Period.
Menstruation.
Aunt Flo.
The curse.
There are many names for a menstrual cycle and I have always been open to my daughter about them. I always told her it was nothing to be ashamed about. I knew she was getting frustrated that it hadn't happened for her yet. It started happening to many of her friends in fifth grade, which is shocking to me, because I didn't start until seventh grade.
I was all, "You're like Margaret in Are You There God, It's Me Margaret. She was so desperate for her period and bigger boobs. We must, we must, we must increase our bust!"
Natalie looked at me like:
But I reminded her that her time WOULD come.
And it did.
On Thanksgiving.
She's in seventh grade and has been carrying around pads since sixth "just in case." She would pass them out to friends who needed them without embarrassment because I always taught her it was no big deal.
Some of her friends loved this.
Others?
"Oh my gosh Natalie, you can'd show a PAD in public! There are BOYS around!"
Natalie was all, "So? It's just a period. Nothing to be ashamed about." And to a boy walking by and staring she was all, "Do you need a pad?"
She said he turned red and hurried along.
So yeah. She started her period and it's NOT A BIG DEAL. She doesn't get the people who want to be discreet.
She proudly sported this pin and has even brought the a plush uterus to school. (Buy the pin here and the uterus here.)
(One boy asked if it was a brain. I mean ???)
Natalie even had a period party. There was an article on Parents asking if these were necessary. Some people were like, "Ew, gross!" Others were like, "That should be private." But most were all, "Yeah, if the kid wants one!"
And my kid wanted one. She's not embarrassed. She's proud. (I told her if she were in Gilead she'd be married off soon after and she was mortified at that. "What? I still play with DOLLS sometimes! MARRIED? REALLY?")
So let's tell our girls it's nothing to be embarrassed about. It's a natural occurrence. Yeah, if the girl is naturally shy it might be hard for her to talk about. But Natalie just tells her friends like that to not be ashamed.
"Be proud of what your body can do!" she'll say.
Yes. Be proud.
Not ashamed.
Posts
I wish I had prepared my daughter for this day. She too was in 7th grade and it was a tough day for her. Now she is married and having kids
ReplyDeleteI was a bit surprised by your article... Yes I agree that we should talk about the subject openly, I just felt strange seeing the red stuff on the photo.
ReplyDeleteWhat red stuff??! On the cake? It's sprinkles. No biggie.
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ReplyDeleteI think it's the craziest thing I've ever read, but at the same time the most beautiful. Maybe I should have faced it the same way!
Well, we had a poop party when my son first pooped in the potty, so why not?
ReplyDelete😃
DeleteI remember when I got my first period I was SO embarrassed. AND THEN it got out to the entire 7th grade. Ugh. It's so much better to know it's not an embarrassing thing.
ReplyDeleteOh, I love how you educated her that it's not a big deal. I remember my mom telling me the same thing, but as a child, I was still embarrassed.
ReplyDeleteI see no reason why a girl can't have a period party. Are we supposed to hide it from the public, even though there are NUMEROUS ads and commercials promoting periods? I think not!
ReplyDeleteYes, exactly!!
DeleteI love this! I hope I can encourage this with my own daughters.
ReplyDeleteThis is such an important topic to discuss when you have girls. The sooner the better!!
ReplyDeleteI love that you are so open to her about it! It's definitely not something we should be ashamed to talk about.
ReplyDeleteYou raised a strong young lady. I like that you taught her how to approach other students, because I know that school is no joke. It's nice to see how you support her every step of the way! I was so embarrassed when I got my first period.
ReplyDeleteWow, this is awesome! It's great how you prepared your daughter really well for this day, and educated her that it's not a big deal. I wish I was prepared when I got my first period. It wasn't a topic that is openly talked about back then. - Ola
ReplyDeleteI didn't start until I was 14 and I was so proud I remember telling my parents "I'm a woman now"!
ReplyDeleteI think this is great. My daughter has anxiety about getting her period for the first time so this would definitely make things more light hearted.
ReplyDeleteThis is such a great way to spread awareness to our daughters regarding on how to deal with their menstruation. Thanks for sharing this!
ReplyDeleteI think you are the coolest mom ever! I'm totally doing this for my daughter when I have one. I wished my mom had talked about something so natural with me. It would have prepared me and made it way less traumatizing. Thank you for sharing this and your congrats to your daughter!
