Friday, October 28, 2011

Two Places At Once

Natalie’s teacher had sent home a letter early October stating that on the 28th, the parents ought to stay and help the kids with some pumpkin craft.

I admit, I was like, “Ugh, a craft?” Because I am not crafty. In the least. I imagined myself standing there while all the Perfect Mother’s effortlessly glued buttons and sprinkled on glitter like it was no big deal. And then there I’d be with a button accidentally glued to my cheek and glitter down my shirt.

But, obviously I was going to stay. I might hate crafts but I wasn’t about to let Natalie stand there all alone while everyone else had someone. So I said I’d be there and told Natalie, “Please don’t get upset if our project doesn’t turn out. It’s how much fun you’re having making it that counts. Not the outcome.”

Natalie was like, “I want it to be pretty.”

And I said, “Well. If not, we’ll cover the thing with sparkles.”

So yeah. I planned to be there.

But then two days ago Tommy comes home with a paper saying that he made the Teacher’s Honor Roll.

And that the ceremony was on the 28th

At 3.

The same time I’d be struggling at craft time with Natalie.

Tom couldn’t help. He had work. Unfortunately even though the Air Force is like, “Yeah, we’re family oriented!” they frown upon the only dog handler on shift going, “Can I see my kid get the Honor Roll?” Because suppose some crazy guy tries to come on the base with a bomb and Tom isn’t there to stop it?

*Le Sigh*

So it was just me.

I told Tommy, “I already promised your sister so I might not be there.”

He said it was fine but he looked sad and I immediately felt like crap and ate 3 Reeses Peanut Butter Cups to feel better.

Then I thought, “How can I be in two places at once?” I pictured an episode of Full House where Danny had to be at DJ and Stephanie’s thing and he ran from one school to the other. Granted, I don’t think it ended well. Didn’t he pass out and miss them both?

I’d probably pass out if I did that. They are in two separate schools, 10 minutes apart by CAR. I might be working out in the gym but I’m not THAT in shape. I wish I had Captain America’s powers. I watched it last night and after he got his injections he could suddenly run incredibly fast. If I had his powers, I COULD run from one school to the other with my buff chest and awesome circular shield. (Wait. There wouldn’t be a shield, would there?)

Anyway, I decided to tell Natalie’s teacher that we’d be leaving early. She seemed okay with it but I have a feeling Natalie will be miffed if we leave before finishing her pumpkin and this is more likely if I have to follow steps to make the thing. I’m awful with making ANYTHING. Even basic stuff. So I’ll probably leave with Natalie screaming in my arms while I say, “We have to get to your brother’s school. Pipe down!” and she’ll be all, “But my pumpkin IS NOT DONE YET and you wouldn’t buy me the SINGING RAPUNZEL DOLL!” Granted, that last part has nothing to do with anything but she’s been harboring anger over that one for quite some time even though I’ve explained if she behaves that Santa might bring it to her.

I haven’t promised Tommy that we’d be there just in case. I’d feel worse if I absolutely vowed that I’d be there and something happened. I told him I’d try very hard.

Wish me luck.

Have you ever had to be in two places at once?


  1. Oh that sucks!! I hope you get to see a bit of his ceremony. And good luck with the craft :)

  2. I remember that episode! Please don't pass out like Danny did. ;o)

    Since I only have the one kid, there hasn't been any memorable times where I to be two places at once, thank goodness!

  3. Maybe you'll zoom through the craft. Fingers crossed!

    I hate when I have to be two... or even three... places at once. I always feel guilty. I need to stock up on the peanut butter cups.

  4. my best friend has 4 kids & her husband left her, so she's in this predicament all the time. thankfully she has some other family members who can step in when she's can't be everywhere all at once.
    good luck!

  5. You poor thing! Good luck! I can only imagine the rock and hard place you are in - hopefully you get to do both and at the end of the day both kiddos will be happy!

  6. That's a tough one. Too bad we can't clone ourselves. I hope things work out and you can make it to both.

  7. I have never had to be in two places at once but I have had to be in 3 places at once.

    And it sucks.

