In Which I Got A Case of Verbal Diarrhea

"I am too old for this! Too old! This whole thing? Embarrassing!" Tommy grumbled as we walked into the Youth Center.

"It's fine," I insisted. I gave our names to the uniformed soldier sitting behind a table.

"I'm too old!" Tommy repeated for like the twentieth time. He repeats himself a lot. I didn't realize it was an autism thing. Sometimes he'll ask a question and I'll answer him and then an hour later he'll ask me the SAME question.

"You deserve a medal too," I explained.

We were at the Home Front Hero dinner that the Airman and Family Readiness Center on the military base put together for deployed families. The kids were all getting a certificate and medal for being brave while their parents were away. I found this to be an awesome thing--and even better, they were feeding us so it meant I didn't have to cook.

There were some booths set up that we checked out. Some had free books. Candy. Pens. I could always use pens. Mine always disappear. At one booth a woman handed over some bags and said, "Here's something for your children." To which Tommy immediately said, "I'm not a child! I'm 11! I'm too old for this!"

I made him apologize. He said, "I'm sorry. But I'm not a child. I'm growing up."

He made my head hurt.

He seems to think that because he's in middle school that he's no longer a kid. He explains that his voice is getting lower and that he's going through puberty. He doesn't like toys anymore--except for Legos. He's turning into a man. He tells me this multiple times a day. I inform him that he's still technically a kid until he's 18. He disagrees.

This is basically how Tommy looked during the first hour:

"Tommy!" I hissed. "You're scaring people. Stop it."

"I am too old for this!" Tommy whispered back.

He wasn't the oldest one there. An eighth grader showed up.

"Maybe Tommy needs a time out," Natalie said primly. "I'm happy." She twirled and went, "Ta-da!"

"You are the worst sister," Tommy grumbled. "I'm too OLD for this."

I looked around hoping to find some alcohol. There wasn't any. So I reached for the package of M&Ms that were passed out. I ripped it open and poured a huge amount into my mouth.

"Hey!" Natalie shouted indignantly. "That was MINE!"

I chewed. I probably had a chocolate bubble at the corner of my mouth. A Colonel walked past at that moment and did a double take. There were a lot of commanders at the dinner. I was not making the best impression. I quickly swallowed and wiped my lips.

Some important people talked. Thanked the families. Then announced that it was time to eat.

There was music playing--Disney music--so Natalie started to dance:

Her outfit looked like this by the way:

Her shirt says, "Daddy is my hero and I am his princess." I did not make this. I cannot sew. I buy my products from Etsy. You can purchase the set here.

As we were eating, a different Colonel sat down at the table. That's what the higher ups were there to do: converse with the families, make sure we haven't lost our minds, stuff like that. I had just taken a gigantic bite of roll when he sat down and introduced himself so I sat there chewing like an idiot. Then I reached out to shake his hand and I totally jabbed him with my jagged nail. He was polite about it as I apologized profusely.


And then I got a case of verbal diarrhea. When I'm nervous I start talking and then I can't stop. It's why I worry about going to a blogger convention. I'll make a fool of myself and be known as The Girl Who Won't Shut Up. I told the Colonel about missing Tom. About eating tons of chocolate. ("I've probably gained like 10 pounds, ha! Most wives are out losing weight when their husbands go and I'm stuffing my face!") About how my kids can drive me insane. ("My daughter doesn't like to listen to me but she listens at school.") The guy sat there nodding kindly. After talking his ear off I thought, "It's okay though, I'll probably never see him again. He's a COLONEL." But then he was like, "Oh, I sometimes sit in during dog certifications."

My husband works in K9 and will most likely be getting a dog when he comes back. And will need to get certified. So he will meet the Colonel who will remember his last name and say something like, "That wife of yours is a chatterbox and she clawed up my hand!"


The only reason I stopped talking was because the ceremony began. I'm sure the guy was relieved. The kids were all called up to get their certificate and medal:

Tommy seemed much happier after getting his medal.

I thought it was a fabulous thing for the base to do. I only frightened one person, so that's a plus.


"That was okay," Tommy said as we walked to our car. "But I'm not a kid anymore. Just so you know."

I sighed. "Yes. I know."