ReplyDeleteYour daughter is awesome. I love how not-embarrassed she is about this. A period party ... that's funny and awesome. I remember when I started mine, I told my mom NOT to tell my brother because he would probably talk about it in front of my cousins. Had I had her attitude, it would have been no big deal.
ReplyDeleteI love this, good for her for being so open about it!
ReplyDeleteFunny how at one point in our lives we really wanted to get it and after a few years we start getting sick of having to experience it every month. I'm glad she's not ashamed of it, girls shouldn't feel the need to hide the fact that they have their period.
ReplyDeleteI love this! I think it's great that she's so open about it. I think that's the way it should be. Nobody should have to be embarrassed about it.
ReplyDeleteSo true we all want to get it and then it happens then we wish it didn't. Great read !!!
ReplyDeleteI like seeing it as a celebration rather than a curse. it is funny how most of us can not wait to get it, to fit in or feel normal or whatever, then when it comes it is not long before we wish it would go away! haha
ReplyDeleteWhen my daughters & niece started theirs we made it into a celebration. We had a movie day and each one was gifted the Are You There God It's Me Margaret book which has become a favorite of all. My granddaughter is only 5 but she'll get the same book and celebration day. My daughter says it was her favorite tradition. (Rena)
ReplyDeleteI didn't have my menstruation until I was 13 and I was embarrassed at first. And I didn't know it was called the curse until my husband told me. :)
ReplyDelete-LYNNDEE
I never thought of it being a shameful thing at all. The issue for most women is the pain when it does happen and for some the issue of endometriosis is just unreal. I have 2-3 articles on my blog from 2017 related to the same topic.
ReplyDeleteThis. Is. Awesome. I am so impressed with her and how not-ashamed she is! And good job, mamma! That's all on you!
ReplyDeleteI started early. I remember it happened during house party. I was so scared and ashamed, didn't know what to do.
ReplyDeleteI have all boys so I won't experience this. However, I do remember when mine started, I was embarassed, in a lot of pain, and definitely didn't get a party. Thank goodness now girls don't have to experience those emotions.
ReplyDeleteI am so impressed by your daughter. My girl started hers a few months ago (7th grade, as well) and while I wouldn't say she's embarrassed, she certainly is not walking in pride, either. I am glad that the discussion is opening up and the stigma lessening.
ReplyDeleteLove the idea of a period party! Your daughter has such a good attitude about it all.
ReplyDeleteThis is a great way to welcome your daughter to womanhood. Glad she had fun with it, too.
ReplyDeleteOmg I love this! A great way to let her know its normal and keep communication open!
ReplyDeleteYAS GIRL! Be PROUD. I started in seventh grade too. It's so crazy how much of a stigma it is. I love that you guys talk so openly about it
ReplyDeleteNo embarrassment in our house either. Even the boys are comfortable talking about it. On the flip side, my oldest daughter was so upset that her period wasn't starting. She passed 12,13,14. Then all of a sudden she was super grateful because all of her friends were complaining about what a pain it was. She finally started at 17 but loved the years of freedom she had. She is now 28 with 3 kids!
ReplyDeleteMy daughter is in Kindergarten... So I have a couple years before having to have this talk. I hopefully will have her just as prepared as you had your lil lady
ReplyDeleteYour daughter sounds amazing!!! Mine is only a toddler but I've already contemplated how to handle it when she gets her period. I didn't know period parties were a thing but a uterus plush just might be a must! :)
ReplyDeleteI like the little reference to the Handmaid's tale. I remember that in my time, nobody quite talk about it. I mean there was like 30 minutes one day at school about it, but that was all. I'm so happy that you are so open about it, and that Natalie is as well. She's a woman now.
ReplyDeleteWhat a great way to prepare teens for this time in their lives. I'm going to have to tell my daughter about your post because it won't be long before her own daughter will be facing her period.
ReplyDeleteIf I ever have a daughter, I hope to be like this. My parents were all "hush, hush" about anything related to reproduction including periods. When I started, I didn't even tell anyone I was so embarrassed and ashamed. I'm more open about it now and it makes sense. It happens! There's nothing you can do about it. There's no reason to be ashamed. Thanks for this!
ReplyDeleteit is an important topic to educate & discuss with your kids.
ReplyDeleteMy 6th grader got it in September this year and I also told her it's just a normal thing and it's no big deal.
ReplyDeleteYeah, just like boys talk about circumcision, I guess there's nothing to be ashamed of talking about periods too.
ReplyDeleteThat is so awesome that you prepared her so well for it! Glad she is proud of her body and what it can do!
