Um, wow. Today is my son Tommy's birthday. I have a kid who is 19. And I guess Tommy really is not a kid anymore. He's technically an adult, which is bizarre to me. Right now he loves to say "I'm the same age you are when you had me." He can't imagine having a baby at 19. Heck, I couldn't imagine having a baby at 19.
It will always be a shock to me when my kids grow up. But there are some pretty cool things about 19-year-olds.
1. They are ready to grow up, but not completely.
2. They still eat a ton.
3. They don't always do laundry.
4. They might not be ready to move out. I would never push my son to move out. Granted, he has autism, so it's slightly different, but I'm always baffled when families say they expect their kids to be gone at 18.
5. Giving them independence isn't always easy on the parent. It's still weird when he's at a doctor's appointment that I'm not even asked anything. Since Tommy is an adult, everything goes through him.
6. Mistakes will be made. Tommy recently broke the screen of his MacBook. But he used his money to pay for his mistake.
7. Yup! They have their own money. Tommy doesn't have a job yet, but he goes to college. He tends to save most of the money he gets for Christmas and birthday so he has money in the bank.
8. Cooking to them probably means making a sandwich or Cup-O-Noodles.
9. They still enjoy celebrating birthdays. I mean, they're still young so they don't dread it. And they know they'll probably get money, which they always need.
10. They are still silly when taking photos.
11. Sometimes you might have to remind them about proper deodorant usage.
12. Video games are probably a big part of their lives.
13. They might not drive. Tommy has autism and perhaps will never drive.
14. Spongebob is still hilarious to them. Tommy used to watch the show when he was tiny and would call it "Bob Bob." He still watches the show.
15. Remember: their brains aren't fully formed so forgive them for immaturity. (However, farts ARE funny.)
16. Always include them. They might be adults, but extend an invitation whenever activities are planned. Maybe they won't be able to make it. But they'll feel good that they weren't forgotten just because they are an adult.
17. Let them figure out problems. I have to step away when my son is struggling at times. It's HARD. But I can't solve everything. I won't always be here. Sometimes Tommy might have to fail and learn lessons on his own.
18. They treat you to meals! Hey, they have money. You never know when they'll say "Dinner is on me!"
19. They still need their parents. Sometimes they might act like they don't, but they do. And they appreciate you being there if they need it.
When I was 19 I had a kid. Tommy at 19 is focusing on college and getting his degree. I am extremely proud.
19 is a good age.
Happy birthday and great advice!
ReplyDeleteThis is such a wonderful advice, Happy 19th Birthday Tommy!
ReplyDeleteI have to admit my daughter will be 20 this year and though she has a lot to learn is growing up fast. It is scary to think I might be a grandma soon.
ReplyDeleteThey grow up so fast. I have one that will be 31 this year. My youngest is going to be 13.
ReplyDeleteI hope he had a bloody great birthday, 19 was so long ago for some of us
ReplyDeleteHappy birthday to your son. I'm with you. So long as my kiddos are productive and respectful, they can stay at home as long as they want to.
ReplyDeleteWow, my oldest daughter is now 18 turning 19 in a few months. It seems like it was yesterday when I was taking her to preschool. They grow up fast, thanks for sharing!
ReplyDeleteIt's great that he could save money on his own.
ReplyDeleteHappiest birthday to your son, I'm 25 and yes, spongebob is still funny and I still don't drive, guarantee I have a license but I hate driving with passion so it's usually my younger sister or my mom who drive me around XD
ReplyDeleteAww happy birthday to him!!! They grow up so fast!
ReplyDeleteawesome advice. This post reminded me of my 19s. Can now make out how difficult it can be for parents.
ReplyDeleteHa, great tips. Mine aren't that age yet and they eat loads. It sounds like he's going to do well with his focus on schooling.
ReplyDeleteIt was interesting to read the tips about your son turning 19. Our children age so quickly. But it is nice to read stories about other parents experiencing the same thing.
ReplyDeleteHappy birthday!!!! this is such great advise I cant wait to have kids one day
ReplyDeleteHappy Birthday to him I can't believe that they grew up so fast
ReplyDeletehappy birthday to him. Hope he had a wonderful 19th birthday
ReplyDeleteyes! They still need their parents and they will always need them. And this is the most important part!
ReplyDelete