You will be happy to know you don't corner the klutz market.
ReplyDeleteSpaghetti sauce! Thats whats on the wall!
ReplyDeleteThank you for the end of the day humor. I'm laughing my butt off.
ReplyDeletei spill my drinks on me....i drop food in my lap....one day my son will slowly take his bib off and say here....you need this more than me...
ReplyDeleteI knock things over all the time...if not me my butt does too! THat is too funny about Natalie peeing in your shoe...maybe she was marking her territory???
ReplyDeletePoor misunderstood Natalie... :)
ReplyDeleteI think that stain on the wall looks like mustard and ketchup smushed out of a hamburger...
I spill stuff all the time. Everywhere. It's ridiculous.
ReplyDeleteLevi peed on the floor today too... apparently I didn't get the piddle on the floor memo... that last picture looks very suspicious!
ReplyDeleteAll I have to say is this:
ReplyDeleteAt least it's not your husband peeing in your shoe!
According to him, he was sleep walking. According to me, that's no excuse. It's sick! I threw those flip flops away immediately! Apparently, I'll always be cleaning up messes--even after the kids are gone.
OH my gosh. I love your pictoral review of your messes in a day! Lol!!!
ReplyDeleteUm that last one? Looks like something I saw on CSI. You may want to interrogate your children. :)
ReplyDeletehave you been in my house? I have almost the same messes around here.
ReplyDeleteOh my gosh what was that?!
ReplyDelete(thanks for the sensoring!)
And thanks for the pop up window! You are now going to heaven!
And just think... you get to do it all again tomorrow.
ReplyDeleteSuch an exciting life we moms have, huh?
Oh... and I loathe Moon Sand. I firmly believe it was invented by none other than the Devil himself.
ReplyDeleteWow...someone who spills more than my wife.
ReplyDeleteThat last one...ick. And nothing makes me queasy. But if you figure out what it is, will you let me know? Might be able to use it for my MORBID MONDAY series!!
ReplyDeleteHallie :)
My kids are 22 and 25. I'm still finding strange messes. Add two dogs, a cat and parrot who likes to throw food (rather he drops it on the heads of the dogs foraging under his cage) the house can get pretty bad.
ReplyDeleteWhat? No playdoe in the rug?
Oh! P.S. I had a friend who's daughter used to take a dump behind the curtains. She even did it when visiting other people's homes.
ReplyDeleteShe didn't get invited over twice!
This gives me a new appreciation for my son. It really does. I plan to give him extra hugs tomorrow.
ReplyDeleteAll in a woman's day! I think you deserve a raise. Or maybe an extra shopping trip to Gymboree this month.
ReplyDeleteAs for the potty training thing, I let my little ones run around naked, or just wearing a t-shirt and big girl panties when they were learning how to pee pee on the toilet. It does work! Eventually.
It looks like food flung on the wall? I can assure you, you are not the only one who still knocks your drink over :)
ReplyDeleteI spill all the time!
ReplyDeleteAnd, the kids and the messes? Ugghh..and the pee on the floor? Ewww...and, yet, it happens here, too. And, I don't really think Izzy cares if she pees on herself.
Arrggghhh! You are so right. Yesterday I started with breakfast, cleaned up after the youngest, helped the oldest with hers, then did a second swipe of the counters only to find myself beginning on lunch immediately after finishing breakfast.
ReplyDeleteAnd potty training smotty training. My three year old son will potty on command, and then five minutes later, does it in his britches. I give up!!!
I think my 16 year old boy and border collie could compete with that.... Maybe.
ReplyDeleteSeriously hilarious post. I loved how you referred to your little girl as a puppy. I do the exact same thing with my own daughter. She is always running into a corner or a closet to pee. Half the time I end up on my butt because I did not see it coming.
ReplyDeleteGood times!
-Francesca
I'm a spiller too! Not just you!
ReplyDeleteNo wonder you don't have time or energy for weeding! I would invite the inspector in and show him...no wait bad idea you are probably infraction of house mess than. Good luck!
ReplyDelete2 things to say:
ReplyDeleteI have no kids
I have a maid
:)
They say a photo is worth a thousand words right?
ReplyDeleteBeing a mom is hard work.
I thought the last pic was pizza on the ceiling. It seems feasible to me.
ReplyDeleteI spill stuff....all. the. time. It is sad but true. And there is ALWAYS some kind of mystery mess to clean up in our house...and we don't have kids!!!
ReplyDeleteAhhhh! The shoe thing KILLED me. Thats hilarious, so sorry about your shoe though!
ReplyDeleteI'm delurking, just to let you know you're not the only klutz! I took my son to Friendly's the other day as a treat, and he ordered his drink in a big, tall glass instead of the lidded cup that I suggested. Every time he reached for it, I was all over him, "Be Careful!". Right before our food was about to be served, what did I do? Spilled my entire glass of iced tea, across the table, right in his lap! I felt terrible, but he could not stop laughing at the irony of mommy making a mess!
ReplyDeleteHahahahaha! I'm a big mess maker myself. I'm known for spilling my coffee often! LOL!
ReplyDeleteLove the mental image of your daughter peeing on your foot...
ReplyDeleteLove this idea for a post!! xx
ReplyDeleteYou might save this post to show our hubby when he gets home. It's a good one for documentation as to why you need that five day vacation to the spa!
ReplyDeleteOMG, I just found your blog for the first time this morning, and I think I hurt myself trying to contain my laughter so my boss (who I share a wall with) couldn't hear me. A photojournalist essay on spills has got to be the funniest thing I've seen in a long time (maybe because I spent 20 minutes last night cleaning up a cat hairball AND cat vomit [not the same thing] AND picking PlayDoh out of the carpet).
ReplyDeleteAnd rest assured, you're not the only grown-up spiller. My maiden name is Lockhart, and our family nickname is The Slop Carts.
I got Moon Sand awhile ago for my youngest. I'm pretty sure it's in the carpet fibers of just about every room in the house.
ReplyDeleteVery useful tips that will help not only in writing essays. Expanding vocabulary is always useful, especially for students. Perhaps it is because of this that I ask sop writing service to help me in writing my personal statement. There is no way I can write it on my own.
ReplyDelete