Gluten-Free Bread: More Than 100 Artisan Loaves for a Healthier Life by Ellen Brown Review

My mother-in-law is gluten-free.

She discovered she had celiac disease about a year ago. This means she had to give up a lot of foods that she loved.

I know she'd enjoy the book Gluten-Free Bread: More Than 100 Artisan Loaves For A Healthier Life by Ellen Brown. Why? Well, because she loves bread. When we'd go to Texas Roadhouse she'd enjoy the rolls that were served. She'd reach for the breadsticks at Olive Garden. I imagine it's extremely difficult not to be able to have those.

However, the book has many delicious recipes that she can make that are gluten-free! Also, I loved the colorful pictures that accompanied most recipes.

I liked how the book explained what things were and how they worked. For instance, it went into detail about yeast. I'm interested because I'm not exactly sure what goes into making bread. I tend to buy mine already made.

I LOVE baguettes so I was pleased to find a recipe for it:

I also am a gigantic fan of bagels.

There were so many scrumptious recipes that made me drool. I love bread. And yes, I do plan on making some of this bread when my mother-in-law comes to visit.


The author, Ellen Brown, is the author of 35 cookbooks so I know she knows her stuff! If you want a copy of the book, you can purchase it from Amazon.com here.


So if you have someone who is gluten-free in your life, or YOU are gluten-free, be sure to check out Gluten-Free Bread. Don't deny yourself the pleasure of biting into a warm loaf.


**I received a copy of the book to review in exchange for my honest opinion*

The Little Mermaid DVD Winner!

I did a giveaway for a Blu-Ray + DVD set of The Little Mermaid here.


I used random.org to pick a winner and it chose..


....number 17 which is Tj and Amy.



Congrats!



If you didn't win, try again in another giveaway. I currently have one for a Grace Unplugged prize pack here and I will have other giveaways in the future.

Grace Unplugged Prize Pack Giveaway!**CLOSED

**CLOSED! Winner posted here**



I love when I can find a wonderful family movie.

Grace Unplugged is one of those.



Here is what it is about:

Sometimes, chasing your dreams leads you right to where you belong!

Having just turned 18, Grace Trey aspires to more than just singing at her church where her father, a former pop star, is the worship leader. So, with the help of Mossy, her dad's former manager, Grace records a cover version of her dad's old Top-10 hit, runs off to Los Angeles, and begins to taste the kind of stardom she's always dreamed about.

Yet with each rung of the ladder she climbs, Grace feels more and more pressure to compromise her values, further straining her relationship with her parents. Will everything she experiences lead her to reject her faith… or rediscover it?

Grace Unplugged opens in theaters October 4 and is “Family Approved” by the Dove Foundation.

The Grace Unplugged Cast:
AJ Michalka
James Denton
Kevin Pollak
Michael Welch



Check out the app to learn more. You can find out if you're ready for the rockstar life and watch a fabulous music video by the actress who plays Grace in the movie:






A lucky reader can when the Grace Unplugged Prize Pack!




It includes the following:

• Grace Unplugged Soundtrack CD
- Songs by TobyMac, AJ Michalka, Chris Tomlin and Shawn McDonald.
• Grace Unplugged: A Novel by Melody Carlson.
• Own It: The book Discover Your Faith in God by Michael & Hayley DiMarco.
• Grace Unplugged Exclusive Guitar Pick.



Giveaway Rules:

--Must be 18 or older

--Must live in the US or Canada

--NO PO Boxes



Mandatory Entry: Take the Are You Ready For The Rockstar quiz and tell me your results!



Extra Entries:

--Tweet about the giveaway using #GraceUnplugged

--Tell me if you've ever chased a dream before!



I will run the contest until October 5th.



Good luck!!



**I was not compensated for this post. My opinions are my own**

Magazine Subscription From Zinio Winners!

I did a giveaway for a magazine subscription to Zinio here. 9 lucky winners were picked!

The winners are..



Number 1, which is Kim


Number 3, which is sara hamltion


Number 4, which is Crystal


Number 7, which is quickbite


Number 9, which is Edward Chan


Number 12, which is Shawna Kryshel


Number 14, which is Meg Davis


Number 16, which is Madeline B


Number 20, which is Chee Yong Hsia



Congrats!!


