Sunday, May 3, 2020

When Your Daughter Is Girly, And You Are Not

So, okay, my daughter has always been girlier than I ever was. She always was fascinated with makeup, and she loves to dress up. Me? Well, I rarely wear makeup and my favorite outfit consists of sweatpants and a sweatshirt. Most of the time they don't even match. I like to spend my time reading about Tudor History. Natalie loves to follow fashion trends, which is why she picked up a bucket hat and is dressing like she stepped out of the 90s.




Recently my daughter was like, "Can you pick me up some highlighter the next time you go to Walmart?" and I was like ???

Actually, I said something like, "Okay, what color? Yellow? Green?" and she was like:



It turns out she meant the makeup highlighter. I mean, how was I to know? Who wears makeup highlighter? Well, a lot of people, I guess, according to Natalie.

She teaches me a lot, my daughter. But most of the time I have no idea what she's talking about. For example, she says she wants to have aesthetic clothing, and I'm thinking, "What?"

In middle school I was terribly awkward. I had zits and basically wore leggings all the time. I didn't care about fashion. I didn't care about makeup.

My daughter? She loves her makeup, she loves her clothes, she loves her fancy nails, she even wears fake eyelashes:





I can't even put anything on my nails because of a sensory issues and the thought of fake eyelashes near my eyes makes me shudder.




Sometimes I feel guilty that I'm not more girly. Wouldn't she have so much fun with a mom who loves fashion, manicures, pedicures, and understands completely what a highlighter brush is?





I love books and history. That's what I understand. Sweatpants I get. Wearing the same pair of shoes for years I understand.

But.

But.

Sometimes I see a glimpse of me in Natalie. Sometimes she wants discuss history. She likes history. Her middle name is Elizabeth for Elizabeth I and sometimes I'll tell her about Elizabeth I and her mother Anne Boleyn and she'll listen while resting her head on my shoulder, twirling a loose strand of my hair absently around her finger.




We might be different. But somehow, we get each other. 




38 comments:

  1. Very cute, my daughter is more girly than I am too!

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  2. Your daughter reminds me of mine. she is very into makeup and all kinds of hair and face products. I am more like you in sweats and a tee shirt.

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  3. I used to be really girly but am less so now. I can imagine this could be a struggle but it sounds like you two have worked things out!

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  4. My mum and I are incredibly different! We may look the same, but I'm very creative and artsy whereas she's linear thinking but we are incredibly close, our differences just give us something to talk about

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  5. Such a great post. I am very different from my mom, we have learned to find common ground and understand our differences but I can only imagine what she tought of me as I was growing up...

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  6. This is such a sweet post you got each other and that is what matters most.

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  7. Sweet post <3 My daughter can school me on makeup. She is super girly at times but then is happy in sweats with no makeup at other times. I guess like me in that sense :)

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  8. I'm not girly at all! I would have responded the same way as you "What colour of highlights??!" My mother and I are completely different. Sadly our relationship broke apart and I've since been left having little to no contact with both her and my sister back home.

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  9. I can relate because I am not girly at all and my two little ones are very interesting in nail polish and makeup currently. It's hard sometimes, but as long as you show you care, that's all that matters :-)

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  10. My youngest daughter is the girliest.. makeup, cute clothes, the works. I have no idea what I'm doing either when it comes to buying makeup! I had to buy highlighter.. or maybe it was concealer.. in a tube.. wasn't quite sure what I was doing.

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  11. I am actually more girly than my girls, lol. But they had lots of brothers to be tomboyish around. And I can be a tomboy as well. It all works out in the end.

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  12. Lol, this is actually interesting. Glad that no matter the differences, there is still that mom and daughter bond.

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  13. My daughter wanted to wear makeup when she was in middle school. Since my makeup repertoire was limited to mascara only, I took her in for a makeup session at Macy's. She loved it and I felt relieved that she learned how to put it on properly. She never seemed to care that I was all about comfort, but she is happy to give her input when I ask for fashion advice. Like you and Natalie, we have a lot of other things to bond over.

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  14. This was the opposite for my daughter and me. My daughter hated doing her hair and I wanted her to have it styled

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  15. I agree, it’s more important that you guys get each other. I love that you’re such a super cool mom.

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  16. I was lucky my daughter was girly like me. I'll take your daughter for a mani/pedi, shopping, etc!

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  17. Aww that's okay! You have such a wonderful daughter and a really pretty one. I'm glad that she is enjoying the things that she love.

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  18. this is funny and cute! you really have to adjust and let her adjust sometimes too. haha it's a give and take. sooner or later, she will understand that. :D

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  19. She is such a doll. Yeah for girly girls. Let her be who she wants to be...I know you will.

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  20. Very interesting story. I didn't know that girls get into cosmetics so young nowadays!

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  21. Good one... Yes, it can be surprising how daughters can be so different from their Moms. My daughter for example is not girly at all, she dislikes pink and she enjoys picking up oversized clothes from the men's department. However, she is very much into art unlike me.

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  22. I'm not girly too. I do love fashion but I am not into make-up. My nieces are girly like her, though and they sure do love their make-up. -LYNNDEE

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  23. I ma not girly at all. My mom and sisters are definitely more girly compared to me. I just don't have that typical girl attitude. but I like who I am and I think that's what matters..!!

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  24. Loved this! I am like you I had no idea what a highlighter was! At least you have someone to teach you! I'll be lost forever.

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  25. Ahaha, this my sister and I. I am not girly and bad at doing my makeup, but my sister is a makeup queen.

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  26. I love this! I think too many parents put pressure on trying to mold their child into a mini version of themselves rather than embracing their differences. I love that you recognize the ways you differ while also noticing the similarities, and clearly loving her for all of it. It's a beautiful example of a genuine mother/daughter relationship.

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  27. This is how my sister and I are. She is into all the girly things and I cannot do it. I love her so much though!

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  28. Such a strong bond between mothers and daughters...we are both into girly things and love it!

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  29. Awww, this was such a heartwarming post to read. It doesn't matter that you don't have the girly stuff in common, you have other things that make your relationship special, which others don't.

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  30. Such a sweet post, the highlighter comment made me laugh!

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  31. Such a sweet post. You're perfect the way you are even if you're not a girly :)

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  32. I like when a girl is girly. It's so cute to see that. I hope my girls will be the same!

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  33. You both look so cute! I am in the same boat. My girl is so girl and I am not!

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  34. I totally get it. I pride myself on being all-terrain and my daughter has always been a Disney princess girl. I don't mind at all though, she's her own person, and she's also fearless and will try anything!

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  35. You both compliment each other! She teaches you make-up & you teach her history, that's absolutely adorable!

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  36. this is us right now with my 4 year old....she is so cute and girly but also has a tomboy side....me, i'm a total tomboy!!!

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  37. It was perfect the first time. I learn so much from you as well! Great post.

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Thanks for the comment!

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