  8. I go through this all the time!! I have three kids, and all are in different schools, two who should be in the same school but because of their different needs are in two different schools, both in our district, and of course neither one is the school that is less than 5 minutes from us. Our daughters school is about 15 minutes away. Each Halloween I get so freaked out trying to be at every ones Halloween parade. It was worse when our oldest was in elementary school and the youngest in preschool, because then there were 3 parades, and I have had moments when I tried to do it all, and my friends both broke down and cried one year when I rushed and just missed my son! Luckily I do live near my family and I do have friends that I set up as well with cameras just in case I miss one. Last year I missed our kindergartners parade so I could be at our daughters, but I was able to arrange it that I met up at the "party" even though parents were not invited. I'm freaking out just writing this!! The truth is we can't be at all places at all times and there will be times when one child may feel cheated. I can only hope that it builds character but just in case it doesn't I always add extra money into the the "therapy fund for all the things I did to screw you up"! Good luck!!

  9. Thank is tough. I hate when this stuff happens. Good luck.

  10. you must make tommy's honor roll ceremony! natalie can cry, she'll get over it. think how proud he'll be at his accomplishment at his new school. very well done!

  11. Yes, so I just don't go at all. "Look here guys, since I can't divide myself between you two, I'll just have to go to work." Simple and easy. LOL. Unless of course they really really demand and begged, then I'll run here and there. Just as long as they can see me. Great post.

  12. Better buy a case of peanut butter cups, and share some with both kids, that way hopefully everyone will calm down. Just don't get them used to getting pb cups or you will be in trouble. On second thought, buy some candy for them that they like and you don't, that way might be better.

  13. Good luck with making both things! There are days that I wish I could clone myself.

    Congrats on Tommy making Honor Roll! That's awesome....

  14. Whew, good luck! I am so not crafty - I would be there with glue in my hair and bandaids from all the paper cuts I would surely endure.

  15. Yep, with 4 boys they often have events scheduled at the same time. Sometimes I swear the schools do it on purpose!

  16. I am reading this at 2 p.m. central time, so right now you are embarking on your being-in-two-places-at-once adventure. Congrats to Tommy on making the honor roll; I know it's not always easy for him. I hope you make it to his ceremony. You can finish the pumpkin at home, maybe.

  17. I too have had to be in two places at once on many occasions. Never an easy task. Good Luck!

  18. so you should be at tommy's school right now. maybe she won't throw a fit because she will be in front of friends and teachers.

  19. With 4 kids, I've sometimes had to be a 4 different places at once. Sometimes I think it will be the death of me!

  20. Story of my life.

    If I could fulfill one wish, it would be a duplicator, in which I can duplicate myself, money, and that order.

    I need more of all three.

    Good lucky, mama.

  21. two places at once? Oh God, yeah. The best was when I drove out to my mother's to take her to an eye doc appt, and knew I would miss my son's similar crafting party. But the appt was important and I needed to take her.

    We were ten minutes late. TEN! And they cancelled us. So I drove all the way out there for nothing, it was way too late to get back to the school, and I was pissed as hell. We went to K-Mart, I tried not to be mad, and bought stuff I don't need that I later had to return. So yes. I wish you better luck.

  22. :( That breaks my heart! I hope you can make it to both!!

  23. Please write a blog post about that ridiculous boycott american women comment...haha. What the hell?

  24. Yeah, you can't do both, babe. You just can't. At least, not do them both WELL. Tell Tommy to make honor roll AGAIN and that you'll come to the next one. Or call his school and see if they can record it for you or something. I don't know. This is what happens when we procreate more than once...

  25. So I know it's done, and I'm sure you handled it beautifully! But what a heartbreaker of a parenting moment.

    This is kind of why I'm scared to have another kid.

  26. Like it's not easy enough to feel guilty as a mom, without adding in something like this, where you have to be in two places at one time. Hope you managed to make it to some of Tommy's ceremony.

  27. Yeah, sometimes I wish there were 3 or 4 of me. It's hard to be there for everybody sometimes. Hope you fund a solution that makes you happy.

    Thank you so much for stopping by on my SITS Day and leaving me a sweet comment. I appreciate it very much.

  28. Is it sad that I remember that episode of Full House? I don't think I've been in that situation yet, but you'll have to let me know how it all worked out. That's a really tough one. . .


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