If you didn't win, I currently have a giveaway for The Little Mermaid DVD here so you can try again. I will also have future giveaways!

Disney On Ice: Rockin' Ever After

Behold! A goat doing a Miley Cyrus impression.

Obviously I'm kidding. It was just eating goat food.


Last week we went to the Oklahoma State Fair to take Natalie to Disney On Ice: Rockin' Ever After. Tommy stayed home. Princesses are really not his thing. We got to the fair early so we could look around.


We found a petting zoo and Natalie adored all the animals. I did not like the way this goat was looking at me:

I kept my eye on him.


Then Natalie spotted pony rides and had to go on one. The guy who works there looks thrilled:

"How much longer do I have to stand here in this hat?"


Natalie loved her pony. She's confident on horses/ponies/cats...

It was time for my favorite part after her ride: fair food!


I got the cheesy bacon bombs:

They were an explosion of YUM in my mouth. They were deep fried cheese curds surrounded by bacon. Cue my Homer Simpson impression: "Mmmmm.....bacon..."


It was time for Disney On Ice after we ate. Now, if you go to Disney On Ice I recommend bringing a light up toy already--because the ones they sell are $20. Natalie brought the one that I bought last year even though she wanted others. "But MERIDA has a light up stick!" she told me. "Then go ask MERIDA to buy it for you," I responded.

We had seats in the very front thanks to my Mom who treated us to the show:

Now, warning, my Disney On Ice pictures suck. I do not know how to take good pictures in the dark. I tried different settings and they didn't come out. So excuse the blurriness. I do not know what I'm doing when I take pictures. I have a Nikon D40 that lives on Auto.


Mickey and Minnie came out first.

Natalie told me seriously, "They look the same as they did when we saw them at Disney in June!"


Goofy and Donald came out:

Sebastion came out and did a number:

Ariel signed her voice away:

Ariel got legs and did this. I sort of want to send this picture to my husband and go, "Sorry I'm not this flexible."

Eric came out and tossed her around:

You'd better HOPE that the Eric actor is not having a bad day...


Rapunzel came out next. Natalie booed at Mother Gothel:

"She's just so RUDE!" Natalie said.


Rapunzel knocked out Flynn. I sort of want to do this to One Direction when I hear them sing:

Maximus came out. I wonder how the person being the butt feels?

Merida came out next. I did not get many good pictures of her.

Then Gaston came out. He and Kanye West would be great friends.

Everyone rejoiced. Not because of Gaston. This was the Be Our Guest number. I wish my cutlery would dance for me.

Gaston killed the Beast:

The Beast turned into a PERSON!

"Behold! It is I!"


Everyone came out for the last number:

Natalie wanted Belle's gold dress. I wanted Tom to dress up like the Prince. He said no way. Never. Not even if Natalie asked.

It was a fantastic show. If they come next year, we'll probably go again! Tickets are as cheap as $15 so if Disney On Ice comes to your area, I highly recommend it!

Things That Annoy Me Thursday: Worldwide Day Of Play

So last Saturday I was having Issues.

My computer was acting up again. I had thought I had fixed it from the wonderful suggestions of my readers but no, it was like, "Ha! Fooled ya!"

Then Tommy was like, "My laptop is being weird." (And when I say laptop, I'm not saying brand new laptop. Some parents on the forum I write at will say things like, "My ten year old wants a new laptop. I'm getting him the Macbook Pro!" and I want to say, "Are you related to a Trump? Why would a TEN YEAR OLD need a Macbook Pro?!" No, Tommy's laptop is my mom's old laptop. She coincidentally upgraded to a Mac.)

Anyway, so let's take stock here.

I had my computer being an ass.

I had Tommy's laptop being an ass.

Things were breaking all around me. I needed time to fix them. But I couldn't, because each time I sat down to try and figure out the issues Natalie was like, "Will you play tea party with me?" We'd sip out of plastic cups and I'd say, "I need to go fix some stuff.." and she'd stick a My Little Pony in my hand and go, "Be Shining Armor. He's upset because he can't find his sister Twilight Sparkle."

