Friday, January 2, 2015

I Resolve To NOT....

I usually do resolutions that I vow to NOT do for the new year. So here are mine for 2015!






I resolve to NOT....stop hating the word selfie. And bae. Awful words.


I resolve to NOT....stop eating my delicious McDonalds. The fries make me happy.


I resolve to NOT....stop being annoyed that our troops are paid so little.


I resolve to NOT....vow to lose any weight. It might happen. It might not. I like my sweets.


I resolve to NOT....stop watching crap reality TV. It entertains me. Celebrity Apprentice starts on January 4th. I'm rooting for Brandi. Or Gilbert Gotfried.


I resolve to NOT....stop trying to get my book published. There has got to be an agent out there for me. (I do have a book I self-published called The Swimmer's Assistant.)


I resolve to NOT....stop laughing when someone farts. It's funny.


I resolve to NOT....start doing Yoga. It's not for me. I wrote a blog post on why I would never do it. If someone farted when bending over, I'd DIE with laughter.



What do YOU resolve not to do?


23 comments:

  1. I love that you make not resolutions. I could make many like that!

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  2. I love these. They put a new spin on traditional resolutions / goals!

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  3. Well I love yoga, haven't gone to McDonalds in at least 12 years, really don't care about slang words, don't watch TV, eat pretty clean...I think you see where I'm going here ;). But there is one I stand up and applaud you on and couldn't agree more...I look forward to the day we care more about the men who protect this country than the men who protect a football. Oh and yes - good luck finding your publisher! Yes, she/he will come. I often see publishers looking for new authors on Twitter!

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  4. Ohh I love this! I should have done this instead of my 'Goals' haha.
    I too, hate the word Bae. WHY?! Just WHY?!

    HAPPY NEW YEAR!

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  5. mmmmm McDonald's fries are the best! Fun take on the whole resolutions post :)

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  6. It's like you read my mind! lol I'm coming around to selfie, but BAE makes me crazy! Plus ... reality TV and McD's fries are like my ideal Friday night!

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  7. Love this post!! Selfie doesn't bother me as much as "bae" does... I actually saw a post on Facebook where someone said that "bae" means poop in I forget what language and that literally made me laugh out loud.

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  8. love it. I am gonna make some Not resolutions. Although yoga has helped me a lot - but I certainly never, ever in a million years pictured myself as a yoga person. Not at all. my old body needs the flexibility help though now.
    but the day a fart is not funny - you might as well just lay down and die, because really? what else is there then?

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  9. I still need to come up with some "resolutions," but I def like your spin on things "NOT" to do!!

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  10. I resolve to NOT set any resolutions. I may have a goal or two to work on, but they really have nothing to do with the new year of 2015. 2015 isn't going to help the goals be met.

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  11. What a great perspective on new year's resolutions. I have a list of things I don't want to do either, like eating McD fries. So cool you self published!

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  12. I love this and agree with so many of them! Especially the farts. I can't help it. It will always, ALWAYS be funny! You also know that I love my trashy reality TV!

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  13. Haha. This is awesome. I resolve to NOT stop watching chessy romantic Hallmark style movies. I love those things!

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  14. I'm with you - I don't do resolutions!!
    And, I CAN'T wait for Celebrity Apprentice - it has been far too long!!!

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  15. These are awesome! I ate my fair share of McD's french fries on our roadtrip! And I can't wait for the new season of The Bachelor!

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  16. I agree with the first one! I don't mind 'selfie' that much, but 'bae' is just horrible.

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  17. Do you think people fart at yoga? I don't think I could handle that. I would definitely run out of the room laughing.
    And I still haven't figured out bae, for good reason!

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  18. What does the word "bae" even mean? Have we already had this conversation?

    I resolve to NOT ever stop watching The Bachelor regardless of how douche he gets or how stupid the girls are.

    I resolve to NOT feel bad for not wearing makeup in public.

    I resolve to NOT create huge adorable gift baskets for teachers and bus drivers and teacher assistants and lunch ladies. You get a handmade card from my kid. Deal with it.

    Awesome post, as usual!

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  19. Good for you! Keep doing what you enjoy. I resolve to not stop dreaming of traveling again. Also, to not stop eating Talenti gelato because it is the best thing ever.

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  20. I will only do yoga poses in private.

    Farts are always funny.

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  21. HAH! I loved your yoga post. And this is refreshing, I like your resolve not to's. I'm catching up on a bunch of posts in my bloglovin' feed and this is the perfect fix I needed for all the 2014 posts I'm reading. lol

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Thanks for the comment!

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