Monday, October 13, 2008

Stunned and Shocked

I woke up stunned.

Could it be?

Did it really happen?

Was I seeing things?

I blinked a few times and even rubbed my eyes.

I focused again.

And yes.

The same thing.

Tom had changed the toilet paper roll!

This may not seem like a big deal to most people.

But it is to me.

I'm married to a man who has been known to pile the trash into a mountain and claim that since the trash wasn't spilling to the ground that he didn't have to take it out just yet.

I'm married to a man who drops his dirty clothing a few feet from where the laundry basket sits.

I'm married to a man who, if he uses the last of the toilet paper roll just grabs another one and then sets it on top of the toilet. Instead of taking a few seconds to snap it back onto the dispenser. So I'll wander in and stare angrily at the empty cardboard roll and shout out angrily, "TOMMMMMMMM!"

Who, by the way, always seemed genuinely shocked that I was irritated by this.

"I got a new roll out," he would point out.

"But it's not on the DISPENSER!" I shrieked.

Tom would shrug. "Does it matter if it's on the dispenser or not?"

Actually yes. It really does.

A few times he's used the last of the toilet paper roll upstairs. And we rarely have spare rolls up there so one time I was in a bit of a quandry when I reached for the toilet paper and discovered there was none to be had.

I had to call Tom up to bring me a new roll.

And I'm not really a fan of letting him see me use the toilet so I was a tad embarrassed when he strolled in with one. I'm always baffled how people can let their mate brush their teeth while they're using the john. I mean no thank you! Maybe I just had the whole PRIVACY thing embedded into my head as a child.

I've embedded it into Tommy, who freaked out once when I walked in on him going.

"YOU STOLE MY PRIVACY!" he screamed at me.

Oh. Well EEK. Sor-ry.

Tom, well, stared at me for a few seconds and I was all, "Nothing to see here. Get out!" while motioning for him to leave with my hand.

I mean I'd be concerned if he was turned on by me sitting on the POT for heavens sake.

But this morning...

There was a NEW roll on the dispenser.

Maybe he's learning. Maybe the rules that I posted on the fridge are working.

When he wakes up later I'm going to praise him for it. He probably won't even know what I'm talking about. He rarely does.

I'll be all, "Because you changed the toilet paper roll I'm making your favorite sour cream chicken!"

Of course then he might say, "Um. Weren't you going to make that anyway? You told me so yesterday before I left for work."

And I'll pat his head and say, "Yes but that's BESIDE the point. Now I'm REALLY going to make it!"

Which will just confuse the crap out of him but he won't argue because all he wants his his danged sour cream chicken.

I have another announcement.

Gymboree is having a sale tomorrow.

This is from the e-mail I received about it:

**Red Balloon Sale is happening tomorrow! They don't call it that anymore but we all know the deep discounts!! I was told it was from the transition line and back for the summer items. Some stores got boxes upon boxes in so have fun digging through those bins!! Price points will be the .99 - 9.99. It will be online as well :) Cookie magazine coupon - ladies check your receipts if you are using the $15 off $50 coupon in stores. They are taking 20% off instead which is less of a discount for any purchase under $75! New Coupon in the November Parenting Magazine - 20% off and good til Dec 20th.**

I will be there of course.

Though I doubt my store has much.

But I'll pop in even if it means that I have to take both children with me.

Tommy has today and tomorrow off of school. He will not be pleased about going to Gymboree but I'll totally bribe him.

"Tommy. If you let Mommy shop in Gymboree for ten minutes I'll get you McDonalds.."

(I know. Jo Frost is shaking her head at me. In my defense though he only ever wants the plain hamburger Happy Meal with the apple dipper things. And he doesn't drink the soda, remember. Dude only drinks water and looks offended if you offer him anything else.)

"Make it five and you gotta deal!" Tommy might answer.

FIVE minutes!

Kid, I won't be done searching through one rounder in FIVE minutes.

Lucky for me he still doesn't know how to tell time so after twenty minutes I'll be all, "Okay, it's been five minutes!"

Speaking of Tommy he was looking through his book about the solar system. It's an older book so it had that Pluto was a planet. Tommy noticed this and went, "Mommy! What IS this?"

And he looked really offended and such because he knows his planets and PLUTO was not part of them.

I explained that Pluto was once considered a planet but not anymore.

"Those darn scientists," Tommy said with a shake of his head. Then he took a black marker and Xed out Pluto.

Tomorrow Natalie also has her 18-month-appointment. I'm curious on how much she weighs now.

I'm betting only 18 pounds. She's my little bean.

I have to take Tommy with me because even though tomorrow is one of Tom's days off, he has training.

Tommy is all, "Is Natalie gonna cry?"

"Probably," I admitted. She hates when the doctor has to *gasp* TOUCH her.

"Oh great," Tommy said with a roll of his eyes.

I better go make us some lunch. Tommy is requesting eggs.

Tonight the new season of Little People, Big World is on.

Love that show.

Wish I could go to Roloff Farm.


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