I managed to break away after that game. I said, "Let's see what Peppa Pig is up to!" because she normally comes on at 1. I switched it over to Nick Jr and...

"What the hell?" I hissed.

Natalie's mouth formed an O. "That's a naughty word. If you said that in school, you'd have to move down your clip."

I mean, okay, I get what Nickelodeon was trying to do. There's a childhood obesity epidemic going around. I noticed this first hand at the State Fair. I spotted it while flipping the channels and noticed that Honey Boo Boo chick playing with her stomach fat. Michelle Obama won't shut up about it. So yes, kids need more exercise.

But.

UGH!

NOT ON DAYS WHEN I NEED TO FIX STUFF.

Not when my husband is DEPLOYED!

I complained about this online and some people were like, "I agree! I can't even send my kid outside because it's raining!"

Then what, Nick Jr? What if it was RAINING?

They'd probably say, "Play an educational Wii game where you get up and move and LEARN!"

Kiss my ASS, Nick Jr.

"Why won't this screen go away? What's it doing to Peppa Pig?" Natalie asked, concerned.

Is it wrong I immediately thought of bacon?

Ahem.

Anyway, you know what came to our rescue?

Netflix.

And don't worry, Natalie DID get outside later that day. It's just, when she goes out I need to have my focus on her because she's adventurous and she'd be the kid who would climb a tree and get stuck.

My computer is still being a butt.

The laptop is fixed.

Not by me. I took it into the Geek Squad. I'll write about that another time.

Let's hope Nick Jr doesn't pull that stunt this weekend. Natalie needs to make sure Peppa Pig is okay and has not wound up on someone's breakfast plate.

Hey, It's Okay Tuesday!

I got this idea from Glamour magazine. They have a section called Hey, It’s Okay and will list a bunch of things to be okay about. You're welcome to join in and do something like this on your blog. Doesn't have to be on a Tuesday either. Just make sure you link up and that the post you link up is a Hey, It's Okay Post.

-------------------

To have not bought the new iPhone 5. I have an iPhone 5 that works fine. The people standing in line and going crazy baffled me. It's a PHONE.


To want a Macbook Pro for Christmas. Since we're having computer issues, I figured that can be my only Christmas gift. I just will need to learn how to use it since I'm used to Windows.


To have finished watching Scandal season 2. The ending made me go, "What now?" It's an awesome show. Quinn is turning creepy.


To not have a fall wardrobe. What's that? I basically wear jeans and a t-shirt all year long.


To like the new show Sleepy Hollow. It's pretty interesting.


To hope the government comes up with a plan so it doesn't get shut down. If it's shut down, it means the military won't get paid on time. You do not want the people defending our country disgruntled.


To find it amusing when people whine about the lack of healthy food at a fair. People. It's a FAIR. Stop complaining. If you want to eat your kale chips and salads, do it at home. A fair means junk food and fried everything.


To have already bought several bags of Halloween candy....to eat NOW.


To be decorating for Halloween this weekend. I'll leave the outdoor stuff to my husband, provided the Air Force will let him come home before Halloween.


To have two giveaways going on right now: win The Little Mermaid DVD here and win a magazine subscription here.

I'm Ready For My Deployed Husband To Come Home. Everything Is Breaking.

It never fails.

My husband deploys and everything around me breaks.

My vacuum? Stops sucking.

My computer? Stops computing.

My kids? Stop listening.

I'm at the point where I want to run outside and scream, "STOP BREAKING!" But I can't because it would frighten the neighborhood and someone would call Security Forces.

To date, the following items have acted up on me:

--My Dyson vacuum. Apparently there was a hole in the hose. I tweeted about the fact and Dyson was kind enough to send me a replacement hose, free of charge.

--My husband's truck. This was a Big Deal because my husband loves his truck to the point where if he sees kids playing too close to it, he'll go out and say something. My job was to turn it on every couple of days while he was gone so the battery wouldn't die since I do not drive large trucks. Look, guys, I have enough trouble driving my SMALL car around. If I drove the truck, I'd hit something. If I hit something, I'd scratch the truck which would make my husband convulse. I do not think the military would appreciate having a convulsing soldier so I do not drive the truck, I turn it on. Well. The truck acted pissy about this and REFUSED TO TURN ON one day. It turns out the battery died, so I had to replace it. Then it turned on again, which pleased my husband, but now he's like, "How's my truck?" before asking about MY well being. I'm kidding. Kind of.

