Monday, May 16, 2011

Will We Move?

“So I’ve been thinking: I really don’t feel like moving when I come back from Korea,” Tom said as we spoke over Skype.

I sipped my water. “That’s too bad,” I replied unsympathetically. He knew the drill: he’d come back from Korea in August and we’d move soon after.

“There might be a chance that I can take my R&R in June and move you guys. That way, I don’t have to worry about it when I get home,” Tom explained.

I froze. It was already May. I’d have to get the house ready for a move in a month? Did he forget how much STUFF we had? I know he had been gone for nine months but honestly, how could he forget the piles and piles of STUFF?

Weirdly, the next day, my phone rang and it was the housing office from Oklahoma, where we’re moving next.

She was calling to let me know she had a house for us. If we could get there in June.

I checked out the house…and people, there are walk in closets. Small, naturally, because it is military housing. But it’s a WALK IN CLOSET!

When Tom called on Skype I said, “I’m on board with the moving thing in June. So when will you be home?”

Tom chuckled. “It doesn’t work that easy.”


It was like he just spoke to me in Farsi. What did he mean it doesn’t work that easy? We had a house. With a walk in CLOSET.

“The military has to give me my orders to Oklahoma. And since my report no later than date is September, they might not want to do that,” Tom said.


Here’s the thing though: moving next month would be beneficial to us. And not because of the walk in closet.

I looked it up and their school starts the second week of August.

If we went when Tom’s orders said, we’d probably get there late August, therefore the kids would miss school.

Also, Tommy has Aspergers and needs to get into a new schedule. Missing school panics him. If he misses all that school, he’d have a meltdown.

Tom explained this to the people who do the orders in Korea.

They don’t seem to care.

They keep saying, “You’re not a priority. People are leaving before you.”

Yes. We get that. But we have a special needs kid who needs to get on a schedule. We don’t want him to miss school.

And okay, I don’t want to give up my walk in closet.

Did I mention the house was brand new? Just built?

The people who do the orders in Korea keep giving Tom the run around. “We’ll find out something next week, blah, blah blah…”

I want to fly over and knock these people over their heads with my purse. What don’t they understand? If the person were a woman, surely she’d understand the importance of a walk in closet.

But mainly, we need to get Tommy situated. Otherwise they are more than welcome to deal with his meltdown.

Plus, plane tickets get more and more expensive by the day. The military does not pay for Tom’s R&R from Korea. So that’s $2000 that WE have to pay. And that number is slowly creeping up. It’s basically wiping out our savings account.

Tom is supposed to find something out this week. I’m keeping my fingers crossed that the Air Force helps us out.

In the meantime, I’ve been cleaning and organizing just in case we DO move next month.

This is not easy.

As I said, I have a lot of stuff. Tom does too. He has these ugly jackets that he won’t let me get rid of because his Dad bought them for him. And I can’t argue, because his Dad died of a heart attack in 2002. So if I’m like, “Your dad won’t mind if I toss the leather jacket,” that sounds cruel. I can’t say, “If you ever wear that neon colored Nascar jacket, I swear, I’ll point and laugh.”

I have stuff from high school. Notebooks and old French tests with frowny faces all over them because my French teacher was a gimlet who liked to scare me. She’d claim I wasn’t TRYING to speak her language and I swear, I was, but excuse me if it wasn’t computing in my brain.

I got trapped in our garage because of all our stuff. I had to shout for Tommy and his friend to dig me out.

I’ve been feeling slightly stressed. It’s horrible to not know what is going on.

“Explain to the Air Force that—” I began while talking to Tom on Skype.

“I’ve explained. They know. It’s just if they want to help us out,” Tom cut me off.

“Tom, I was trapped in our garage because I’m trying like mad to get this house organized. The military HAS to help us,” I grumbled. I stared down at my fingernails. They were all chipped and ruined because of all the cleaning I had been doing. Where did all the stuff come from? I never realized how much we had until I started to go through it all.

“I hope they will,” Tom said. I wish he’d get upset with me. Or passionate. Something. Instead he chomped on M&Ms and said he hoped to hear something on Monday.

