Wednesday, November 30, 2011

Why I Don't Do Elf on a Shelf




I don’t like when dolls appear like they are staring at me.

It weirds me out to the point where I turn them around so they face the wall.

Or I cover them with a blanket.

Sometimes they’ve been known to get lost in the garage.

This is why I do not do Elf on a Shelf.

Elf on a Shelf, for those who don’t know, is this thing:


It’s supposed to watch your kids and make them behave. Or something. And then it reports back to Santa.

The parent is supposed to change the elf position daily.

First of all, I’d forget to do this. I have enough to do this holiday season than worry about an elf.

Second of all, can we say creepy? Look at those eyes! (Hello, Chucky!)



I wouldn’t want those eyes staring at me. (Hello, clown from IT!)

And those eyes are supposed to REPORT BACK TO SANTA. (Hello, evil doll that haunted an entire family on a show on the SyFy channel!)

Third, my kids would mock the elf. They wouldn’t buy the story. I’d find the poor elf in an awful place like the toilet. Or…shudders…MY BED!

So no, thank you.

I’ll continue to use my old threat that continues to hold up to this day:

“I know Santa’s phone number and I’ll call him if you’re naughty and then, well, no presents for you.”


**Well, update. I bought one, but only because it was incredibly cheap on Amazon. It still creeps me out and I still write about how it creeps me out. I even messed it up when we got it. Check out that post here.**

33 comments:

  1. Yeah, I don't do Elf on the Shelf either. Just not that into it.

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  2. I use the calling Santa threat, too. If everyone who said they were going to call Santa actually did, his phone would be ringing off the hook.

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  3. OK- that's officially C-R-E-E-P-Y.
    I don't blame you- and why why why do parents feel like they have to lie anyway? Or subdue by fear?

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  4. Creapy I have never heard of it until now and I would never do it myself

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  5. hahah!!!

    I don't know... I think I could have used Elf on the Shelf about 10yrs ago. totally wouldn't work on a 17yr old...

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  6. It really is working for us. Annabele totally is into it. I actually posted all about it today.

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  7. Thank you , I'm not alone! A friend of mine made it look like her elf got in to grits and it made a mess. I'm sorry but I'm the one that has to clean up...no thank you. I have enough to deal with minus a creepy elf that gets into trouble all the time! ;)

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  8. I think probably a lot of other lame christmas traditions start when a company decides "A Christmas Tradition" would make a good ad slogan for their piece of crap chucky doll.

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  9. I am Ducky... I am a PROUD ELF ON A SHELF-ER!

    THERE...I said it!

    We actually love it. My kiddo is three though and just getting into all of the holiday thrills. She named her elf and talks to her. Its a great motivator to get out of bed early in each morning to see where she has returned to. Irishman hates it...he is with you. He swears the thing is a demon and I will wake up with it staring at me from the foot of the bed. *shrug* I never bought into that chucky doll crap or saw any of the movies so he can keep his demons. :O) Me and LilDuck are enjoying giggling over the magic of our Elf and what secrets she may be sharing with Santa (like it wasn't REALLY the dog that farted)

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  10. We use the "We have Santa on speed dial" rouse too. Our almost 14 yr old has not fallen for that one for years, but our 5 year old is totally on board. Hee hee.

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  11. This really made me laugh! And I think you're right. The whole "the elf is watching you" thing is waaaaaay too creepy!

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  12. I TOTALLY agree with you. the elf is scary!!

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  13. My mom keeps trying to buy me one of these and I just don't want it. I feel bad enough lying about Santa I know I'm a weirdo...

    Until now I've never looked closely at one. You are totally right this thing is creepy looking!

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  14. I've never even HEARD of this. But the whole idea is freaking me out. Ooooh. If that creepy little bastard was on my shelf I would totally feed him to the dog. Guess who's on the naughty list?

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  15. But it's not a doll, it's an elf! LOL! Every yuletide an "elf" exactly like the ones stores are presently threatening children and anyone else who could be watched by Santa with, but instead ours is the one I kept back from my own childhood Christmas days (daze?), comes early to pay a season-long visit in SparkleFarkleville. He's a good guy whose only job is to keep away the humbugs. Mr Elf. I guess it's all in how you look at him.

    Merry, merry!
    SparkleFarkle~~~~~*

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  16. I flash back to old Twilight Zone episode with the ventriloquist dummy that had worn spots on it's shoe soles - no thanks.

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  17. If I was a mom I don't think I would do that tradition either. It says it's a well known family tradition but this has been the first year I've heard about it, and I'm hearing about it all over. I supposed it's because they had the Christmas special on ABC or something this past weekend. I saw it on the listings and was like there's that thing again! lol :c)

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  18. We don't do it either. Not a thing in NZ!! :)

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  19. Somehow I managed to not know about this creepy elf. I'd heard the name; just thought it was a book. Yeah, retailers, we'll decide on our own traditions, thank you.

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  20. I've never even heard about this "tradition" till a few weeks ago. kinda weird. I don't think I'll be doing it for my kids either.

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  21. I am with you in that I would totally forget about it too. But once they know what they want for Christmas you better believe I use that to my advantage.

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  22. CREEPY!!! I don't do it either. Bud asked me if Santa knew more than God the other day. That was an awkward conversation to have with a 5 year old.

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  23. I thought I was the only one who thought those elves were creepy as hell! My kids are too old for them thankfully, but I can see them giving it to the dog to use as a chew toy or something. lol

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  24. Umm I totally agree. Someone asked me if I got my son one, and I had no clue what it was. I saw it in the Hallmark store and thought I can't have that thing judging me all holiday season.

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  25. That is totally funny. Have never heard of this elf until your post. It is a little scary. LOL.

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  26. I have seen the Elf On The Shelf but I have never really known what they are all about. The whole moving it around would creep me out...really did I leave it there? Did I leave it like that? Did he just wink at me? Yea that would be a no go in my house too!

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  27. Chucky nails it-- too creepy for me! Santa knows all without any elf snitches!

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  28. OHMYGAWD!!! I hate this thing!!!!! Totally creeps me out too! No way would I buy it and use it!

    Bella is pretty good anyway. And she gets better as she gets older. Which is wonderful because we thought about trading her in when she was little and refused to sleep at night.

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  29. I agree very creepy. And I'm pretty sure my kids would do really evil things to the elf...just because it was telling on them.

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  30. My sister-in-law calls them creepy but she has one at her house. They are sold out in my neck of the woods.

    LisaDay

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