--The computers. Yes, plural. First my computer started freezing up on me. Yes, it is six years old, but I was insulted by this. I did weekly scans and didn't put anything difficult on it (see: porn.) It should WORK for me! Then my son was like, "Uh, my laptop keeps having these weird pop ups." It turns out he got a trojan virus. I tried running Malaware Bytes but it freezes before it'll dump out the bad stuff. Thus, the pop ups remain.

--My car. Mind you, it didn't BREAK per say, but there I was minding my own business after a successful shopping trip to Target and it DINGS at me. It's all, "Check Tire Pressure!" and I'm like, "Check YOURSELF, I've had enough stuff break, I'm done." A couple minutes later, ANOTHER ding occurs: "Change Oil. 15% oil life." I groaned. "If you're smart enough to tell me I need an oil change, CHANGE IT YOURSELF!" I shrieked. Soon after I felt like a crazy person for screaming at an inanimate object and bought myself a pumpkin spice frappuccino from Starbucks to calm me down.

--My kids. My son is 11 and can be moody as anything. Nothing pleases him. He's offended I have gray hair already. "Does this mean you're very old?" He's offended what I make for dinner. "This looks strange." He's offended when I breathe. My daughter is 6 and is simply bossy. I let her play outside and call out when it is time to come in. She's all, "No thank you," and then takes off. My kids would not behave like this if my husband were here. My daughter would have said, "Yes Daddy!" while pressing a kiss to his cheek. My son would have said his bald head looks fantastic.

--House items. We're in base housing which means land of cheap so this isn't surprising. Towel bars suddenly snapped off. Wooden pieces from the bathroom drawer clattered to the ground while we stood many feet away from it. Paint began flicking off in the bathroom. Basically, our house seems to be melting around us.


--The lawnmower. It wouldn't turn on. There I was pulling the cord thingy and nothing happened. I cursed. I yelled. I kicked it. This was a cause for concern for someone who witnessed my behavior so they offered to help. THEY pulled the string and NOTHING. Luckily another fellow military wife knew someone who could fix it. I have no idea what they did but they managed to get it to turn on again. Yay! However. It's still acting up. The engine will work for a few minutes before shutting down completely. Yes there is oil. Yes there is gas. Everything just HATES ME. All my personal belongings are out to get me. I swear it.


--My iPhone. I mean, okay, it's not broken, but the new update is taking some time to get used to. Sometimes when I'm scrolling Facebook, I accidentally make that menu screen with the flashlight and all of that come up. I'm all, "Did I ASK for you to show up?" Like Stewie once shouted in Family Guy, "I don't like change!"



I'm ready for my husband to come home. I think he's tired of hearing me whine about how I feel like my personal belongings have made a pact to stop working. I know some people are like, "Never complain when your husband is deployed. He's dealing with enough." But screw that. I'm not going to sit there with folded hands and be like, "I'm having a GLORIOUS time here." For one, my husband would see right through it and ask if I was drunk. Two, I don't use the word glorious.

If all goes well, my husband should return next month. I'll hug him. I'll kiss him. And then I'll ask him to fix our things.

The Lorax DVD Winner!

I did a giveaway for The Lorax DVD here.


I used random.org to pick a winner and it chose...


....number 16, which is adagherkin.


Congrats!!


If you didn't win, I currently have other giveaways going on.


Win a copy of The Little Mermaid here.

Win a magazine subscription here.

Win an iPod Mini here.

Oklahoma State Fair Fun (Even With Rain!)

Does this freak anyone else out?

They were scattered all around the kiddie area at the Oklahoma State Fair. Yikes.

My Mom took Tommy to his fast rides--rides that Natalie isn't quite tall enough to go on--while I took Natalie into the kiddie section and proceeded to get freaked out by all the clown trashcans. I backed up into one and actually yelped.

Anyway, Natalie got to go on many rides:

Notice the dark clouds? After this picture an announcement came on that lightening was present nearby and that they had to shut the rides down. Everyone at the fair had to take cover.