ReplyDeleteKileen
So great she is so open about her period. I was the last of my friends to start mine ... like well into high school ... so it was no biggie by then but I can see younger girls and boys not knowing how to handle it.
ReplyDeleteThis has been a taboo topic for far too long. I love that you are raising her to be confident in her body and with how it functions!
ReplyDeleteI love the fact that your daughter wanted a period party! I hope she enjoyed and I am so glad you're being so open with her on a topic that's otherwise taboo or embarrassing for so many people (and I don't know why!)
ReplyDeleteWow, don't we all remember the day we got our first period? I remember looooving Are You There God, It's Me Margaret!
ReplyDeleteI love the idea of having a party. Actually i have a daughter and she is 10 years old. I think i have to be prepared about having my daughter a period. And im really proud of that.
ReplyDeleteI love this idea! It's still a way to go for the 4-year-old but I want to do this for her. Go, Natalie!
ReplyDeleteThis is awesome. I'm a dude, so I obviously don't get visits from Aunt Flo, but I've always been stupified by how squeemish people can be about this. It's just a thing that happens.
ReplyDeleteWhat a great way to celebrate becoming a woman. I love it! Keep talking and celebrating womanhood.
ReplyDeleteoh wow!!! I've never heard of period party before, i loooove the idea, great way to celebrate womanhood.
ReplyDeleteThat is something new! I never heard of that before but sounds like a great way to celebrate!
ReplyDeleteThis seems so different to me, but not like in a bad way! Just never really thought about it before. So glad that Natalie isn't ashamed, as it should be, and that boy that turned red? Made me giggle thinking of how confident Natalie seems to just be like 'whatever' it's life sort of mentality. That plush is kinda cool, too!
ReplyDeleteThis is absolutely awesome! I think you raised her right. Periods are always shushed away, and need not be. Great work!
ReplyDeleteI loved the way you told her to be confident or to not be discreet or too ashamed of having period. So cool. ��
ReplyDeleteI totally enjoy reading this article and honestly, I like the way you and your daughter spreading awareness about having a period. I agree that this is the thing that we should not ashamed, we should be proud of it instead.
ReplyDeleteYour daughter is amazing! I hope I can raise my little gals to never be ashamed of their bodies. Keep it up!!
ReplyDeleteI love the way you have dealt with the subject of having a period with your daughter. I wish I could share your post with people in India whos till think period is a dirty thing and treat girls and women who are in their periods like a dirty person!
ReplyDeleteI remember starting my period very young. I was only 7 or 8 years old and had no idea about Aunt Flo at the time. It was very scary and was always very taboo in my house. So I'm very glad to hear that you're teaching your daughter that it's nothing to be ashamed of because it isn't.
ReplyDelete(Also I really want a uterus plush so please point me in it's general direction)
This is such a fun way to deal with this topic. I have two daughters so I will be using these ideas!
ReplyDeleteIt's cool to have a party for this! And you are right: we don't need to be ashame!
ReplyDeletePeriods exist and are nothing to be ashamed of. It is only smart to teach out girls not to be ashamed of periods and having them.
ReplyDeleteGreat info! I have two young daughters, will remember when they reach this age!
ReplyDeleteWhat an awesome idea! I think it is great that females are celebrating their periold.
ReplyDeletei actually want to do this when my daughter gets her period, like no joke i love this.
ReplyDeleteFunny how as teens we want this but then as we get older we dread it. The monthly thing is not my favorite.
ReplyDeleteThat was a really amazing idea! Thanks for sharing this info. I have a daughter who recently experience monthly period.
ReplyDeleteI can relate to having late period. I was frustrated too why I was late but my Mom comforted me
ReplyDeleteIt's cool t have a party like this. I never thought about it
ReplyDeleteIt's so important to prepare your child for such a big day to keep it from being a traumatic experience. I'm glad she could embrace the occasion.
ReplyDeleteGirl. I'm loving this so much! I love that the boy asked if it was a brain. The answer is yes. My uterus is smarter than your head any day of the week.
ReplyDeleteEducation is key, prepare our girls early and the changes in their bodies will not be a surprise or something to be ashamed of ,thanks for sharing!
ReplyDeleteHaha, I was like Natalie :) There is nothing to be ashamed of our menstrual cycle! Period party sounds cool �� :D
ReplyDeleteEverything Enchanting ❤️
Period is still considered as a taboo in our country. We wish to get over it one day
ReplyDeleteWhat a wonderful idea, it's so much better to be prepared for sure! Great post
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