Saturday, August 19, 2006

Click Click Click

Nothing new this weekend.

My stomach decided to let me eat. That was a plus. And for some reason I've become obsessed with gummy bears.

Big news happened for Tom.

He got a new paintball gun.

And I want to chuck it out the window.

He went paintballing with some guys from work on Saturday. He brought his old spider gun with him. One of the first that ever came out, apparently. The guys, he said they laughed at it, laughed at how it took forever to shoot, how crummy it looked..

But then.

One of the guys who worked there was intrigued by this old gun. Intrigued that it was an old Spider. (I still have no idea what that means. Tom kept saying "Spider this" and "Spider that" and I kept picturing a real spider.) So he offered Tom a brand new paintball gun that was originally 70 pounds. (140 American.) Said he'd sell it to Tom if he'd give him the old Spider and pay 20 pounds.

Here I picture Tom salivating over the new gun. His tongue hanging out, eyes wide, fingers itching to touch the newness of it all.

He agreed.

Handed over his old Spider without so much as a second glance and eagerly took hold of his new baby.

Even though it's a dark pink color.

He said the guys laughed at that too. Made fun of the fact that he was going to nail them with a pink gun.

"Is that for your wife?" a few of them joked before they went out to the field.

Tom said he just took all their taunts with a knowing smile on their face. And with his pink gun he took nearly everyone out.

"Hah, they made fun of me but I showed them..." Tom told me when he got home.

He showed me his new prize when he walked through the door. Shoved it underneath my nose.


I immediately thought of money. Asked how much he blew on it. Did the scary wife stance, arms crossed tightly across my chest, grim expression.

Tom told me the story on how he gave away his old Spider and only paid 20 pounds.

He even started stroking it at one point. Touching the trigger so it made an annoying click click click sound over and over. Then he started to clean the thing. He took it apart, wiped it lovingly with paper towels.

"I play?" Tommy asked, eyes wide at his Daddy's new toy.

Tom practically brought the gun quickly to his chest, protecting it.

"No. This is Daddy's. You are not to touch. If Daddy sees you touching this you're in trouble. Okay?" he said sternly.

Tommy backed away slowly.

"Can I see?" I asked sweetly.

Tom hesitated. "I just cleaned it and...oh fine. But be careful." He handed over gently, as though it were a baby.

I was surprised by how heavy it was. It didn't look heavy as Tom cleaned it.

"It's nice.." I finally said, handing it back.

Tom's eyes glazed over. "Nice doesn't even begin to cover it. You should see her in action."

I rolled my eyes. "No thanks."

He held that thing in his lap for over and hour. He'd touch the trigger every so often and that click click click sound would fill the room. It got to the point where that clicking sound drove me up the wall. I told him to put it away, back in the box.

"But.." Tom spluttered.

"But what? You can't hold it all night."

Tom's expression showed me that a part of him was intending to do just that.

He eventually put it back in the box. Gently. He unscrewed pieces and put them in their proper place.

When I came downstairs the next morning Tom was already awake. As I decended the stairs I could hear it.

Click click click.

Oh for...

Sure enough, Tom was on the couch, gun in his lap.

"Tommmm," I grumbled.

He gave me a bewildered look. As though he couldn't understand that I didn't comprehend how perfect the gun was.

The clicking, that's what's going to get to me. I had to hear it all throughout the day yesterday. I almost started hearing it in my sleep.

Click click click



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