"But I wasn't done!" Natalie informed me as we went to take shelter.

"I know. We have to wait for the storm to pass!"

We met up with my mom and Tommy and waited it out in the auto show building. When we came out, there was water everywhere. Some game stands had actually been blown over.

When rides opened again, Tommy thought he wanted to go on the Drop Zone ride. But when he got on, he began to panic that he'd fall out.

I wanted to shout, "It's okay, son, we're not at Six Flags!"

He decided NOT to ride and exited pretty quickly.

Mom led him off for more rides and I took Natalie back into Scary Clown Land.

We ended up having fun despite all the rain.

And what did we all eat?

For dinner, I had fried green tomatoes. And yes, I've seen the movie. I love it. Towanda! Natalie had a corn dog and Tommy had a hamburger, because odd fair foods freak him out. My Mom had fried artichoke hearts with a wine sauce.


For dessert I wanted to find the fried butter stand. I was intrigued. I mean...fried butter! I had to try it. So we walked around for awhile and found it!

I was pleasantly surprised. I didn't know what to expect. I thought I'd bite into a fried stick of Land O Lakes but no. Inside with a cinnamon sugar mixture. It reminded me of the Texas Roadhouse cinnamon butter. Fried. YUM! So try the fried butter! Do not be afraid!


The Oklahoma State Fair runs until September 22nd so if you are around the area, stop by! Or if you live in another state, check out your fair.

Try the fried butter!

(And yes, I've tried other fried foods before. I've tried fried twinkies and fried oreos. They are also delicious!)

Things That Annoy Me Thursday: Loud Musical Viewers

As I mentioned on Monday, I got to see Wicked.

I loved the show.

But I did not love the people who were eating and drinking during it.

I also did not care for the family who came to the show 20 minutes late. Of course they were in our row so we had to move and adjust ourselves so they could get by.

Look, I know things happen. But come on, if you're going to see a musical, have some respect and make an effort to get there on time. It's distracting when latecomers walk in.

The drinking part wasn't so bad.

But the food was.

There were actually signs saying NOT to eat in the theater. You could purchase food in the lobby and eat it there but people were sneaking the snacks in. The woman in front of us bought candy because I kept hearing the crinkle of the plastic as she reached in for me.

It's not a movie, people. It's a musical. Eating during a musical is not appropriate. Especially if you have a noisy food package.

So the next time you see a musical, ensure you arrive on time.

And for heavens sake, follow the rules and don't eat during it.

Funny Instagram Photos

If you follow me on Instagram, you've already seen these pictures. (I'm on Instagram as WhisperingWriter.) But they amused me so I had to share.


First.


Natalie picked up this book from the library. She was flipping through it and stopped on this picture:

"Are these frogs hugging?" she asked.

Uh.

Yeah, we went for that explanation.



Then when Tommy had a doctor's appointment he was flipping through the pamphlets they had out and got freaked out over this one:

He feels sorry for girls.

Hey, It's Okay Tuesday!

I got this idea from Glamour magazine. They have a section called Hey, It’s Okay and will list a bunch of things to be okay about. You're welcome to join in and do something like this on your blog. Doesn't have to be on a Tuesday either. Just make sure you link up and that the post you link up is a Hey, It's Okay Post.

----------------

To plan on pigging out at the State Fair. I love fair foods! Deep fried butter? Yes please. Bacon bombs? Of course! I figure all the walking around burns it off.


To hate that my computer is dying. It will freeze like every half hour to an hour. I've already run my virus scan. Nothing. Then I get pop ups saying that there are issues with exe. Does anyone know how to fix it? My computer IS old. It still has Windows Vista. But if I can fix it, I'd prefer to do that instead of getting a new computer.


To really dislike it when people go, “How are we this morning?” I have to bite my tongue from replying, “I’m fine, I’m not sure about you though.”


To be intrigued that McDonalds is selling spicy boneless chicken wings in certain states to test out how it does. I want to try some! I love spicy foods. I love McDonalds. Win/Win!


To have followed some of the actors from the Wicked show we saw Sunday on Twitter. It's taking all my willpower not to gush dramatically at them how much I love their voices.


