Sunday, June 19, 2022

Taking Photos Is Awkward

Okay, so I rarely take photos of myself. And I know I should because, you know, MEMORIES, but I always look so awkward in photos. Think Chandler in that episode of Friends where Monica wants a nice engagement photo and he's there looking incredibly....bizarre. That's basically me. 

Anyway, I turned 40 today, the 19th, and I thought I should get some photos. On Instagram women seem to effortlessly share photos of themselves looking amazing. Granted, yes, I know they probably picked that one out of 20 pics that were taken, but still. I wanted a nice Insta shot. I thought I could have a photo where I looked excited being 40. Even though I'm slightly terrified. But mostly excited because I hear the 40s are the best. But kind of scared because I don't have the money for Botox and if my face melts I can't afford a face lift. 

I had my daughter take the photos because when my son does it I look even more awkward because he doesn't understand angles. Neither does my husband. I'm like "move the camera around so you can catch other angles" and they're like "What?" 

Here's how the first photo came out:

I look like an over-excited pelican. Also, I said to take the photo from the knees UP because I still had on blue socks and my sneakers. I usually wear my sneakers when I have a dress on by the way because I can't do heels and I'm most comfortable in sneakers. 

I tried again.

"I feel like you should close your mouth," my daughter suggested.


I mean. I sort of look like a NBA player has walked up beside me and I'm staring up at him.

Again. You see my sneakers. But I can crop those out. Also I thought it would be cute to grip my crown like "ooo I'm 40, lalala" but now I see it looks...well, awkward. (You can get your own crown from Amazon here)

Then I decided that I'd squat down and gaze up into the camera as models do and it's just...I just..well..and there I go gripping the crown again.

I decided squatting wasn't working so I stood up (and something made a CRACKING sound almost like my body was like "welcome to your 40s") and was in the middle of explaining what I wanted to do when Natalie snapped away. I look like a broken zombie from The Walking Dead. "AHHH, bring Rick back, the show makes no sense now, ahhhh"


I thought, okay, I'll leave the crown alone, and this one isn't half bad. Thank goodness you can't see my pits. 

Finally, I decided to do simple shots where I wasn't A) gripping my crown and B) acting like an overcaffeinated monkey. I thought I could do a sultry "i'm so sexy" shot but I ended up looking constipated:

This shot wasn't TOO bad:

And this one basically looks like the above one but I was pleased that I didn't look like a crazy street loon. One of these will be my Insta shot. Yay!

I'm 40 now. Send chocolate. Oh, and my newly 40 year old advice? Take the pictures. You might look deranged but still. They're memories. Even if you do resemble Nick Nolte's mugshot in some of them. (Google if confused.)


  1. Happy birthday! You look great!

  2. Happy birthday you look good for 40

  3. Have a wonderful birthday with a lot of joy and love. you look so amaing.

  4. You do not look awkward in those photos! You look so happy and beautiful! Happy Birthday!

  5. I love your sense of humor. The last one is definitely my favorite. Damn I love your hair! Happy belated birthday!!!

  6. Happy happy birthday you look absolutely amazing and I really love your sense of humor

  7. Happy birthday! And thanks for sharing your photo shoot with us in all of its awkward glory, you looked fabulous AND like you had a load of fun!

  8. Happy Birthday! You look awesome at 40!

  9. These pictures are awesome! It really looks like you are a natural. Have a very happy birthday.

  10. Happy Birthday! Welcome to the 40s! I turned 40 last year -- no photoshoot for me. You're too funny, your photos all look so happy.

  11. Cute Birthday photos for certain she has such a way with the camera it love her!

  12. You're so funny! I think these seem to capture your spirit and personality well! I don't know you but you seem like such a fun person. Happy Birthday!!!

  13. You are absolutely adorable and I wouldn’t change a thing about you and your wonderful self! I am totally awkward in front of the camera too so I often “forget” to be in the shot and put my kids in there instead. Happy 40th to you!!

  14. I don't like me in the photos. I delete a lot of them. But they are still memories so I need to accept them!

  15. Taking photos can be awkward but looks like you were having so much fun and that's the most important thing. :) Happy 40th! -LYNNDEE

  16. You photos came out great. I do agree the ones that you took above the knee, leaving out the shoes, look the best. I love the last few the best where you were against the fence and she didn't show your knees at all. I'm like you. I hate taking photos.

  17. Those are such cute birthday photos of you! Happy 40th to you 😍😍 You look absolutely amazing and glowing ❤️ Love your dress and crown ❤️❤️

    Everything Enchanting :)

  18. There are a lot of great pics in the bunch! You look great, and it's good you have some nice photos to enjoy!


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