Monday, May 20, 2013

My Six Year Old Spelled The Word Clock Wrong...

It’s been a penis couple of days in my house.

No, that’s not a typo.

Remember how I wrote about Tommy watching the puberty video at school?

Well, on the same day, Natalie had a spelling test.

She spelled the word clock wrong.

I burst out laughing.

“What’s so funny?” Natalie asked.

I swallowed. I couldn’t tell her. “It’s…um….it’s just a beautiful day!” I fibbed. "And that makes me happy!"

Natalie laughed along, none the wiser. “Yeah, that makes me happy too!”

“That’s a bad word. It means penis,” Tommy cut in, staring at the paper.

Oh for—

“Tommy, what do you mean, it’s a feathered bird,” I said, shooting him a Look.

He didn’t catch it. “No, it’s another word for penis. A boy in my class said it and had to sit out in the hall.”

“It means PENIS?” Natalie shrieked. She tossed her head back and cracked up. “Cock, cock, cock!”

“Stop it!” I hissed, shutting the front door. I hoped no one was walking past. Our screen was open. People jog by often. I didn’t want to be known as the penis house.

“Cock, cock, cock!” Natalie continued.

“Cock-a-doodle-do said the rooster,” I insisted. “That’s right, sweetheart!”

“Cock means penis,” Natalie snickered.

We were set to leave for the school carnival. I did not want her sharing this information to her friends. Can you IMAGINE the looks the parents would give me? What are you allowing your children to watch? Well, Family Guy, sometimes, if I'm being completely honest. But they've never repeated a naughty word from the show. I swear!

“Cock means penis,” I pictured Natalie whispering to her friends. And then the word would spread and the principal would have to come over the loudspeaker and go, “Could everyone refrain from using a particular word that rhymes with dock? It is not appropriate in a school setting. Or anywhere.”

Anyway, I’m keeping the spelling test in Natalie’s school book that I have yet to fill out. (I should start on that before I start forgetting teacher names and such…)

Because kid typos are hilarious.


  1. I have a great picture of my son writing "My hen is sick." Only it came out "My penis sick." I'm saving that one for prosperity, for sure!!

  2. haha! And the teacher who corrected you think he/she laughed? I know I would have! We have roofers over today and my little baby crawled out into the kitchen and my daughter yelled, "Look, it's f**ker!" I have no idea where that came from but I do know we had people over and they heard it!

  3. That is awesome. From the mouth of babes. Glad to hear someone elses house is just as hilarious as mine when it comes to stuff like this. Gotta laugh because it is funny!

  4. Oh gosh that is too funny! I love when kids misspell words :D

  5. So damn awesome. We would have laughed, too, for sure!!-The Dose Girls

  6. Lol. Omg....this is so hilarious! Thanks for the Monday laugh!

  7. Maybe she actually spelled "lock".


  8. When one of our kids comes out with a "that means penis"-type comment, we just agree and then think of all the other things it also means. So far, they usually get bored and move on to something else.

  9. Oh my gosh! So funny! I would have loved to have been that teacher!

  10. I love that the teacher wrote the correct word so you'd know she wasn't tying Sex Ed in with Spelling.
    One little letter makes a big difference (no pun intended). Heh.

  11. Oh Natalie-- you keep your momma on her toes, don't you! She reminds me of when my kids were little. Hm. Maybe I have to blog about little Rachel, age 5, coming in to tell me about the neighbor boy's penis... Thanks for the prompt!

  12. Just hoping you all made it through the terrible storms today! I'm fairly certain you aren't too close the areas hit really hard, but as a newby to Tornado Alley, I'm sure it has been a pretty scary day for you and your family.

    And as a sidebar, on a little Mother's Day "About my Mom" questionnaire, a boy in my son's pre-k class responded "What does my mommy likes to: (fill in the blank)" and the boy's response was "watch Adult Movies".....that got an awesome laugh!!!

    :) Jane

  13. Oh goodness. Kids. I live for these moments ;)

  14. Yep. We had something like that after a visit to the Chinese restaurant that had the animal years listed. Rooster was listed as Cock instead. Many conversations about who should stay away from the cock and who would be best suited for a cock and cock cock cock this and that... Oy vey.

  15. Why is this hilarious?! I don't know, but it is!

    I would have died laughing too, and then your son comes in and makes it worse. (Isn't that always what guys do?)

    Nice save by the way. Let us know how the carnival went, and whether she is now banned from school activities because of using slang words for a male's junk. :-)

  16. Brilliant! And I'm sure her teacher had a good laugh too!

  17. OMG!!! I am dying here oldest two would have taken that and just blabbed it everywhere - yes, I am THAT mom with THOSE kids

  18. LMAO....I needed that chuckle today.

  19. HA Ha that is funny - I wonder what the teacher thought correcting that? lol

  20. That is so funny! Never a dull moment when you have kids.

    I'm not sure why but years ago when the kids were little I taught them the proper terms vagina & penis ... well they went around telling everyone they met; did you know girls have a vagina and boys have a penis?


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