To be excited for all the new fall shows to be starting up. There are new ones I want to check out such as Sleepy Hollow, The Michael J Fox Show, Trophy Wife, The Goldbergs....the list goes on and on. I watch a lot of TV.


To have lots of giveaways going on right now. You can win a Blu-Ray+DVD copy of The Lorax here. Find out how to win an iPad Mini here. Win a subscription to a magazine here. (There will be 9 winners!) Win a Blu-Ray+DVD copy of The Little Mermaid here.

Natalie Saw Her First Musical: Wicked!

"Wicked!"

This was the first thing Natalie yelled yesterday morning.

I had told her for months that we were going to get to see the musical. I kept reminding her that we had to be quiet during the show. We could not shout, "WHAT HAPPENED?" if we were concerned about something. We could not yell, "I want her dress!" when Glinda came on stage.

Look, I know my daughter. I know she is capable of doing those things.

We drove to the Civic Center and took a picture with the Wicked sign:

It's a little blurry because electronics confuse my mother.


I had seen Wicked in NYC a couple of years ago with my best friend Jennifer. The stage was set up the same as it was there:

Natalie was worried about the dragon. "It's not going to try and eat us, is it?"

"It will if you talk during the show," I answered.

Natalie's mouth dropped open.

The show began and I was immediately sucked into the music and storyline. Yes, I might have seen it before in NYC but it was still amazing. I always marvel when people can sing. Really sing. This is because I can't carry a note. Natalie cracked up during the song Popular and whispered to me that she wanted Glinda's pink dress. Natalie climbed on my lap when the Wizard's face began to talk. The flying monkeys also made her a bit nervous. She loved the Defying Gravity number. She had seen it on YouTube so she knew Elphaba was going to fly. When she did, Natalie went, "She's magic."

At intermission when the lights came on Natalie went, "That's all? That wasn't an ending."

I explained intermission to her as we went out to stretch our legs. I saw the long line stretching out of the women's bathroom and thought, "Thank goodness I don't have to go. Thank goodness we don't have wa--"

"Mommy? I need to pee," Natalie said.

Ugh.

So we had to wait in the long line.

Then we went back to our seats and the show began again. It was still amazing. I knew the ending. I knew what to expect. But it still made me tear up. Especially with the For Good song. I once tried to explain it to Tom after I had seen it in NYC. "And...they had to say GOODBYE to each other. They told each other how they helped one another...through SONG. Would you ever tell me how I made you a better person through song?" I asked Tom, gripping his arm. "No. Never," he answered. Rude.

Anyway, Natalie was concerned when Elphaba melted.

"But I loved her!" Natalie whispered. "I loved her," she said into my ear.

I won't give away what happens because I know there are still people out there who don't know. I know this because of all the gasps I heard in the audience.

The show was fabulous. I loved the cast--they were just as good as the one in NYC. However, I preferred the atmosphere in NYC because, hello, it's NYC. Also, that theater was more civilized. The Civic Center allowed people to come to the show late. Which irked me because hello, distracting. Also, you could drink and they said not to eat food, but people still ate food so you could hear the paper crinkling from said food. Annoying. But other than that, I still loved Wicked. I think I would love Wicked if children sang it off key. The story is just that good.

(Does anyone else love the name Boq?)

When the show was over, some actors came out to take donations for the tornado victims. Not Elphaba or Glinda. Natalie wished. She wanted to tell Glinda that she loved her sparkly dress and clown. She wanted to tell Elphaba that it made her sad when she melted. She also wanted to tell her she liked her flying broom.

There was a flying monkey walking around and Natalie was excited to meet him at first, but then when we got up close she attached herself to my leg and went, "I'm freaked out!" So we left the flying monkey and found the dude who played the wizard. He had an awesome voice. Talking and singing. Very soothing.

"That man who drank the green juice told me he liked my dress," Natalie informed me primly after the picture.


If you haven't seen Wicked, you should! You'll love it!

If you're around the Oklahoma City area, it'll play until September 22nd so you still have time. And no, I was not paid to say that. I just love Wicked that much. I'd go see it again if I had the money.

Now if you'll excuse me, I'm off to listen to the soundtrack and pretend as though I can sing.