“Tommy needs to start school on time. I need to enroll him,” I said. That was another thing: I had called the enrollment building in Oklahoma and was told it would be in our best interest to enroll the kids in June. Otherwise it gets packed in July and August.

“I know,” Tom replied.

“Our brand new house with the walk in closet! Could be gone. FOREVER,” I said dramatically. I tried to snap my finger for emphasis but no sound emerged. I suck at snapping.

“We’ll see what happens.”


That’s what I’m doing now in between cleaning and organizing.

Waiting to see what happens.

Keep your fingers crossed for us.


  1. Crossing them now. And my toes for good measure :)

  2. Fingers crossed. I'll say a prayer on your behalf as well. Bright side: What fabulous motivation for spring cleaning!

  3. that's the hardest part of military life "hurry up and wait" seems to be their motto. keeping my fingers crossed for y'all!

  4. I hope it all works out the way you want it to. Gotta have walkin closets!! lol

  5. Good luck! Remember our men never really know what it is like from the military spouse side of things. Always hurry up and wait! Thinking of you all through this transition! Good luck! Walk in closets in military housing? WTH really? I was always jumping for joy if I had one hahaha in the Army!

  6. I hope it works out! The walk-in closet is definitely a win! I saw the military housing at Fort Knox and felt sorry for military families. They are tiny!

  7. I'll keep my thoughts with you! Just as an aside, I can't believe the military doesn't pay for one trip home when someone is deployed for a year! That seems harsh!

  8. Fingers, toes & eyes crossed for you. Well, okay, I had to uncross the eyes. Anyway, hope it all goes well and Air Force pulls their heads out and helps you!


  9. You know this is the way the military rolls. You'll be *waiting* at a complete standstill, forever, and then all of a sudden it's rush, rush, rush! Things will work out, you'll see. I do hope you get there in time for school to start because that is hard on all kids, not just special needs kids.

    He might have better luck working the angle from the other way. Call his incoming unit and see if THEY can help. You'd be surprised!!! Good luck!

  10. Yikes. All that "wait-and-see" business is one thing I do NOT miss about being an Air Force spouse.

    Here's hoping that everything falls perfectly into place for you (and especially Tommy, regarding the scheduling thing). I always wanted to live in brand new base housing, but seriously every house we lived in was old and crappy. One was demolished after we moved out, and one had so many termites we had to relocate ... ugh.

  11. Isn't the military wonderful? Good luck with everything.

  12. Saying a prayer that all will work out! :o)

  13. Good luck!! Gotta love the Air Force ;-)

  14. My husband was given PCS orders on the 12th (of May) giving us a report date of 10 June.

    Even better, they have "a strict four week" wait time at transportation to schedule a move. Therefore, we get to move ourselves.

    It's been hell already. I have been giving away stuff left and right, stuff I actually want to keep, but just don't want to move.

  15. I'm keeping my fingers crossed and saying a prayer! I could not be a milatary spouse, my stress level would be way to high. Boy, it's just one more sacrifice you guys have to make!! Thank you!! A walk in closet, do these people not have a heart!!! I guess getting your son set up in school is important too! Lol! Great post as always!

  16. I hope everything works out the way you want it to. Moving sucks under the best of conditions so I hope you have plenty of time to get it all ready.

  17. Oh I hope it gets worked out for you. I know how stressful moving can be especially when trying to organize school schedules. And walk in closets would be Awesome. I'm crossing my fingers for you!

  18. Keeping my fingers crossed that everything works out for you! =)

  19. Walk in closets ... *drool* The hubs is an army brat and he fondly (notsomuch) remembers the whole orders/moving/housing ordeal. We're empathetic ... hope it works out for you, mama!

  20. Oh that's so frustrating. The military couldn't give a rat's ass what you need though. Gees!

  21. NOthing worse than waiting. Hope you get it! And soon!!

  22. We'll be waiting for you here in OK whenever you get here :-) I hope it's June and into your walk-in closet...I mean house.

  23. I really hope things work out and you guys get to move in June! I know that would be a lot better for Tommy (and hello a new house with walk-in closets!!!!!).

