Okay, I need to stop watching The Today Show.
Today they talked about the germs in your house. And how they're actually SPREAD with a vacuum.
Oh ew.
The lady who was explaining this was all, "Yes, we found germs that can cause diarreah, pnemonia, strep..."
However, they did say that if you had a vacuum with a Hepa filter that it helps somewhat.
But Tom had the runs the other day and now I'm wondering if it's because of our floor? (Or my cooking. Eeps!)
Thank goodness our Dyson has a Hepa filter. I feel a little better about that.
But I'm still very very disgusted.
Anyhow, the other day Tom asked what I wanted for our anniversary.
"Nothing," I said with a shrug.
Because honestly, I spent a lot of money on the Wii. (Some people asked how much I paid. I paid $249, as is the usual price. But I added on accessories and such which brought the total to $320. Eeps.) I put it on my Amazon Rewards credit card because hey, I figured I could get points out of it at least. But I hate using credit cards. (We usually always use debit cards.)
"You need to give me a list," Tom chastised.
So I scribbled one up.
It went something like this:
--A Gymboree Gift Card
--An Amazon Gift Card
--Some treats that are down the Wal-Mart aisle--I saw chocolate dipped pretzels, chocolate dipped marshmallows and a giant Reeses Peanut Butter Cup. Yum!
--A cheeseball from Hickory Farms
---------
And, you know, that was basically it.
Tom was not amused. He looked at it and raised an eyebrow.
"A CHEESEball? For our anniversary? No way. Not only is it cheesy--" he paused when I started to giggle at that and shot me a Look. "But cheese gives you gas."
True that.
"I guess I should be happy that you didn't ask for a person," Tom continued.
Usually I put a human being on my list.
Usually it's Elijah Wood.
"And Gymboree? Amber. That's not for you," Tom said.
"But I have fun buying clothes," I explained.
"How about some jewelry?" Tom asked.
I shrugged. "I have a lot of jewelry. I can't really wear any because Natalie tries to pull it from my neck."
Tom stared at my ring finger. "I can get you a new wedding ring. The one I gave you before is cheap."
I held my ring finger to my heart. "I like my cheap ring," I retorted.
And it wasn't totally cheap. I think it was near $500. That's not cheap to me. I guess it is to some people who have thousands of dollars sitting on their ring finger. But I don't think I'd feel comfortable with that. I'm a total klutz and I could se myself losing a ring like that.
"You have to give me better ideas than this," Tom said, setting my list down.
"Flowers?" I offered.
Tom sighed. "That's it?"
"It's all I can think of," I replied.
I started to walk away and Tom cleared his throat. I turned around.
"Aren't you going to ask what I want for our anniversary?" he questioned.
Oh.
Oops.
I didn't ask because I already bought his gift. A Wii. Which was shipped yesterday.
"What do you want?" I pretended like I really cared even though I knew that the Best Gift EVER was on its way.
"There are some computer games that I want," Tom said. And then he prattled on about some gun and about some powerful flashlight that can attach to the gun and he was blah blah blahing and I kept thinking about the Wii and how excited he'd be.
Tom clapped his hand which made me jump out of my skin. "Hello? Are you listening?" He waved a hand in front of my face.
I nodded. "Yes. A flashlight. That attaches to your gun. And a Wii," I said, trying to supress my knowing smile.
Tom looked confused. "I never said anything about a Wii. I've given up on a Wii."
I had to look away so he wouldn't see my stupid grin on my face. I seriously cannot lie. My danged face gives it away. I usually smile like a complete idiot when I'm lying.
It's a horrible compulsion I have. Even when something horrible happens I feel compelled to smile.
Oh, I have Rachael Ray on and she has this van called RachRescue that I guess helps people cook?
I need that.
Rachael, help me!
I may have given my husband the runs.
I really don't know what I'm doing in the kitchen.
Help!
Thursday, November 13, 2008
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You are stinkin' hilarious. I knew I would love this blog. (tansy2 on GF)
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