Friday, December 7, 2012

Why We Don't Do Elf On The Shelf. Part 2.

I thought about getting it. I really did. I even picked up the box and hovered it over my cart.

But then I thought about the eyes.

The creepy eyes.

And I put the box back.

I couldn’t do it.

Elf on the Shelf still freaked me out. Plus, let’s be honest. I wouldn’t remember to change the elf every night. Sometimes I barely remember to make the kid’s lunches. By the end of the evening the last thing I would want to do is position the creepy thing. Yes, there are sites dedicated to different ideas, and I’m sorry, a lot of those ideas look messy. Like pretending the elf made an angel in the flour? No. That’s something else I’d have to clean up.

Did I mention the eyes? (I wrote about the eyes last year when I was explained why we don't do Elf on the Shelf.)

I feel like they’re following me.

And personally, if I were a kid, I’m not sure I’d like a plastic thing reporting back to Santa if I did something wrong.

Look, I have this constant fear that I’m being watched. The webcam on our computer? I feel like someone is watching and reporting what’s going on. Tom thinks I’m ridiculous. But you never know! It’s a crazy world we live in.

This pillow basically sums up how I feel:

See? I’m not the only one who finds it creepy. I know some parents are like, “Oh, it’s adorable!” and I’m thinking, “Are we talking about the same thing?”

Maybe one year I’ll get brave and buy one. The kids would probably really enjoy it although Natalie would probably constantly beg me to let her take it to her room. She already sneaks her princess ornaments up there.

“They want to sleep in my bed!” she’ll insist. “They love me!”

Right now we’re NOT an Elf on the Shelf family.

And honestly, I’m fine with that.

(But if we were, I’d be tempted to do inappropriate things. Like have the elf surrounded by booze bottles. Or sleeping in my bra. So not kid friendly.)


  1. haha I had him dangling from the chandelier and my husband was like awesome we have a suicidal elf. details.

  2. Elf's are evil and must be watched at all times. They tend to hang with the faieries who if left alone with take one of your children and put one of their ugly ones in their place. These are "changelings" So at a minimum the elf must be handcuffed to a sturdy kitchen cabinet. Hanging by one arm is fine. I'm Irish, I should know

  3. It's Not my cup of tea either. Not entirely sure if I have a moral stance on it or its just plain laziness.

  4. Ours is sitting in the tree. Where he has been for 2.5 weeks now. Because "he likes that spot!" and I am way too lazy to move him.

    But, I am doing this thing this week that I found online where he comes back from Santas workshop with magic seeds (tic tacs) that you plant in a bowl of sugar over night and the next day sugar cookies grow from it. I think it's a cute idea. :P

    That's about as crafty as I get.

  5. LOL, this is too funny! Thanks for stopping by my blog this week! :)

  6. He's hanging out in our bathroom today. I accused him of being a creeper, which the kids thought was hysterical!! I, too, am horrible about remembering to move him. I've made my husband get in on the "fun" this year!

  7. I'm cracking up! I could have written the post myself!! hahah! Love it!

  8. I think it's a fun idea, but the effort it would take to actually get done has kept me from trying. I have a hard enough time getting everything else that needs to e done around here taken care of with out having a little elf put even more demands on my time.

  9. Just noticed on your profile that you enjoy eating Reeses Peanut Butter Cups... come on over to my house, I just filled the dish about 30 minutes and Hubby and I have not finished them off yet.

    Oh, and those elves are creepy. *shudder*

  10. This wasn't around when mine was small. I like the idea of it, but putting the actual effort into it? Not my cup of tea. But I do love all the inappropriate Elf on the Shelf ideas out there; those are hilarious!

  11. Creeps me out too....glad my daughter is too old for that craziness! Happy weekend!

  12. While I don't share your views on the elf I do share them on the webcam. I keep mine closed, then unplugged, and sometimes I toss a kitchen towel over it. Hubs told me that the government watches you through it. I'm more concerned about aliens...D:

  13. LOL We are also so not Elf on the Shelf people! I just know I would forget to move it around..or worse, I would get caught doing it!

  14. I feel guilty enough lying about Santa. My overly burdened conscience can't handle the elf too!

  15. Haha I love this post! We aren't doing elf on a shelf this year.. but I am totally going to do it next year! That pillow is pretty awesome :D

  16. We don't do it either! Im glad I am not the only one!

  17. Too much pressure. I mean, EVERY NIGHT? Every night he has to be in a new position, and be adorable or some weird crap?

    Hellz no. They get Christmas morning. That should be enough.

  18. We don't do it, either. It creeps me out. And I don't get the elf misbehaving, either.

    Having said that, have you looked at all of the #inappropriateelf pictures/posts...that's something I could get behind!


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