    Sometimes I get frustrated with my husband when he doesn't get as upset or passionate about something that's important to me as I am. I just want to shake him and say, "Act like you care!!!"

  24. Fingers crossed! Hoping everything turns out okay!

  25. The military doesn't pay for Tom to fly back from Korea? That's crazy!!!!

    My SIL had to wait until the last possible minute for the Air Force to figure out what they were going to do with her husband. So frustrating!

    I hope you find out what is going on soon!

  26. Oh Christ, the waiting is the hardest part. When we flooded do you know how hard it was to wait for the water to come up?!? I bet a little like what you're feeling right now. Hugs to you.

  27. eek I hope they help you guys out and cut you some dang orders! It sucks you can't do anything in the military until you have those. We have moved 3 times in the last 3.5 years. Each time we have moved we throw away so much crap or give away and then we move again and I'm like wait didn't we take like two truck loads to the dump the last move..WTF! lol I actually found a canned soup that expired in 2006 on this last move! ha.

    Good Luck

  28. Ohh, I hope for you it all works out. I love the games that get played sometimes and the hurry up and then wait stuff. Moving is a pain in the arse, we are now getting ready for our PCS overseas to Japan on the 28th of this month. Good luck!

  29. well what I forgot to add in my lats comment. That canned soup I had from 2006 has been living with us for who knows how long. It came from Shreveport, La to Italy in 2007 and has been moving around northern Italy collecting dust. I think I may keep it forever because it is sitting in a box with things we need to take to the dump ..I may keep it as a reminder to not hoard stuff.

  30. Wow. Here's hoping it all works for you and you get the house with walk in closets! And it would be great if the kids could get settled BEFORE school starts.

  31. I can't believe it's already been 9 months! Gosh, time flies when it isn't your life ;)

    I really am hoping you find out within moments what's going on, because. . . wow! It's hard enough moving with NO children with a MONTH (or more) to prepare. I can't imagine how frenzied you must be feeling right now. The not-knowing would KILL me!

  32. fingers crossed.

    Want me to start a letter writing campaign? We could call it Tommy Needs to Start School ( w/ a walk in closet).

    seriously, If you you anything - SHOUT.

  33. You coming to Lawton? (I'm in Tulsa.) I wish I was closer so I could say come stay with us for a while but it would be quite a commute! Hope they be reasonable soon!

  34. Totally crossed. And toes. Just pack like you're definitely moving and hope for the best, right?

    They don't cover ANY of the R&R flight?!? That sucks. They're the AIR FORCE. They have like, tons of planes, right? They should at least cover a portion of the flight. Boooo!!!

  35. Oh jeez! The waiting/not knowing is the worst!

  36. The "Hurry up and wait" mentality of the military. Hope you get to move early AND get the walk-in closets!

  37. I really do hope it all works out for you! Waiting is the worst.

  38. Oh! Fingers crossed for you! Totally understand brand new walk in closets! And of course getting Tommy in school on time.

  39. Fingers and toes crossed for it to work out for you - it's hard to wait when things seem to be falling into place!

    Moving is tough at the best of times, and I hope you have lots of great people around to help you make it a smooth transition :)

    Love all the way from Oz xxxx

  40. I'm crossing everything I can possibly cross for you!!!
    I am SO glad to be done with all of that military stuff!!! All of the 'we'll be home this date... well, it got pushed back a month... now it's in 2 weeks' BS that they put people through! My husband (and my brother too) almost didn't make it home for our wedding!!!(*and I didn't have children to think about!) Look at me! Jerk Face has been out for about 4 years and you got me a riled up again! :)

  41. I am praying for you and your family. Totally understand about getting your son settled in school early and REALLY understand about the walk in closet!

  42. Ugh! Yea, that would drive me crazy!!

    Keeping my fingers crossed, you totally deserve that walk in closet!

  43. Good luck! A walk in closet is obviously necessary in life, don't the Air Force know that?

  44. *Fingers crossed* for you. What a frustrating situation. But I hope it all works out for school...and the walk-in closet!

  45. oh man good luck! i hope everything turns out for you guys!


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