Sunday, April 10, 2022

Different Reactions When My Husband Told Me He's Deploying Again

My husband hadn't even been home that long from being in Turkey for a year. So when he told me he was deploying, I didn't know what to think. I had all sorts of reactions running through my head, some of which contained filthy words which I'll keep out of this post as I realize not everyone finds it appropriate to let the f word fly. 


Here's my reactions:


1. I laughed. I thought he was joking. I was all, "very funny." I might have even playfully punched his shoulder. 


He was like, "I'm not kidding. I'm going." It took a few times of him saying this for it to sink in.



2. I need a therapist. Seriously, it's not easy to deal with everything on your own. Sometimes when you're married to a person who is seems to leave more times than he stays, you feel incredibly alone. The military does provide therapy, or you can google online therapy that takes insurance and multiple choices pop up. Know that you are NOT alone. There are usually deployment groups as well.




3. How am I going to do this again? For the most part I don't mind being alone. In fact, I love it because it means I can do what I want, when I want. I get the remote to myself and don't have to explain why I'm watching Real Housewives of Beverly Hills in the middle of the day. But it can be tough when I have to be in two places at once and I don't have the help. Oh gosh, I have to do yard work again. Ugh. What if something breaks? I can fix some things but other times I'm at a loss. There is Angi which is a site to find someone who can help if something does fall apart at least. When Tom was gone the last time our ceiling started leaking so I had to get roofers. 


4. Is he going to be safe? Yes, most places he goes is safe, but they are all located in unsafe areas. Plus he can go on missions and those aren't always safe, so I always worry. I find meditation can help if I get too worked up. Plus there's also the aforementioned therapy. And McDonald's French Fries.




5. I can do it. I know I am capable of handling everything. When all else fails, there's shopping at Target and lots of chocolate. Sometimes I just need to take a deep breath and remind myself that I've got this.


Saying goodbye is the worst. It never gets easier. But I feel like I grow a little each time he goes. With the help of family and friends, I know I'll be okay after I send my husband off. For hopefully the very last time. One can always hope. 









16 comments:

  1. So sorry to hear this. I have 2 sons in the military. One just left for a 1 1/2 assignment.

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  2. I was a military wife for a short period of time. It was rough when my ex-husband deployed. I was at home alone for a year with two young kids. It was amazing what I was able to accomplish. However, the marriage ended shortly after the end of the deployment because I found out he cheated. It sucks that people cheat. :(

    I wish you and your husband the best. Technology is on your side now and it makes communicating with each other easier. Back in 2001, it wasn't so easy and internet in foreign countries was very expensive to use.

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  3. I'm so happy that you have the support of friends and family.

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  4. I'm so sorry to hear this! That must be so hard but it seems like you're so strong for it!

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  5. Glad to read you have support around you during deployment. Not easy for sure but you find strength within. Cheers

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  6. I am so sorry! Sending you some prayers to get through this round and hoping for his safe return soon.

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  7. I can't imagine how hard this must be. I'm so sorry. Deployment is never easy on anyone.

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  8. I can't imagine all of the feelings you must be feeling. I hope that he stays safe and returns home soon!

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  9. Gosh, that must be so hard! I have been staying away from my husband because of my parents' treatment for the past three months and let me tell you, it's not easy for me at all :( I could never be a Military wife for sure!

    Everything Enchanting <3

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  10. This is really hard, so sorry to hear about the deployment. He'll be back home soon for sure!

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  11. As I read your post, I receive a sense of how you were feeling I understand what you are going through when your husband has to deploy. have faith he will be home soon.

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  12. I only can immagine how hard it can be. The most important part is that he stays safe!

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  13. God love you all, I know this is such a hard road and thank you all for your service.

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  14. If it was my husband, the hardest part would be always thinking about how he is and if he's safe. Hope your husband stays safe. -LYNNDEE

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  15. It must be so tough to get this news. I can understand that you could have a range of reactions like this.

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Thanks for the comment!

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